I've just seen the most depressing thing

[Havesomecommonsense]

In a coffee shop, in comes a Dad and his daughter (roughly 3 years old)
He made a comment to the daughter about this being a weekly visit before he dropped her back to the mum
He then sat her on his lap, gave her a phone and she watched instagram videos and he watched his own phone holding it over her head..
He gave her some food, which she kept choking on intermittently. He barely said 2 words to her
Yes I'm judging, but fgs do better

So you’re happy to use screens, just in private?

I didn't misquote you. It's literally lifted from your post. You think that's normal, I feel sorry for the kid that hes expected remain silent and not interrupt adults. You did a second post after about offering him a drink. Fine, but I'm still allowed to think that's quite a victorian expectation for an 8yo.

Watching TV together for half an hour and discussing the programme is far less harmful than ignoring your kid while in a coffee shop. To be fair if they had discussed something on a screen together, fine. But he was clearly just ignoring her from what OP describes and I see this crappy parenting constantly. It’s obvious that you use screens constantly if you can’t even put them away for half an hour to enjoy a coffee/cake together.

Also OP - even more depressing is people who have their kid aged 12 months or whatever watching a tablet or phone while in the pushchair, when they could either be interacting with a parent (if parent facing) or observing the world (if not). Screens are most harmful when they replace normal human activity and experience — but sadly I see it constantly.

WTF are you on about?!?! So anyone who scrolls on their phone is on benefits now?!?!? Wowwwww that has got to be the biggest stretch I’ve ever read on here…🤯

For twenty minutes? That's too much for an eight year old? Ok...that's why I get 11 year olds in my classroom who cannot wait their turn to speak, expect to have their issue attended to instantly and OFSTED expects everyone lesson to be an all singing all dancing entertainment in case god forbid they are a bit bored at any point.

And I'd be removing your access to my daughter. Ridiculous post

It's not acceptable for Anyone that a child is ignored while struggling to eat properly

Screens in prams????
Ffs

you still haven't replied to my question,

how old are YOUR kids OP?

I will refer you to the comment above to a different PP.
This is a chat forum about an opinion I have, I'm not entering in to the gaslighting and the personal distractions that some PP like to do

Your post makes no sense in relation to that post either.

Yeah it’s so depressing. Always found it sad walking my daughter and I’d be pointing out different objects and extending her vocab etc and then you walk past others with a kid watching a phone. Just sad.

So much misplaced confidence. 🤷

"and not interrupt adults"??? Of course they shouldn't be interrupting adults. Bloody hell, this is basic parenting/manners. So they start school never being told to not interrupt and they start interrupting teacher etc. Yeah brilliant parenting.

As an ex teacher I would rather you bring your child up by involving him in conversations. You don’t interrupt in a rude way when an adult is mid sentence but during a discussion, they should be free to join in. If what you have to say isn’t suitable then save the discussion for another time. I agree with PP sitting there for twenty mins while the adults talk sounds very old fashioned.

What, of your daughter's own child?! Really??

Again I am astonished at how many people are defending this behaviour as ok and normal.
If the father of your child only spent 1 hour a week with them and half of that was spent with them staring gormless at inappropriate content on a phone whilst he ignored them, you’d be ok with that??
A full time parent, allowing their child half an hour screen time whilst they recharge and have some time to decompress is not the same thing.
Excess screen time is detrimental to small children’s language and relationships. That’s just fact.

So you agree with me then? Although you've went a strange way about it.

You don’t interrupt in a rude way when an adult is mid sentence

The rest of your post is patronising nonsense.

Also why is everyone ignoring the choking?

Because your entire thread comes off as very goady and clearly the child wasn’t actually choking?

Not goady
And yes she was choking, she kept spluttering and coughing it back out.

But surely you see there’s times when this might be necessary… example from me recently… using my maps to find my way to the eye hospital after getting a bus and a train with my tiny baby. I’ve just found out he is blind due to a rare genetic condition. I wasn’t being lazy or anti social and it’s really pathetic to think someone might see that and think I’m depriving my baby when I’m going through the worst time of my life. Sure 99% of the time it’s probably nothing that serious but that 1% of the time is when you should mind your own business

Goady.

So she wasn’t cooking but coughing on food which is normal for babies and young children? If she was genuinely choking why did nobody around her step in to help?

Because choking’s an emergency - she would have died if she was choking and every adult around her was ignoring her.

i think you mean she coughed on some food in the way that young children often do as part of learning to eat. Unless you’re telling us you sat and posted on Mumsnet as you watched a child choke instead of calling attention to the emergency and performing first aid?