Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To find this so rude and awkward?

111 replies

Mightymaniac1 · 10/08/2025 11:44

Would love some other opinions as it’s one of those times where I feel it makes my parents look bad- so I feel I can’t speak to anyone about it in real life!

Currently living with my parents for a short period before moving back into our house in the next week. They have been renovating their house which is in a lovely cul de sac. Think beautiful houses which are all very neatly kept with their grass etc.

They are away on holiday at the moment and my myself and my partner have been staying at their house. Their elderly parent has been very unwell so we have been visiting daily and my partner has helped me picking up drugs and administering it to my grandparent- this is adding a little bit to my frustration of the situation which is why I am adding it as a detail… bear with me!

Today there is a communal party being held at the grass square of the cul de sac they live at. Whilst being abroad (and whilst he has been helping me and looking after the house) my parents have texted me asking me to get my partner to move his work van off their drive way and to another lane. Presumably so it doesn’t ’spoil the look’ of their driveway on this garden party day.

so… AIBU to find this completely ridiculous and rude? Bear in mind said van has been most gratefully used to:
-pick up furniture for them recently
-house tools to do various works around the house for them

It feels as though they are embarrassed to have a van on their drive… they have had several vans on their drive way whilst their house was being renovated. I felt absolutely awful asking my fiance to hide his van down the road when he has not only been helping me with the emotional load of poorly grandparents but also lots of help for my parents to renovate this house.

I don’t want to fall out with them and would love to see another perspective which I genuinely hope I’m missing!

Thank you in advance for reading. :(

I do not give permission for this to be circulated on any news sites.

OP posts:
YabbaDabbaDooooo · 10/08/2025 13:20

Shinyandnew1 · 10/08/2025 13:12

I do not give permission for this to be circulated on any news sites.

😂 really?!

Why have you decided to live at your parents while they are renovating?! I can imagine that extra house guests is the last thing they need in that situation?!

They've let you stay there for whatever reason, you need to move the van!

I do not give permission for this to be circulated on any news sites.

Oh bloody hell, I missed that! 🤣🤣

AliceMaforethought · 10/08/2025 13:21

ThinWomansBrain · 10/08/2025 12:38

If you're that offended, stop accepting their hospitality, go stay at a hotel and pay them market rent for the time you've been there to date.

I think that OP is overreacting a bit, but this isn't accurate. You could then say that the parents could pay for carers for the grandparents, and pay for people to work on their house. It isn't a case of the OP and her partner freeloading on her parents.

tuvamoodyson · 10/08/2025 13:26
Come On What GIF by MOODMAN

You felt awful asking him to move his van?

DiscoBob · 10/08/2025 13:33

I think it would have to be an extremely slow news day for the to pick up your story. And if you posted it here then they don't need your consent

PestoHoliday · 10/08/2025 13:36

Drama llama. Just move the van.

And stop being weird about your grandparent.

BreatheAndFocus · 10/08/2025 13:36

You’re staying with your parents, they’re allowing your partner to visit and stay too - and they’ve asked you to do a tiny favour for them and their neighbours?

YABVU, ungrateful and self-centred. Just move the van fffs! It’s not like they’re asking you to dismantle it screw by screw and re-assemble it at the top of the Eiffel Tower is it? Why you think your parents have done anything wrong is beyond me!

Theunamedcat · 10/08/2025 13:37

Ahh a drop and run perfect for the daily mail....

Bellyblueboy · 10/08/2025 13:38

Let’s be honest, work vans don’t look nice in residential areas. That’s why some areas have rules against them.

just move the van for the party. You are being over sensitive to a fairly universal opinion.

WimpoleHat · 10/08/2025 13:39

I bet they’ve had a text from one of the neighbours asking if they’d get the van moved. Doesn’t sound like the sort of thing that would occur to someone on holiday and not there! If I’m right, I’d do it for the sake of your parents’ relationships with their neighbours. It’s not necessarily a snobby thing; if it’s a street party, they may usually put tables on drives etc and hadn’t factored in the fact that you and your DP would be there (with a van). Presumably it was a polite request for a reason? If so, you should accede to it, especially as it isn’t really much hassle for you.

AuntyDepressant · 10/08/2025 13:44

Well I can’t see the problem with the van being left on the drive. I’m assuming the street party isn’t going to be held on the driveway?

GreenBookshelves · 10/08/2025 13:46

Read through the whole first post expecting something interesting or dramatic to happen.

The best part was that the OP actually believes that her “story” is remotely newsworthy.

Grammarnut · 10/08/2025 13:48

I wouldn't move the van. It's just a party on the grass.

TheRealGoose · 10/08/2025 13:48

Sorry op, couldn’t get worked up about this and don’t find it remotely rude or awkward, they are not saying he can never park there, just move it for the party, which is fair enough, and I’m not sure helping your grandparents justifies your reaction,

TheRealGoose · 10/08/2025 13:50

I do not give permission for this to be circulated on any news sites

oh op, I missed this, my toes curled, no one is going to print a story as your parents asked you to do them a favour and have the van moved during the party, 😂

JackKillianthenighthawk · 10/08/2025 13:50

I think the poster above me has nailed it, someone has contacted your parents and has asked for the van to be moved so if you don't move it it may reflect badly on your parents so I'd probably just move it if it was me.
I would be unhappy and totally understand though - I'd be put out by this request too. It's a bit snooty of the neighbours presuming it did come from them. This does happen in more affluent areas as I've experienced it myself.

whitewineandsun · 10/08/2025 13:53

It's moving a van, not paying their mortgage! Take a breath. You're in their house.

whitewineandsun · 10/08/2025 13:56

I do not give permission for this to be circulated on any news sites

Oh, OP. It's not for you to give permission. Mumsnet owns your posts. They're not even deleted if you dereg. And this is a public forum crawling with lazy journalists.

queenMab99 · 10/08/2025 13:57

It is rude of them, I wouldn't move it, I would pretend I hadn't seen the message. How snobbish!

chaosmaker · 10/08/2025 13:57

Bearbookagainandagain · 10/08/2025 11:58

Most of us in the street move our cars over to the next road when there is a street party. Because the kids play around, and it's just nice to have less cars on that day.

It could have nothing to do with the van.

it's on the driveway, not in the road.....

@Mightymaniac1 i think they are making an unneccessary fuss over nothing.... I'd probably leave it there and not inconvenience people in another street who probably don't have enough parking.

WeekendFreedom · 10/08/2025 13:57

Hello, my name is Keira and I work for Daily Mail. What luck I came across your story today!! It will make for an excellent article to feature in one of next weeks papers. It would be amazing if I could send someone to get some photos of the van and the street party when it’s ongoing?

MoveOverToTheSea · 10/08/2025 13:59

BreatheAndFocus · 10/08/2025 13:36

You’re staying with your parents, they’re allowing your partner to visit and stay too - and they’ve asked you to do a tiny favour for them and their neighbours?

YABVU, ungrateful and self-centred. Just move the van fffs! It’s not like they’re asking you to dismantle it screw by screw and re-assemble it at the top of the Eiffel Tower is it? Why you think your parents have done anything wrong is beyond me!

They’re ALLOWING their son in law to stay at their house?!?

What sort of relationship do you have with your parents and ILs? 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫

notacooldad · 10/08/2025 14:03

I'd send a message back to your parents saying ' no problem ' and move it.
Seriously its a small request, why make life hard work..
Could you have not done that without making a mountain out if a mole hill and come on her complaint about it.

Bear in mind said van has been most gratefully used to:
-pick up furniture for them recently
-house tools to do various works around the house for them
So what? Grow up.

It is rude of them, I wouldn't move it, I would pretend I hadn't seen the message. How snobbish
Its a small request. The van wouldn't be there if there weren't allowing the son in law to stay.
Why be awkward 😕

Shinyandnew1 · 10/08/2025 14:12

Did you explain why you and your partner are living at your parents' house when they are renovating it?

Why aren't you living in your own house?!

whitewineandsun · 10/08/2025 14:17

Shinyandnew1 · 10/08/2025 14:12

Did you explain why you and your partner are living at your parents' house when they are renovating it?

Why aren't you living in your own house?!

She said they're waiting to move into one.

NotTheHair · 10/08/2025 14:17

WeekendFreedom · 10/08/2025 13:57

Hello, my name is Keira and I work for Daily Mail. What luck I came across your story today!! It will make for an excellent article to feature in one of next weeks papers. It would be amazing if I could send someone to get some photos of the van and the street party when it’s ongoing?

I'm from Hello magazine and I'll fight you for this story. It's absolute dynamite!
Exclusive rights please OP! I'll pay you in Snowflake bars.

Swipe left for the next trending thread