To stop chucking neighbours kids ball back?

[feereroo]

I have had a lot of issues with the neighbours kids since we all moved here.

The kids are 5 and 7.

They are loud, used to trespass all over my property, look into my windows and just generally cause a nuisance until big plant pots went up.

They bang in my door at 8pm in the evening waking my kids up demanding their ball back.

I wanted to remain friendly with the mum and would take delivery of her parcels, do her bin when she was at work/holiday.

I never got a thank you so I stopped doing it.
Her kids used to say “hello” but now they just blank us.

The football has been over the fence a lot of the summer and when I have been able to (have toddlers) I have always thrown it back over the fence.

I have stopped the parcels and bins and now when the ball goes over I am tempted not to throw it back given that they all just blank us now.

The balls are back in the garden again after I threw it back over last night.

AIBU?

Puncture
throw back over

Just chuck them back over it'll be less hassle

Did she really not say "thank you" when you handed her the parcel? She just silently took it?

I'd also like to know what was said when you gave her the parcel. As said, you've been a bit petty, but just throw the ball back, when you get chance. Unless you are planning on moving, why the want for conflict?

Just chuck them back after bedtime - I don't mind usually when if it's persistent I just chuck them all back once a day that's it.
Maybe Mom could invest in a next to keep the balls her side.
On the plus side, schools go back soon 😁

On the last two occasions she has just come to the door, got her parcel and left.

Previously she would say “thank you”.

I am not sure if the delivery driver has mistakenly delivered to me rather than a safe place as she didn’t seem to happy about it.

Well next time she does that, keep it tight in your hands and say "what's the magic word"?

Honestly don't be such a wuss 😀

I think it is reasonable to return the balls in the morning when you are free, but not returning and particularly puncturing a 5 and 7 year old's ball would really damage the relationship with your neighbour.

What relationship?!?!

We get balls regularly from an awful entitled neighbour's kid (the kid is ok, the neighbour parent is the entitled one). I just don't bother throwing them back, they just buy new ones and do it again. Must cost them a fortune. I wouldn't puncture them though, somehow that feels kind of cartoon villain like.

I would just chuck them over as otherwise they are going to be ringing your bell or hammering on your door for them.

My mum had a neighbour like this- the balls were coming over multiple times per day.
She would throw all the balls back over once a week.

I think it's likely to push them to trespass into your garden again - just when you are less likely to see them. They are not going to suddenly appear at your door full of contrition and thanks.

I'd carry on chucking them back, on your own timetable.

The parcel thing is easy.
Next time, when she comes knocking, before you get her parcel, say "you dont seem happy. Would you like me to start saying no to the delivery person when they ask me to take your parcels?"

Odd to take a parcel from your hands and not utter 'thanks'.

But regarding the kids, I'd just tell them not to knock and that you'll return the balls when you can.

Odd to take a parcel from your hands and not utter 'thanks'.

Yep! Hard to believe, is'nt it😉

Just be the bigger person. Why not. It costs you little to do those small things.

Deflate the ball and send it back over.. Once dm gets sick of pumping it up they will be more careful..

I understand that it is really difficult if the neighbours are awful. I do have very nice ones and I do understand that if they kick a ball around, occasionally it will come over. When my DCs were small the same thing happened and our neighbours were always very good.

Just chuck the balls back over, you say you have toddlers. The shoe may well be on the other foot in a few years.

Depends how inconvenient it is. Banging on the door and constant balls is a bloody nuisance. The more you chuck them back the more they seem to come over. Ask me how I know.

YABU

It doesn't take any time or effort to throw the ball over. To keep a five year olds ball would make you petty, rude and pathetic wouldn't it? They might be like that, you don't have to be.

I don't take requests though so I wouldn't pass it back if/when they knock on the door. When I'm out there and I see it though I'll throw it over.

Go round and just say to them politely we don’t mind giving your ball back but do you mind not knocking after xyz time.

I get on really well with my neighbours but wouldn’t touch someone else’s bin.

Refuse delivery of the parcels let someone else deal with it.

I get on really well with my neighbours but wouldn’t touch someone else’s bin.

Not even if you used your hands rather than your tongue?

The trespassing was at the front of the garden, using my drive as a playground on a daily basis and standing all over my flower beds.

They can’t get in through the back as the garden gate is always locked and I am not prepared to have it open for safety and privacy reasons.

The thing is the ball will go over and they will immediately come over (sometimes at 8/9pm) and be banging on the door.

We are actually hoping to move from here before Xmas.

OK, well chucking balls back is a good way to limit the intrusion for a lot of people but that's your call.

Apologies if I misread. Our ex-neighbours' kids used to climb our 6 foot fence panels to get their balls, and they did quite a lot of damage.

😂