Helping a Desperate Young Woman

[TopSec]

Not really a "AIBU" but I am unsure where to put this for the most traffic and I truly want to help this young family - please stay with me for this long message. The people in question are unable to post this as they don't want to be outed.

I am writing on here to ask if anyone has any advice or experience in being made homeless. | am asking for a very good friends daughter and her 3 children. She was given notice 3 months ago to vacate the house she rents and has done for the last 7 years, both with her ex-partner and latterly, on her own with the children. The Landlord said he was selling it but we suspect because of the new Landlord / Tenant Act which is due but no proof.

She has since been unable to find a private let because they are all asking for a guarantor who has an income of £52,000+, despite having impeccable references. She also has a deposit of around £1500. Unfortunately the Estate Agents have been unable to help her

The LA have been useless, despite making all the right noises - coos and lots of "I'm so sorry" etc but no actual help. She was basically told to sit tight until the bailiffs came because if she does anything else, she was making herself homeless. She can't possibly do this with 3 children as they would be so frightened. She has also had to put all her furniture in storage as the Landlord wants the keys by the weekend and she has had to abide or lose her deposit. What an absolute nonsense piece of advice to give a single mum with 3 children 10 years and under! Even wrote to our MP who just reiterated everything the LA has told her. She has been told she cannot bid for a council house for at least 12 weeks. Her mother is a single lady, (my BF) aged 73, pensioner who only has her pension available to her. She cannot put them up as the LA have said, again, they won't help if she has somewhere to stay, despite the fact that her mother would lose her single occupancy and UC if she allows her daughter and 3 children to stay. The LA said they may put her in a hotel but couldn't tell her where - they said it could be in the next county! These children have school to go to when the new term starts. She could end up in a hotel full of illegal single males on her own with 3 children. How ridiculous

She has dragged herself up over the last few years since her partner left, even starting her own business which is keeping her head above water - for now.

The children's father is refusing to help. They were not married and the money he gave her was not ordered by court order, so a Landlord will not accept this as a guaranteed part of her income. He has now married, taken on 2 step children and, because of this, the CSA have reduced her payments by around £70 PM. (He contacted the CSA when she asked for a little help to find a new property as rents had increased considerably - we know he hasn't be truthful to them but have no proof - he has played a blinder and is now controlling everything.

Her father is no longer in her life

She has to hand over the keys to her present house on Sunday and has no idea what she is going to do. She is scared, frightened and broken. The children are very upset and this is affecting them in ways I won't describe on here. Her mother is beside herself, crying and also broken - this is her daughter and her grandchildren

And yes, I will say it - Illegal Migrants are housed as soon as they arrive in this Country, given all the help and assistance they require - even giving them money and driving lessons, - hotels in Swindon full of them and yet this poor girl is getting no help at all until she is on the streets - and then the most basic of assistance.

If you can help with any advice or if anyone has been through similar and can help with their experiences, then please do let me know. I will print out all responses for her so that she can follow up as many tips as you may have

Thanks for taking the time to read through this. I am so angry

People born and who grew up in the UK don't get the same "privileges" because the government assumes they have a default safety net like having family, friends, relatives, savings, language, education etc.

Exactly.

Nicely done. Faux concern about a possibly real situation to get the reform frothers going.
Excellent work

And yes, I will say it - absolutely no need for your racism. Those seeking asylum are not illegal immigrants. Try getting off the Mail online and educating yourself on these issues.

I've been through this with 3 children too. As everyone else has said, she needs to stay put, the kids can stay with Grandma but like another pp said, I'd keep quiet about that.
I was first put into a hostel for over 6 months, then into temporary accommodation which was a flat and far far better than the hostel. In total it probably took about 2 years for me to be housed.

It has to.go to court before the baliffs come and that will cost the landlord about £2k. He might give her longer. Nothing will happen on Sunday if that's the last day of the notice.

And just imagine being so anti migrants that you'd rather be homeless than share a hotel with them. They don't put them with resident homeless people anyway.

Get her stuff out of storage or the cost will mount up and the kids have no beds

Not sure what you mean when you say the mother would lose her UC if they moved in with her. Her mum is 72 so won't be on UC. The only thing which she would lose is her single occupancy council tax reduction which could easily be reinstated when they move out unless she's disabled and getting pension credit too. Lots of people have to temporarily move in with family.

The migrants would be on the streets without help from the council, and as you stated, when your friend is on the streets, she will get the same help. In the same situation, they get the same help. You have no injustice there to complain about.

The rules that mean people have to wait until the bailiffs come is awful, and is expensive for landlords and tenants. That is the fault of our shitty government and is nothing to do with migrants.

If it’s affecting the children at this stage, then they aren’t being properly protected by their parents.

Having been in that position myself (made homeless) I was fully with you until you had to drag in some nonsense about asylum seekers. Do better.

I thought the same thing. A 73yo pensioner surely can't be on UC and does it really matter if she loses her single occupancy? The DD will be able to contribute and make up the difference. Even if the plan is to stay put and go the homeless route, it's not as desperate as it's being framed if they can actually move in with your best friend, they just doesn't want that for their own reasons.

op you seem to understand that she needs to follow the process in order to get council help. She also needs to understand how long that process will take. That is something she should ask shelter but my understanding is that it will take several months. Someone else has said it could be 18 months.

in addition to the great advice already given I would say she should confirm this. If it will take months then get her stuff out of storage, continue to pay rent and keep looking for a private rental plus get herself on the council lists. She does not need to put her stuff into storage until she receives the notice saying when the bailiffs will come.

Well exactly. No need to bring that into it. I was sympathetic until that paragraph.

i’m sure there are people who would say the same about single mums sponging off the state as well, having kids so they can get homes and benefits.

most people realise it’s a shit situation however you come to it, life happens, whether you find yourself at risk of being disappeared in a war torn country, or have a relationship breakdown and your rental property yanked from beneath you.

where does she live o/p? I’m renting and managed to get a place with a min wage job and no guarantor, I had the deposit, my credit rating was good, keys within a week.

if she has the deposit and an income to pay the rent, why does she need such a high income guarantor? Renting is the norm round here and an income that high would be rare.

Thank you. I .passing all this advice on to her

She lives SW. This is the information given to her by the agents re: the amount the guarantor needs to earn - i agree a crazy amount. She has the deposit and good references. Its just this thats stopping her renting privately. Rents are very high around here but I'm guessing that goes for the rest of the country at the moment

I don't think you are in the real world if you believe the majority of migrants are genuine asylum seekers

If they aren’t they will be refused asylum. But they are entitled to due process.

the issue is more that the process is incredibly slow. People need to stop focussing on “boat people” and start demanding the asylum process is funded and streamlined so anyone not genuine is processed and refused asap, instead of being left in hotels indefinitely while the paperwork is done.

@Coffeetime25 Doesn't that only apply to asylum seekers? Are all migrants asylum seekers? I thought that was a very specific thing.

From Google : There isn't a blanket two-year waiting period for housing, medical care, or education for migrants in the UK, but there are specific rules and waiting periods for different situations. Asylum seekers can get medical care immediately, and can apply to work after waiting 12 months for a decision on their claim. Housing support is available for asylum seekers who are destitute, and education is available to children regardless of immigration status.
For those whose claim is successful, they have full access to work, benefits, and housing. "

Obvs Google could be wrong, it's only as correct as the people writing it make it.

She will be one of loads of people I this situation
Anyone who rents a house has this worry.
She is not alone.

Why should she be high up, there's loads of of people in need waiting too.

She would be a fool to do that, living somewhere safe with a family member will push her way down the priority list. She won't get high up for a council house by being a single mother with children, most of the waiting list is made up of parents with children! She will only be a priority if the council accepts her as homeless, so she has to stay put and wait to be evicted.

Why did she put her stuff in storage? She's not going to be going anywhere anytime soon.

I live near Epping where there are a lot of anxious families who have had migrants from The Bell hotel perving at their daughters. One of whom was indeed sexually assaulted by a fella who'd been in this country for a week. Lots of halo polishing here and I am generally sympathetic to desperate people but let's not pretend that it doesn't happen.
Lots if you clearly familiar with the bailiff process here-this family clearly isn't, give her a break.

If the kids are at someone else’s for the day when the bailiffs come it’s fine! Even one overnight is just a visit. Don’t move them in properly with someone else

This is 100% correct and she must follow this advice.

If I haven't done already, thank you. Getting a little confused as to who I have thanked and who I haven't.