I've been a misanthrope since I was young because I was bullied constantly at school and even by my own family. I spent the days split between feeling anxious all day at school wondering when the next rude remark was coming at me, to then going home and walking on eggshells to not upset my tempermental parent until bedtime. I then left education and my first job was retail and faced the wrath of the general public.
None of my real life experiences enamoured people as a group to me. I had great friends but everyone outside that was held in suspicion of potentially hurting me in some way.
It was wonderful when I finally got an office job with a small group of people who managed to keep their rude opinions to themselves. Even that was a time made stressful by again, people, housemates slamming doors at 5am even on weekends. Or leaving mouldy food out. Or whatever annoying shit housemates tend to do.
Fast forward to now, I live with a carefully chosen partner (after living blissfully alone for a few years). In a small village where community spirit is still alive and as someone pointed out in another thread hasn't got the aninomity to act like a complete tool, like people can in cities.
I live in a holiday area and you can tell who isn't local just by the way they drive. No hand waves when giving way on country roads. Expecting the person who's in the trickier spot to reverse because they can't. Whenever I drive into populated England the roads are heaving, and the verges are full of litter. I absolutely despair of the pictures after bank holiday weekends of the beaches absolutely swathes in litter. I've spent time in Scandinavia and it's like a different world there compared to the UK - much smaller population helps. People just don't seem to care at the moment. I get why with the world and the news being a constant doom cycle. But bugger me what happened to not shitting in your own back yard?!
After a long ramble, I know that the people in my life and community and mostly good people. But I've had far too many experiences with the wrong uns to ever trust people fully again. I plan to leave this world better and definitely not worse than I left it.
I've defo been an accidental nob in the past on my bad days but I endeavour not to be one now or ever. For example, the barman served me last on Friday, despite me being there halfway though the line. I was swearing to all hell in my head. But when he finally got to me I was all sweetness and polite. Because I figured he was just overwhelmed working alone and made a mistake. Lesson learned, I sent my husband up for round two when the bar was empty 😂