To be so sick of being broke?

[PrincessC0nsuelaBananaHammock]

This is pretty much just a moan really. I'm already doing everything I can to try and improve our situation financially. Although nothing's working atm. 😑

Both DH and I work full-time, on minimum wage. Me 45 hours per week, him between 40-50 depending on the week. And we still can't make ends meet. I'm talking having about £50 left in the bank 2 days after payday because all the bills have come out.

Not entitled to any benefits as earn too much for UC (on MW? 😐). Kids are grown up (22 and 18) but still living at home. DD1 is in college and on UC and waiting to see if she's entitled to PIP for her autism. DD2 is starting uni next month and works part-time herself.

I'm just so fucking sick of the cost of everything. To the point I'm questioning whether I can afford to buy a £6 pack of Benadryl for my fucking hayfever! 😡

Applying for multiple better-paying jobs every week and getting bloody nowhere! Urgh.

Yeah OP
You're skint, you can't afford sarcasm you feckless wench

I don’t really see how this is helpful? Telling someone you have it better than me so don’t moan. It’s all relative isn’t it, you’re making a choice to give up work to care for your parents. Which is very noble and kind, and unpaid carers save the country millions. But if you wanted to you could ask for social care to take over and go back to working full time so that you can have those luxuries again. It’s not really fair to come on here and suggest that OP is being unreasonable for moaning just because you’ve made the choice not to work.

Accepting a situation that one finds oneself in is not martyrdom, its pragmatism.

What on earth good would moaning do?

What good has it done you? None. None whatsoever.

Anyway OP, hopefully some of the (unwanted) good advice you’ve had has been helpful and you’ve had an evenings diversion from the norm by arguing with strangers on the internet! At least that’s free eh? 😂

Having a good moan can make you feel better about something you don’t feel you can change. That’s just human. What are you getting out of trying to put OP down?

I made a choice?! HAHA!! Believe me, I had no choice.

Tell the other unpaid carers in the UK that they "made a choice" to not stay in paid work and see how far you get!

Wow, actually properly laughing hard at that!

I have friends on MJ and they have lost so much of their appetite that they are saving far more of the cost of the injections on their food bill. It takes a few weeks to get to that stage, perhaps it will happen for you?

another idea is to upload your shopping receipts to ChatGPT and ask it to identify savings and make a meal plan for you based on what you already buy.

You are actually doing really well OP. Paying for everything and paying down debt. Once the debt is gone you’ll be quids in! Keep at it.

if you do manage to get a GP appointment consider if a prescription pre payment certificate will save you money.

and/or trial the cheaper brand alternatives from shops. If you find one that suits you can buy it in bulk from Amazon. I do that with my cetirizine. It’s safe to take 2 of those a day, so perhaps you could even trial that? It has to be better than suffering from all your symptoms for the want of a Benadryl?

Great idea, promote benefit fraud. I’m sure hard working people love this suggestion 😡

Sorry I haven’t read all your thread but just wondered if you had thought of using a food bank. Some of my relatives have started to use one as they are struggling financially even though they work. The cost of food is getting beyond a joke.

Well it is though isn’t it. Unless you’re not in the UK? If you parents need 24 hour care then the local authority have a duty to provide it. Maybe you are able to provide a better level of care and are happy to make a sacrifice, but I still can’t see how it’s not a choice?

But if they live in a house with earning adults?

This is why it’s worth reading atleast the OPs posts sometimes. She doesn’t need a food bank

I am not putting her down, merely pointing out that actually the OP is far from "broke" and that she is doing a hell of a lot better than many. Simply reframing thinking on issues like this, I had to when I went from a reasonably high income to next to nothing, can really help. Yes its bad but it could be worse.

That she has prioritised unneccessary purchases over having more than £50 left once the bills go out, is her choice and her responsibility.

Seems like she wants all the nice things AND the money in the bank that she needs to spend on them. Dictionary definition of wanting to have her cake and eat it too.

But everything is a choice, isn't it? No one forced you to give up work.

Urgh OP you should have never posted your expenses. Now they are nitpicking on standard costs and claiming if you basically did nothing but eat tesco value bread, entertain yourselves with a brick wall and walk everywhere your finances would be fine.

If you had said were on a salary 3x more or over that and said you were struggling the blame would be on the current economy and posters would (rightly) argue that you should be able to afford holidays, etc.

Exactly! I do actually feel better since starting this thread, some of the posts have really made me laugh. 😂

Yes, yes you are putting her down.

Well yeah, I'm working my fucking arse off! Of course I want my cake and to eat too!

Then I envy you, genuinely. Because that means that you have never encountered the Kafka-esque nightmare that is the social care system.

When you have a deafblind father and a mother with uncontrolled epilepsy who are in old age but "dont meet the criteria" for social care, what choice do you have? Leave them to it?

But this woman isn’t struggling that much - she already spends £850 per month of groceries, £100 on mounjaro, gym memberships, expensive internet (that you can get cheaper)………she’s buying luxuries. Foodbanks are for people who are genuinely struggling……she’s buying luxuries - she’s doesn’t want to cut back on anything

Honestly the lack of empathy and acknowledgment that not everyone will choose the same path through a problem as others is astounding.
There are deffo savings/changes that ‘could’ be made. Some I personally definitely would make.
The fact that the OP is choosing a slower repayment schedule than I would so as not to charge her kids or give up her jabs or reduce her food budget etc is just as valid a choice as mine.
she’s a grown adult. Her choice has consequences- debt will last longer. My choice would also have consequences- which the OP has knowingly decided is a less good choice for her

On a side note if DD1 attends college, I'm assuming they went to school? Why were you a full time carer for 20 years?

Good question.

Where I live £165 a month for the 10 plan is Band A council tax. Your employer is breaking the law making you work through your breaks as you are working under NMW.
I don’t think 4 adults and households items and pets for £800 a month is that bad! I would be asking my adult children to pay their own mobile bills and help with some of the food costs.

Admittedly I haven’t read the whole thread but why on earth would OP take money from DD2 who is presumably saving for uni? I am a single mum to 4 DC. The COL is a nightmare, I also have debts that are now on me due to a marriage breakdown. I have a DD19 who is just going into her second year at uni. She works like mad in every holiday (think 60 hours every week) to be able to afford it. There is no way I would jeopardise her future.

The quality of life we get for our £ is something like a third less than 15 years ago. The things that could be afforded on two minimum wages just aren’t anywhere near the same - that is a tight amount of money to get a good quality of life from (which for me includes a car and all that it comes with, a hobby, TV and an occasional UK break away). Of course there are bits around the edges you could do, but ultimately it’s shit. Most people’s quality of life and comfort is being quietly eroded. We’ve got to get this country sorted between us.