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Original poster

To be crying at this

193 replies

appledoors · 26/08/2025 23:17

I saw it on TikTok, then noticed it shared on Facebook too. I usually hate soppy sentimental crap but the fact that I am that exact age (32) right now (and very PMS-y) and I don’t know it just hit a nerve 😭

…………….

I'm 80 years old, and somehow..

I woke up in my 32 year old body.

Just for one day.

I wake up to little hands tugging at the blankets.

"Mummy, wake up!" they shout.

I blink, and I sit up slowly.

My babies. They're small again!

I gasp. I cry.

They climb into bed giggling, wiggling.

I used to rush through mornings.. but not today.

I pull them close.
I hug them tight.
I kiss their messy hair.
I hold their little hands.

This time, I soak in every second.

I catch my reflection in the bathroom mirror.

No deep lines.
No grey hair.
My younger face...
I used to think I looked old at 41.

What a silly thought.

I stare for a moment and think, "You are so beautiful."

I find my husband in the kitchen, making coffee.
He looks strong, young.

I wrap my arms around him so tightly.

He looks surprised.

Maybe we didn't hug enough back then, I think.

We talk about the day nothing big.

But today, it all feels big.

I memorise the sound of his voice.

We pile into the car, kids arguing over seatbelts.
Someone drops a snack.
Crumbs everywhere.

I used to get so frustrated.

I soak in the noise, the chaos I know my car will be quiet and spotless for many years to come.

But I'll miss the mess.

Dinner is loud and unorganised.
No one wants to sit still.
There's shouting, giggling, a little arguing and so much life.

I don't clean up right away.

I just sit and watch.

Trying to burn it all into my memory.

Before bed, I pick up the phone.

I call my mum. And I hear her voice.

Mum..MUM.

I haven't heard this voice in so many years..
I close my eyes and let her words wash over me.
I tell her I love her again and again.
I never want to hang up.

This time, I don't leave anything unsaid.

At bedtime, I don't skip pages in the story.
Not tonight.
I read every single word.
Then I ask, "Can we read one more book?"
They say yes.
I don't want this day to end.

I got one more day.

And this time, I knew.
This was joy.
This was love.
Those little hands.
The loud, messy dinners.
Our strong, young bodies with no aches or pains.
Our parents who are still alive..

It all mattered so much more than we ever realised.

OP posts:
Muffsies · 27/08/2025 12:19

Screamingabdabz · 27/08/2025 11:57

Who are these ‘older people’ you’re generalising about? Those who’ve brought up kids know the relentlessness and the hard work and would never go back to it. That poem is fanciful bollocks and most posters on this thread have said the same!

Show quote history

Well, that's my reaction, and the reaction of most people who are well acquainted with working and parenthood. But if you'll read some of the posters experiences above, there are some veteran parents out there who'll have you believe different.

UnsolicitedMice · 27/08/2025 12:20

Ilovegerardway · 27/08/2025 11:59

Your cleaning up right away made me remember a woman I used to know when my eldest was a toddler.

She always said she loved every second with her children, so she did nothing but play. Which is great (her child was one of those ones who was just so easy going and lovely, my ds was Damien in comparison, so no, I did not love every second), but no one loves everything about something.

One day, she invited a few of us from playgroup to her house and christ, it was in the days of Kim and Aggy, and it was like a house off one of their programmes. Everybody suddenly became extremely hydrated and refused a drink as the kitchen was disgusting.

Anyway, she stated going on and on about how she spend every second with her child, how we were all wasting our time tidying up. One very blunt women stepped on a stray cat shit and said, “for the love of fuck woman, shut up and clean your hovel, your kid won’t thank you for this no matter how many puzzles you do with her.”

I know that’s an extreme example, but she’s who I think of when I hear people say the cleaning can wait. She took that and ran with it.

Edited
Show quote history

Exactly. It’s all so extreme and unrealistic. And always aimed at mums.

5128gap · 27/08/2025 12:21

Crying here too. I think its something that's only meaningful to people at the age of looking back though. If I'd seen it in my 30s I'd be rolling my eyes and it wouldn't have made me stop and be appreciative. You rarely do know what you've got till it's gone. Such is human nature.

Nanny0gg · 27/08/2025 12:21

appledoors · 27/08/2025 11:25

For me it was just a reminder that one day, should I live to older age, everything will be completely different. Right now my children are small-ish and cute and my mum and dad live round the corner, I can pick up the phone at any point and talk to them. I think it’s easy to forget how it’s not permanent.

Show quote history

It's not completely different

It doesn't happen overnight

And it's just normal

I don't spend my days living in the past

Muffsies · 27/08/2025 12:23

owlexpress · 27/08/2025 12:14

You are... Again I think you're totally missing the point. It's just about counting your blessings and could apply to any stage of life. The writing is presumably aimed at a 32 year old young mother, but could just as easily be aimed at a 55 year old mother of adults in their 20s. Imagine you're having a bad day, your boiler has broken, you've had a fight with your daughter, your washing has been caught in the rain, and you're totally fed up. It's more about realising that one day (all being well) you'll be older or sicker and will look back on these days as the 'good old days'.

It's really not that deep guys.

Show quote history

It's really not nice or reassuring either. So when im feeling shit I should savour it because in 20 years its going to be soooo much shitter?

🤣 sorry, I know that's not exactly what you meant. But I still think whatever message it's giving, about 80% of parents reading it will wish it hadn't bothered.

5128gap · 27/08/2025 12:30

Muffsies · 27/08/2025 12:23

It's really not nice or reassuring either. So when im feeling shit I should savour it because in 20 years its going to be soooo much shitter?

🤣 sorry, I know that's not exactly what you meant. But I still think whatever message it's giving, about 80% of parents reading it will wish it hadn't bothered.

Show quote history

I don't read it that way. I'm a very happy 56 year old with a life I love. I wouldn't want a pernenant return to my 30s. But one day to go back and visit my small children and see and hear my mum again? I'd be there for that in a heart beat.

owlexpress · 27/08/2025 12:30

Muffsies · 27/08/2025 12:23

It's really not nice or reassuring either. So when im feeling shit I should savour it because in 20 years its going to be soooo much shitter?

🤣 sorry, I know that's not exactly what you meant. But I still think whatever message it's giving, about 80% of parents reading it will wish it hadn't bothered.

Show quote history

That's a negative way to look at it. It's not even just about parents. I struggle with my mental health at times and one of the things that helps me is to practice gratitude. So if I'm having a tough time at work, I'm feeling skint, I'm having issues with my friends or family, I'm not feeling well or something, it does help me to put it in perspective and think 'the good news is that I have a job, I might be tight for money this month but I can afford the essentials and some, I am healthy and mobile. It could be a lot worse'.

nomas · 27/08/2025 12:33

It’s very badly written and twee. Short sentences to hide the fact that they can’t write.

BeanQuisine · 27/08/2025 12:59

It's a nice little piece, obviously manipulating the heartstrings but truthful enough.

I quite often have similar dreams where I'm back in the company of lost loved ones, and relishing the moment. They're really very comforting.

Anon501178 · 27/08/2025 13:04

My husband read this out to me the other day and I was bawling, and it's making me cry again now.

I often see middle aged- older ladies looking wistfully at me with my little ones and can tell they are probably thinking how lucky i am, that these are the best years of my life and to relish that.

I dread being like that one day :(

Anon501178 · 27/08/2025 13:10

5128gap · 27/08/2025 12:21

Crying here too. I think its something that's only meaningful to people at the age of looking back though. If I'd seen it in my 30s I'd be rolling my eyes and it wouldn't have made me stop and be appreciative. You rarely do know what you've got till it's gone. Such is human nature.

I'm in my 30s and it really got me, but I'm an emotional and sentimental sort of person and mothering young children is a dream come true for me, so it's sad to imagine it ending one day.

UnsolicitedMice · 27/08/2025 13:12

Anon501178 · 27/08/2025 13:04

My husband read this out to me the other day and I was bawling, and it's making me cry again now.

I often see middle aged- older ladies looking wistfully at me with my little ones and can tell they are probably thinking how lucky i am, that these are the best years of my life and to relish that.

I dread being like that one day :(

I often see middle aged- older ladies looking wistfully at me with my little ones and can tell they are probably thinking how lucky i am, that these are the best years of my life and to relish that.

Don’t assume! As a middle-aged older woman, I am not remotely like that. I would rather be now, having mini breaks with my young adult kids and watching crap TV with them, rather than pushing swings in a playground or sitting through an interminable school concert! We are all different and not all full of regret. I adore my children but I prefer them grown up ;-)

Anon501178 · 27/08/2025 13:12

lotsofpatience · 27/08/2025 11:15

Who writes that garbage? Fuck that shit. At least you reached your 80s you silly woman!
Not addressed to you, OP, but the author of that turd.
I think your hormones are tripping you up big time.

Wow, so much vitriol! 😳

Anon501178 · 27/08/2025 13:15

UnsolicitedMice · 27/08/2025 13:12

I often see middle aged- older ladies looking wistfully at me with my little ones and can tell they are probably thinking how lucky i am, that these are the best years of my life and to relish that.

Don’t assume! As a middle-aged older woman, I am not remotely like that. I would rather be now, having mini breaks with my young adult kids and watching crap TV with them, rather than pushing swings in a playground or sitting through an interminable school concert! We are all different and not all full of regret. I adore my children but I prefer them grown up ;-)

Show quote history

Yes obviously everyone is different that's true that some mothers are glad to be past those days.
I guess there's just something sometimes in the way they look that seems like there's a sense of wishing they could go back, and you do sometimes hear older people say that their years with young children were the best years of their life.

Crunchymum · 27/08/2025 13:17

Awww I quite liked it! I look at my stroppy pre-teens and sometimes don't even recognise them as the little creatures they once were.

Anything to do with seeing or speaking to your mum again always gets me though.

DarklingIlisten · 27/08/2025 13:19

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ due to privacy concerns.

UnsolicitedMice · 27/08/2025 13:21

I think it is really important for women not to make their life just about their kids. Of course they are the most important part of your life, especially when they are younger. But it is really important to focus on yourself as a person and have friends or hobbies or work or other things going on.

Yes, it is an emotional milestone when the kids leave home. But you can then move onto a different stage of life with other happy memories and also live a life of your own. If your life is empty, then it will be much easier to focus wistfully on the busy, chaotic years of early childhood. As long as you have other stuff going on for you, you don’t have to weep about the years gone by. You can also think about the future that lies ahead for you, a different stage of being. It is not necessarily all sad and empty.

BilbaoBaggage · 27/08/2025 13:23

Anon501178 · 27/08/2025 13:04

My husband read this out to me the other day and I was bawling, and it's making me cry again now.

I often see middle aged- older ladies looking wistfully at me with my little ones and can tell they are probably thinking how lucky i am, that these are the best years of my life and to relish that.

I dread being like that one day :(

Sorry but you have no idea what other people are thinking unless they tell you. At least some of us are looking at you thinking thank the gods that I am no longer in stage of life. And you simply do not know that you are in the best years of your life. I find it very sad that you think that child rearing is as good as your life gets.

UnsolicitedMice · 27/08/2025 13:25

This reply has been deleted

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ due to privacy concerns.

Well exactly. Everybody’s life and experiences are different.

What is the alternative to your kids leaving home and growing older and less dependent?

I consider myself fortunate that so far, my kids have not had health issues or special needs that have held them back. They have managed to progress through the educational system and have exciting futures and plans ahead, socially and at work. For that I am very grateful.

I am sure none of us want our children to not to develop at all beyond early childhood. That’s why I have always celebrated each new milestone and stage of life. I think it’s a real privilege to see your kids grow up like this, not something to be too upset about.

Ilovegerardway · 27/08/2025 13:48

Anon501178 · 27/08/2025 13:04

My husband read this out to me the other day and I was bawling, and it's making me cry again now.

I often see middle aged- older ladies looking wistfully at me with my little ones and can tell they are probably thinking how lucky i am, that these are the best years of my life and to relish that.

I dread being like that one day :(

A lot of them are probably thinking thank fuck they are out of that stage to be fair. Peri menopause usually gets rid of those pesky hormones that make you wistful about little children.

Anon501178 · 27/08/2025 13:49

BilbaoBaggage · 27/08/2025 13:23

Sorry but you have no idea what other people are thinking unless they tell you. At least some of us are looking at you thinking thank the gods that I am no longer in stage of life. And you simply do not know that you are in the best years of your life. I find it very sad that you think that child rearing is as good as your life gets.

Show quote history

Yes i do think it will be actually.Its all I ever wanted so I'm at the peak of that.

We don't have much money so we won't be retiring early and able to indulge ourselves in holidays away together etc.I've never had an interest in building up a career, and i'm not very academic.I enjoy meals out, trips to the cinema or gigs etc with friends, but my children fulfil me and life before them always felt abit boring, so I don't look forward to going back to that one day to be honest.They will always be my life focus, although I won't hold them back from spreading their wings when the time comes of course.

But it's fine if you don't share that opinion though...each to their own, everybody has different focuses, priorities and interests.

I'm sure there are probably middle aged l
people with viewpoints similar to each of us.The posts i've seen on this site reflect that as some can't wait for their children to grow up and 'get their lives back' others are in bits emotionally as their children go off to Uni or move out or say they desperately miss the 'little years'

DarklingIlisten · 27/08/2025 13:54

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ due to privacy concerns.

Fedupoftheshits · 27/08/2025 13:57

It made me cry 😢 Sometimes I think back to when I’ve wished time away especially when the kids were little and I found things a struggle and then boom it’s happened and you want to step back in time (although not to the whingy shitty times)

PInkyStarfish · 27/08/2025 14:08

I think it’s only sad if you reach that age and you haven’t achieved having a wonderful and loving family.

Digidestined · 27/08/2025 15:50

BilbaoBaggage · 27/08/2025 13:23

Sorry but you have no idea what other people are thinking unless they tell you. At least some of us are looking at you thinking thank the gods that I am no longer in stage of life. And you simply do not know that you are in the best years of your life. I find it very sad that you think that child rearing is as good as your life gets.

Show quote history

How nasty!

The ones that are thanking the gods they're not in that stage of life anymore won't be gazing wistfully at mums with young children will they 🙄

As for your closing sentence, I don't understand the MN take that raising children is miserable drudgery and if you enjoy it there's something wrong with you. I have a wonderful life and did before I had my daughter but all the time I spend with my toddler who is my favourite person in the world I always think these are the best days of my life. I'm just so happy! All the older people I know of both sexes tell me the happiest years of their lives were when their kids were young. You don't have to grit your teeth and tell yourself it gets better you know! And enjoying having young children more than anything else doesn't make you boring or the rest of your life shit either.

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