To stop chucking neighbours kids ball back?

[feereroo]

I have had a lot of issues with the neighbours kids since we all moved here.

The kids are 5 and 7.

They are loud, used to trespass all over my property, look into my windows and just generally cause a nuisance until big plant pots went up.

They bang in my door at 8pm in the evening waking my kids up demanding their ball back.

I wanted to remain friendly with the mum and would take delivery of her parcels, do her bin when she was at work/holiday.

I never got a thank you so I stopped doing it.
Her kids used to say “hello” but now they just blank us.

The football has been over the fence a lot of the summer and when I have been able to (have toddlers) I have always thrown it back over the fence.

I have stopped the parcels and bins and now when the ball goes over I am tempted not to throw it back given that they all just blank us now.

The balls are back in the garden again after I threw it back over last night.

AIBU?

Those saying "just throw them back" clearly haven't had this problem. I would have 5 balls in my garden, throw them back, and they'd all be back in my garden within the hour. Every time. It gets tedious very quickly.

This is us currently.

kids climb over the fence, damage stuff in our garden. It's constant.

the kids, despite me asking them not to come into the garden, and I will throw over the balls as and when, come in anyway. They are in the garden more than I am. Feel I have no privacy and avoid the garden as it's just not enjoyable.

it's multiple times a day and nothing has stopped it. I wouldn't want to puncture the ball (and not always footballs - hard balls, tennis balls) but I can understand why some would.

Yes it really does! I hate it. When it was occasional it never bothered me, but the sheer number of times it happens is just incredible and the entitlement of expecting them back instantly is something else.

@TenderChicken Yes or their kids are the ones doing it. It’s also going to be an issue when her small children are being pelted by footballs when they play in the garden.

I had students next door and it got to the point I started hiding the balls behind my shed so they couldn’t have them back and couldn’t see them from their upstairs window, threw about 10 back at the end of term but they stopped coming over as much once they realised I had stopped throwing them back anyway

Tell them to talk to a Mr Potter or a Mr Amorim as their football skills are such they might get a game!

Don't puncture the balls, keeping them and throwing back once they are asleep might be an option. Or once the school term starts when it will be less of an issue.

And to people saying doing stuff like that is miserable and petty…. Oh well. I also reported them for having a massive loud party during lockdown. They hated me lol

My son was the one who would accidentally kick his ball over the fence now & again and my rule was to not knock the door & wait for it to be thrown back over when the neighbours had the chance. We have a parking area which borders several gardens & this worked well (he was the only child in our area).

tell them that you will throw any balls back over once a day at 7pm and that if they ring, the balls will stay in your garden until the next day at 7pm.

Then ignore.
Put a sign on the door for deliveries: no parcels for x neighbour

And hope you can move

OP just play the long game, if you think you'll move in the next 4 months just chuck the odd ball back (but no need to rush) obvs stop taking in parcels and taking bin in though if you're not thanked for your trouble. Do whatever you need to, to have the least drama or hassle. But don't go out of your way to help her out. Xx

My kids lose their balls over neighbours fences and in incredibly grateful when they come back. So I’m going to say chuck them back at your convenience.

We ended up not chucking the balls back or answering the door (we would on occasion but not unsociable hours.... the kids actually gave up in the end). Parents would just buy more balls!

How to tell us that you’ve never had daily multiple balls and knocks on door from kids without telling us……🙄

And also laughably hyperbolic

You should probably demand that they stop playing outside altogether and just sit silently inside on the iPad with headphones on so you never have to face the hideous ordeal of hearing the laughter of a child.

🙄

It isn't the laughter of a child that's the problem, is it? It's the whacking, full size and weight football that comes flying over the fence within 2 minutes of them starting to kick it. Try having your year old tree smashed by an unguided missile, not to mention other damage they cause, and then tell me it's all a bit of fun.

It's not difficult to find a lightweight ball that's more suitable for gardens, not to mention the skill level of the average child (which is pretty terrible).

Well it is a crime. Do you support criminal behaviour?

Kids 5&7

how nasty are you?

Why don't you throw them back? Unlesss you're disabled,it's hardly difficult?!

Naaassty

They're 5 &7. You don't think there's a nicer way to deal with it FFS.

Not if you are naaassty like me there isn’t 😆

Clearly

Yup!

I don’t see how people say I am being mean.

Prior to the plant pots being up they would scream right outside my living room window on my own drive.
This will occur multiple times a days waking up my toddlers.

The ball is often thrown over multiple times a day amongst other things which could hit my kids if they are playing in the garden.

The clearly have no consideration for others.
It is also concerning that she allows a 5 year old to play unsupervised (he causes the most trouble).

I shouldn’t have to deal with such nuisance on a daily basis hence why we are now moving.

To the PP saying my kids will be like this in a few years time.

No they won’t.
I will teach my kids manners, respect for other people’s property, and to have consideration.

I never used to behave this way as a kid, as in damaging property and trespasssing onto my neighbours property.

I will just ignore the door bell going now and throw it back once a week.

The mum is supposedly an adult though, have you missed that? She should be managing her own kids, not relying on OP to throw back balls multiple times a day.

Tbh I would put a note through their door saying

Further to the repeated intrusive interruptions to my children’s sleep and the need to get on with my day, I will now only return any balls/toys that land in my garden on a Friday evening. Ie once a week. Please encourage your children to try to keep their toys within your garden and refrain from sending them around to ask for them back in the interim. You may wish to invest in a net or screening (easily and cheaply available on Amazon for example) to limit the number of balls you are loosing. I am afraid I will consider ignoring this request and future intrusive demands on my doorstep to be harassment and will have no choice but to report it.

thank you

We used a tunnel net when my kids played cricket and have always happily tossed balls back to the neighbours when we find them (ie at our convenience) and neighbours reciprocated. No pestering, no banging on doors at all hours. No climbing over fences.