MIL bathing habits

[Bitesize89]

My in laws come to stay with us pretty frequently and I've noticed over time that mil never bathes when she comes. She can be here 3-4 days without a shower or bath. It recently was revealed that she only ever uses baths and no soap in her bath. This came up after she bagged my DD and didn't use any soap on her and she said well there was bubble bath in the water, I was shocked as I don't think that's a proper way to bathe and she said when she bathes she doesn't use soap and only bubble bath. So not only does she not bathe for days on and but when she bathes she just has a bubble bath and no soap.im really grossed out.

Some people are over washing and some are under washing, solved it all 😆

Yes people must have stunk

It’s just a MIL-bashing thread. Very tedious.

Also seconding that washing your vulva with soap can be irritating and harmful. I get yeast infections if I do. I just wash around it (the ‘leg pit’ areas) and rinse thoroughly in between the labia. No issues with smell.

I used to live in a village in a developing country. We couldn't 'waste' water on baths or showers, but we all kept perfectly clean by having strip washes with a couple of mugs of water in a bowl.

This thread has just made me realise that I grew up in the 70s and there used to be lots of Matey bubble bath adverts on tv. One of the USPs of Matey was that it cleaned the kids that had a bath with it - without the need for using soap as well.
Which has just made me realise that, as a result of that advert, I’d always assumed that if you used bubble bath (excluding Matey 😆) you also needed to use soap… And <ahem> 50 years later, I still use soap to get clean if I was having a bubble bath. Albeit these days bubble baths are few and far between, 99% of time I shower and baths are a rare treat to relax so it’s not a big deal in the way that the arguments have blown up on this thread’

But do you not see that there are people who would find this gross and disgusting, to dry yourself with a towel that has been used to dry your arse, or someone else’s, or wear clothes that have the stale sweat of two days earlier. Rank!

You’ve just decided that this is a standard that suits your lifestyle, budget and body. Other people may have much higher standards than you.

You do know that there is more than one way to wash yourself, don’t you?.
In the time it takes to fill a bath, we could all top to toe wash. There were 4 of us kids.
My father had the bath, we could if we wanted, use the bath after him, but none of us did.
Bath night was Saturday, because we had to attend Sunday School, the following day.
The rest of the time it was top to toe, with a sink full of hot or cold water.
Yes, I sometimes still do it, although, I do enjoy a quick shower.
Your mil and I are of a different generation and I suspect like me, in a queue for the only family bathroom. Which meant in and out because you were not the only one.
I was about 13 before I could have a bath or shower when I wanted and yes bubble bath was used as a soap!.
Stop being judgemental and mind your own business, be thankful you have a mil that cares for her grandkids.

What's your point? Obviously there's people who are hyper clean to the point of obsessiveness. I can't stand the performative cleanliness of people who won't sit on their sofa in a pair of jeans that have been outside for example. That doesn't mean it there isn't a good logic to being clean enough that your clothes remain clean for more than a few wears. The stale sweat you speak of - sweat doesn't smell, it smells when it meets bacteria on your skin. If you're wearing underclothes with your day clothes and then washing every day, your sheets and pyjamas are on clean skin and unless you get night sweats then they aren't encountering sweat and getting dirty. Wearing pyjamas more than once isn't a gotcha for not showering everyday. If you're not washing AND not wearing fresh clothes every time then you are going to smell because you have sweat mixed with bacteria on your skin (but no one will embarrass you by pointing it out)

In the same way you don’t put neat washing up liquid on every item you wash, bubble bath washes you. I can’t use it due to eczema so use dove soap (which technically isn’t classed as a soap). Also wash every 2-3 days. I’m not a sweaty person at all and have very dry skin so bathing too much makes my eczema really sore. The obsession with daily showers is a more recent thing. I don’t remember the 1980s being stinky and back then we bathed twice a week and I shared with my sibling. Friends all did the same and our class wasn’t stinky except Zack - not sure he bathed ever.

I’m merely pointing out that we all make our own decisions about what is right for us and (some people) what is considered obsessive or gross.

That line is different for everyone depending on their bodies. Some
need to shower twice a day and wear strong deodorant otherwise they smell, other people don’t sweat as much or have sensitive skin which means they shower less.

But to throw around the insults that have been hurled around on here, or demand an Unclean bell, is narrow-minded and judgemental and speaks to a lack of curiosity and understanding about how other people live their lives.

Personally I don't sit on my bed in "outside" clothes (clothes I've worn on the bus, basically), but that's only because there have been multiple social media rants about people pooing on buses in our local area, and people changing babies on the seats!

But yes, clean skin into pyjamas is not the same as dirty skin into pyjamas

Yeah but I think a polite society there's a minimum standard which is to wash all your crevices at least once a day whether that's a standing sink wash or more efficiently popping in the shower. People can obviously make their own decisions that they don't want to do that more than a couple of times a week but they will and do smell. Lots of people don't believe in washing their hands with soap after using the loo - just because that's their personal decision of hygiene doesn't mean it isn't objectively gross.

Lovely 😄👏

It’s a generational thing. I’m 51, and the youngest of three. My mum is 87. We weren’t aware of it growing up (my Mums washing habits) but we too were only bathed once per week and had to share the water! I think it was a hangover from the war and rationing as others have said.
But then I realised my mum didn’t ever shower and her hair has only ever been washed at the hairdresser - she refused to come swimming on holidays for fear of getting her hair wet. I guess she had a bath every fortnight if that. She now has a Carer every other day who we have asked to give her a shower twice a week but my mum refuses. Very different mindset to later generations - and I had to add she never smelt bad!!

Your MIL might be like me. I don’t like bathing or showering at other people’s houses, so I don’t do it. I do wash the bits that need attention, but at the hand basin standing on a towel.

Showering isn’t a substitute for a bath, I’m a bit grossed out by women whose nether regions never see soap and water. Bidets should be compulsory in every bathroom!

Except there are proven medical reasons for hand washing after going
to the loo, before preparing food. We don’t do it to be ‘polite’ we do it to prevent infection and cross-contamination

Where is the scientific evidence that we need to shower everyday- I would argue that there is more scientific evidence that we do not.

Harvard University for example. I believe they are quite good https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/showering-daily-is-it-necessary-2019062617193

All scents are 'chemical' scents, whether they are artificial or not.

That line is different for everyone depending on their bodies. Some
need to shower twice a day and wear strong deodorant otherwise they smell, other people don’t sweat as much or have sensitive skin which means they shower less.

Are you suggesting that people who clean frequently naturally smell worse than those who don’t?

Firstly, it’s unlikely that those who wash twice a day or use deodorant daily are even aware of their natural body odour - because they’re in a routine where they are not exposed to their body odour. Therefore, there’s no evidence to support the idea that they only wash to cover extreme body odour, rather than simply being hygienic.

Secondly, it’s a logical conclusion that those who don’t wash frequently do smell. While it’s impossible to know for sure on an internet forum, it’s more likely that you or your home smell bad due to infrequent washing. While there’s a range of time it takes for a person to smell without washing, the average person won’t present as an extreme case, such as not smelling after a week without washing.

There’s plenty of stinky people in public and there’s a greater probability that those people are in the “infrequent washer” camp, as opposed to “frequent”.

That must be why I included the word artificial as well; it is essential to my meaning.

Yes exactly. You might say fragrant. Or just clean perhaps. Lovely 💕

My grandparents lived in a house with no bathroom and just an outside toilet. They would have a strip wash in the kitchen twice a day and a bath in a tin bath in front of the fire once a week. They were very clean people. I love a daily shower but it really isn't necessary and can be bad for our skin.