To think it’s polite not to pass wind/fart around people, including spouses?

[ServingMHissues]

Me and my Dsis are having a debate since I, have mentioned that me nor DH tend to pass wind around eachother and never have. We’ve been together 11 years and have two kids. We’re very comfortable with eachother and he’s definitely heard me do it because I strictly remember one Halloween he was passing me decorations to put up and my heavily pregnant body just couldn’t hold it in 🤣

but Dsis thinks we’re weird and it’s weird for a couple not to fart around eachother. I personally think it’s just polite not to if you don’t absolutely need to, you can excuse yourself from the room/area. Maybe it’s because I used to get really annoyed at an ex who would fart constantly and they would smell absolutely foul and would make me feel physically ill. But I just wouldn’t want to make someone smell my gas 🤣

AIBU to think it’s not that weird to just not fart around your spouses?!🤣

The more veg I have the more I fart. Soup is a new level of farting for me..

😀Well, I don’t know how to account for my and DH’s comparative fartlessness, so.

Why is it bad for you? Just go somewhere discreet like the bathroom and do it. You’re not going to be holding it in for more than an hour or so - worst case.

YANBU. We don’t fart in front of each other. DP goes to the bathroom if he needs to fart. I think I’d find it a bit of a turn off if he farted in front on me!

I fart infront of my husband and children. We give a warning before that we have "Oh no Bellyache" do a massive fart amd say "Phew Bellyache gone" and if it's particularly loud we do all end up laughing (yes we are immature). Of course we show much more restraint if we have guests but I'm not hiding my gas from people I share a home with.

I’ve never found farts funny - even as a child. My partner farts around me and I really wish he wouldn’t. At least he tries to be discreet about it, I guess.

I was the same in every one of my relationships, and in my current relationship. I don’t do it in front of anyone else so why would a partner be any different? It’s basic manners.

I don't think farting around your spouse is any big deal. We all do it, and it can be really hard to hold them in.

However, I never really understand people who find them irresistibly funny. Given that it's something you've been doing all your life, doesn't the humour pall?

I don't fart around other people as far as possible. Of course farting is perfectly natural but personally I think it's rude to expect people to breathe in air that just left your arse.

Oh me and DH are doomed, 28 years together and we fart in front of each other, I moan about him farting, he moans about me farting....right off for a divorce - does farting in your sleep count as DH does that pretty much every night at some point...I think I'm entitled to a bigger stake in our house for the nocturnal farting... surely??

My OH farted around me from the start pretty much but I managed to avoid it for 18 months or so, until I had Covid and the most terrible farts. He was in bed with me and I did one (quietly) but it reached my nostrils first and Jesus, Mary and the wee donkey I’ve never smelled anything so awful in my life. It could have been weaponised it was that bad. I felt it only fair to warn him I’d just done a terrible fart, he chuckled and said ah that’s ok…but then the smell hit him and the colour literally drained from his face and he crawled to the French windows to open them and get some air.

After that the gloves were off really. Never looked back and we both fart with gay abandon. It doesn’t make me love him any less and I think he feels the same about me.

Well it can cause discomfort. Its bad for your colon in general. Can cause bad breath. Can even be linked to hemorrhoids.

Holding it in for a few minutes to leave the room is fine.

Regularly holding it in for an hour or more is not - it can reabsorb, it can come out via your mouth/nose instead as foul breath - it can cause trapped wind and bloating - can badly affect gut function, slowing down the passage of poo and leading to constipation - it can (listen up for those who regularly hold on for hours!) damage your ability to determine gas from poo and thus weaken bowel control/awareness long term.

I think there's a really interesting divide in the country that someone should study tbh. My mother is a therapist and we were discussing the lines people draw of what is private, vs what is private within a relationship. It's quite interesting and farting definitely splits into 2 groups. 1 group would say that true intimacy is being able to totally be yourself, let it all go (so to speak), be your authentic self and for your partner to accept that. The other group would say it's actually just not that nice and much better to hide that part, go somewhere else, hold it for a bit to keep some mystique and save their partners nostrils. Personally, whilst day to day I'm not super gassy, no chance am I getting out of bed in the night out of concern for my partner so I can fart in the bathroom. He generally feels the same so we probably fall into the 1st group. We dont find it funny, we just accept its a body function and its uncomfortable holding it in or wandering round the house to find a quiet place to do it privately and i wouldnt inflict that on him. We've lived together through childbirth, stomach bugs, food poisoning and flushing the toilet with buckets when the water stopped working for a weekend. We can cope with a fart and still love each other/find each other attractive. I always wonder as well what other things gets hidden, it reminds me of the start of Mrs Maisel when she takes her make up off after he's asleep and wakes up early to put it on again, so he doesn't see her do it. Or people who cover up some of their less appealing feelings or traits because they feel they should hold them back to save their partner seeing their less attractive qualities.

We are a farting couple. We are mid 50s, professionals, no medical conditions.

I have no hesitation to fart. For an impending smelly fart, I would never go to the bathroom. Doing a smelly fart next to my husband and watch him react and complain - is one of life's pleasures?

Having a normal functioning bowel is disrespectful? Ok...

we try not to fart in front of each other. It’s just something we do & we get the same responses about being uptight. That’s not to say we haven’t heard each other from another room, or one hasn’t slipped out, we do joke about them but generally we try to go to another room to fart if we need to. I agree with the OP on this one!

My husband tries not to fart around me as I don’t like it. He farts in front of our sons and his mates with relish, and vice versa.

I have never once farted in front of him, or anyone else, for that matter. I’m not uptight - I go to the loo with him in the bathroom and also change tampons etc. I just don’t find farting funny or pleasant.

If I didn’t fart around dh or him fart around me we’d have exploded by now!!
I have somewhat of a wind issue as have digestive problems - if a fart arises it has to come out or it’ll be really uncomfortable.
If I’m in ‘polite’ company or at work I’ll go to the loo. Immediate family, it comes out. It’s worse in the evening as well when at home w dh!

Oh yes, I’m a fart walker, it’s great - always get them out in the open - did that near an old man the other day and in my head I ‘blamed’ it on him! I remember as a teen i ran the last bit home from the station after school farting all the way & told my mum when i got in. She also liked to let rip with abandon!!

@DarklingIlisten that’s pretty offensive saying someone who farts a lot is unclean. There could be loads of reasons - diet, medical conditions, predisposed to wind. I have always farted a lot but more so recently w digestive issues. You are very unreasonable and ruder than someone letting rip.

I agree with this. I wish my partner wouldn't do it. It's gross. I never do it.

Oh I really do agree with you! 😆😆. We are a little older than you and have been farting merrily in front of each other for 50 years now. These farting threads are always a real eye opener - I’ve never known anyone who could actually get to the toilet to let rip in time if they needed a fart. It’s a perfectly normal, and funny, bodily function.

It's normal and healthy to fart.