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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have shouted at the woman who told me I should move from a disabled bay?

96 replies

MABS · 29/05/2008 14:27

Am totally livid at this moment,just wondered if you agree with me tho? Have never ever started an aibu thread before.

Parked at Sainsburys in disabled bay, blue badge clearly on windscreen,disabled ds and dd too in back of car.

I got out of driver's door, walked to boot of car to get my handbag out, to be greeted my a torrent of abuse from a woman on crutches in next car.

I explained I was about to unload disabled ds, but she went off on one totally about how i should be parked in Parent and Toddlers as i had kids with me. I said again he was disabled, she then shouted that i should still be parked in M&T!

At that point, afraid i lost it and shouted at her big time to mind her own bloody business and get her facts straight next time. oops

OP posts:
Miggsie · 29/05/2008 21:39

Send the old bat down to Wickes in Twickenham, she would have a field day, all the REALLY disabled builders in the disabled bays loading their vans with plaster/cement/wood etc.
I feel like belting them with my walking stick most days.

cheesesarnie · 29/05/2008 21:39

id be very and !yanbu!!!

Original poster
MABS · 29/05/2008 21:49

oh i wish i were nearer miggsie!

OP posts:
Piffle · 29/05/2008 21:54

I've been told to hop it from p&t parking when lady in next car spied my blue badge for dd in the door. Disabled parking was quite full and as dd has visual rather than mobilty issues I decided to leave disabled bays for less mobile customers.
what a palaver, I'm afraid I swore, quite audibly, and me, with two small children...

CilC · 29/05/2008 22:07

My mother has MS and I experienced the same thing one day when I drove her to the shops. They obviously saw me get out of the car before Mum.

I have no problem if people enquire, but to assume and be extremely rude is just not on! I gave her such a mouthful I think even now 5 years later she has not forgotten.

I have SPD at the moment and am 8 months pregnant. A few weeks ago I parked in parents parking without DD. I just could not walk any further...a lady said something to me. I just pointed to my belly and said I am parent and child, the sign does not mention the child must be born. She laughed and agreed with me! Still I thought it was quite nosey of her...

CilC · 29/05/2008 22:09

Miggsie - the person who had a go at me about Parent/child parking was at M&S Teddington - it wasn't you by chance coming home from Wickes?? [smile)

CilC · 29/05/2008 22:10
Smile
PeachyWontLieToYou · 29/05/2008 22:16

oliveoil have you pinted out to your dh that lots of people remove their childseats to clip onto a chassis, that might stop him?

obv we don't have a blue badge but we have had comments over toilets (now ds3 is training we need access sharpish, and i can neither get ds1 into a girls loo nor trust him unaccompanied- both registered disabled). it hurt lots at first bit of late i find ive given up caring.

mabs yanbu.

eidsvold · 29/05/2008 22:21

not in the least. Totally NBU!

I have dd1 who has a red badge which here in Aus means we can park in any off street disabled parking bays. I watched an old lady nearly knock herself out walking into a pole staring at my car to see if I had a badge.

I get sick to death of the tsks and the stares when I get out with dd1 who can walk. I have lost count of the number of times I have watched people blatantly walk around my car or stand to see if I have a badge displayed - including parents at dd1's mainstream school ( but that is a whole other story).

If I had been in your place MABS I would have wanted to rip her head off. I think the look on my faces suggests that and so far no one has verbally challenged me.

ellymae · 29/05/2008 22:40

I read on another forum recently about some of the problems that people (who to the outside world have no obvious 'disabilities' ) have with using disabled parking bays. One person had the comment made to them 'well you don't look disabled' to which they replied 'well you don't look ignorant but then appearances can be deceptive'.

Apparently it worked a treat!

TinkerbellesMum · 29/05/2008 23:11

CilC it's my understanding (my sister met her DH when they were both employed by Tesco) that pregnant women can use those spaces too because they need the space to get out of the car because of their bump.

misdee · 29/05/2008 23:16

when dh gets back to the car he needs a cuple of minutes to rest and get his breath back. the looks he gets for daring to sit there and not drive off straight away so i make a fuss of strapping all the kids in, and putting the buggy away, so he can rest before he moves off.

megandtyler · 29/05/2008 23:28

my mil has a blue badge and as she dosen't drive she carries it with her and if she is with us we park in disabled spaces. we haven't incurred any wrath yet but as she can walk i'm sure we will.
Some people are so stupid a disability dosen't have to be visable.
totally not unreasonable

handlemecarefully · 29/05/2008 23:35

YANBU - what a nutter eh?

Original poster
MABS · 30/05/2008 08:27

reckon i will go and have a look today,see if she still parked there

OP posts:
CilC · 30/05/2008 08:29

Thanks Tinkerbellesmum! Good to know I was in the right and did not actually even know it!

StealthPolarBear · 30/05/2008 08:45

Fantastic responses from mrsleroy and ellymae - I'm going to use them to rude people in future!
OP yanbu - but I think you know that by now She was an idiot and still will be long after you and your DD have forgotten all about this incident

LMAsMummy · 30/05/2008 10:28

What a cow, we had a similar with dd1 at Kew Gardens with an elderly couple. I shouted too, so I do not (cannot!) think you unreasonable! This really hacks me off.

deepbreath · 30/05/2008 14:14

YANBU. I've been glared at and muttered about by elderly people (with no blue badge, I hasten to add) when I've parked in blue badge parking bays when I've been out with dd, who is a blue badge holder.

At our local shopping centre, a van pulled up so close to the back of my car trying to intimidate me to move out of the disabled space. I got several hand signals that aren't in the Highway Code, and he waved a blue badge at me. When he saw me lift dd out of the car, he went into a strop and reversed at speed into another car...

cupsoftea · 30/05/2008 14:16

yanbu - how awful for you & kids. I'd have shouted right at her to mind her own business.

Doobydoo · 30/05/2008 14:18

You are most definitely not unreasonable.How awful for you.Horrid woman doing that to you

posieparker · 30/05/2008 14:19

MABS, you shoul have used one of her crutches to drive your point home and then asked her to carry you dc around the supermarket.
YANBU

Youcannotbeserious · 30/05/2008 14:20

YANBU.

She deserved a piece of your mind!!!!

CarGirl · 30/05/2008 14:24

deepbreath - that sounds priceless, so wish I'd beent there.

I wonder if some of the blue badge rage is because it was well known that there are many fraudulant ones in circulation?

morninggirl · 30/05/2008 14:26

definitely not unreasonable.
you have very right to park there as well.

stupid woman.