To think girls shouldn’t wear sandals in the park?

[Canyoucreateoneplease]

It’s been a beautiful day here so I was at the park. DS was on the climbing which is huge, designed for older kids, not toddlers.

There were so many girls crying and panicking getting across it because their sandals were getting trapped. Their feet were sliding out of them because of their angles, and their dresses were hindering them.

AIBU to think girls who are going to park should be put in sensible trainers and trousers? The boys were managing with ease because they were suitably dressed. A substantial amount of the girls were struggling because of what they were wearing.

Quite. I never say no you can't play in the park or no you can't wear dresses and sandals. I say you need to dress properly for the activity you're doing, as I do in my day to day activities. I wouldn't do a body pump class in bare feet or sandals - it would be dangerous so I take trainers. I wouldn't go hiking in pumps and a frock - they wouldn't support my feet so I wear walking boots and trousers. As she does. She can wear whatever she wants and then when it's park time, she puts her park clothes and trainers on, which she has pre-empted by packing them in a bag.

I'd say starting a thread on Mumsnet, getting extremely angry with people about it, throwing out "shoulds" all over the place, likening a pair of strappy sandals at the park to corsets, hobble skirts and crinolines, suggesting that a pair of (btw horrible) sandals you've seen on H & M are representative of all girl's sandals and are responsible for the disparities between male and female sport, casting rude aspersions about the intelligence of anyone who disagrees with you, and insisting repeatedly that only your recent experience (which no-one actually believes happened anyway) and not the experience of the many of us who have girls who wear sandals is correct, would fall into the definition of hysterical, yes.

"affected by or deriving from wildly uncontrolled emotion."

I’m so glad you agree! As you said, ‘clothing has been used to control…’ I do wonder though, who exactly was doing the controlling, the judging, the telling women they should or shouldn’t, that they must follow rules regardless of their own feelings, because someone else always knows better? 🤔 Unless the fabric was springing into action of its own accord 😨

Anyway, as riveting as this sandal symposium has been, I’ll leave you to guard the gates of girlhood and preach about oppressive clothing while making sweeping judgements about parents and girls who don’t do or wear what you think they should. Seems to mean a lot to you.

No idea what body pump is, but you might like to pop into Liverpool town centre at 3am one night and see how the women there manage a night out.

Last time I went out in heels and a dress I managed 22,000 steps and doubled by calorie burn in comparison to my BMR, so I wouldn't say it slowed me down.

It's certainly more exercise than I did the next day in leggings and a t-shirt.

@Swiftie1878 in my experience I’ve had an 11 yr old want to ride a mountain bike around London zone 2 in flip flops, no he didn’t get to have autonomy. Same with a piss soaked toddler who I was babysitting and only wanted his mummy to change him. My adult brain says I should ask child for consent (3 yo) but also is it ethical to leave him in piss soaked trousers? Difficult and tricky but sometimes you have to override

Never in all my years of parenting have I noticed a “substantial” number of girls at the park struggling with their footwear. Seriously, how many is “substantial”? Because this just does not ring true

Kinda want my toddler to do the Niki Minaj pose in her dress and sandles right at the top of the climbing frame for this woman to see now lol

This is why women can no longer run in heels!

In general, I don't dress my DDs (8 and 6) in clothes that will hinder their movement.

If I knew I was going to the park, I would plan for trainers and shorts/leggings. If we were going out to dinner, they are free to pick their clothes.

I actively encourage my children to chose better outfits if they are going to parties. If it is an active party with a bouncy castle, I always make sure they are dressed appropriately. If it was a Lush party, they could wear what they like.

My DDs also wear "boys" shoes for school as they actually keep their feet dry and warm, unlike the crappy "girls" ones that are open toe and completely unsupportive.

I've never seen an open toe school shoe. Most schools don't allow them. Something to do with insurance about things potentially falling on toes I believe. I wore sandals with open toes in the 90s.

Yes and those annoying parents who say 'isn't he cold' when it's 15 degrees and they don't want to wear a jumper 😂. Why don't people mind their own business.

😁

It’s pure 🧇 of the highest order

As a childminder I always requested that girls had substantial shoes on.
over the summer I used to get all sorts of flip flops / jelly shoes / crocs. I ended up buying a selection of kids trainers so that they didn’t fall and hurt themselves trying to run in crocs.
I had a school age child (6/7) whose mum never listened even though coming in strappy sandals or flip flops and frilly dresses was hindering her. She couldn’t join in picking blackberries as her arms and feet were being prickled, she couldn’t run with the other kids without falling.

Are they?
Don’t you reckon they are not really appropriate to climb, run, playing football or go on bikes?
why is it different if a boy wears them? Why you think a boy is more capable of making choices for himself, but girls should be told by their parents what shoes are appropriate?
This starts to sound really really misogynistic.

If the problem is Shoes, that it should apply to both sexes. Flip flops are as inappropriate as flimsy sandals. For both girls and boys.

If the problem is what is appropriate for girls to wear then the problem is the way you see girls.

https://www.clarks.com/en-gb/finja-gem-older/26180830-p - for girls

https://www.clarks.com/en-gb/feather-shine-kid/26184026-p - for boys

You can see how the feet of the child wearing the girls shoes would be colder, wetter and less supported than the children wearing the boys shoes. The support underneath, the support around the ankles, the thickness of the shoe.

Op your lovely and sensible boys will one day turn 13 and shuffle around in nike sliders. 😂

I’ve never seen open tied girls school shoes, there are lots of very fashionable, sensible shoes for girls for school - I know because my daughter wears them (and still does, the curse of having tiny feet. She also happily wore dresses and sandals to the park - it never slowed her down in the slightest.

Both boys and girls should wear appropriate clothing for the activity or they are being put at a disadvantage. Shame it mostly happens to girls though.

Maybe it was an unplanned stop? Maybe you should mind your own buisness

My daughter would absolutely go to the park in sandals and has always managed. The park is rarely the destination and somewhere we will stop while we are out or on the way home.

I dislike trainers dont get the over the top adoration for them on mn.

Often found they got kicked off as kids were too hot in them too .

Shoes that stays on the feet are preferable for climbing but sandals like that exists

Cripes, some people are very defensive about girls’ right to wear sandals! Sturdy outdoor/ hiking sandals that strap properly round the foot and have a decent sole, I'd imagine, are fine for things like climbing, but those that are very flat/thin-soled and have flimsier/thinner straps are probably not going to work so well.

I agree with your general point. As a lady in her sixties who loves high heels I do wonder why people feel the need to judge. This week in m and s “those shoes will damage your feet”. Interesting as my feet are very good, no deformities, nice arch, can tie bows and write with them. I have no problems with foot, knee, hip, back or neck pain and no issues with my tendo achilles, I am toned and have very good posture and balance. I dance in heels, without them I swim, cycle, weight train and walk long distances. For my party piece I will walk on stilts wearing heeled shoes. I never wear foot wear inside, on the beach or in my garden. In the sixties and seventies sandals where our only summer option. Girls did everything the boys did. There is a body of research suggesting that trainers can be bad for feet. Parents seem to be judged by others for anything they do these days even when taking kids to the park.

I agree that some girls wear is rather restrictive and that can be annoying annoying but some people are rather obsessed with what they consider to be the ‘correct’ equipment and seem to think we will all turn an ankle and impale our foot on a stick if we don’t wear hiking boots to stroll across a field.