social media is convincing all our kids they are nd?

[AuntMarch]

I've just been sat on the bus and the tiktok videos I'm hearing almost have me seeking a diagnosis.
"ADHD TEST" Put a finger down if you've ever focused on something so much you've lost track of time/ sometimes think you talk too much or not enough.."
it's basically covered every possible behaviour and it's video after video.

it's no wonder every kid thinks they have something.

It’s not just kids. I’m mid 40s so many of my friends are now convinced they have ADHD.

One is obsessed with trying to convince me I am too, “you do X Y and Z!” Yes, but so do most people, it’s completely bloody normal.

Yep and adults

Coming here to say the same. Two women in my work have recently told they are now diagnosed with ADHD, my best friend has been told by her therapist she has signs of ADHD. Seems like every second woman in their 30ies and their 40ies has symptoms now (including me!).

I agree it does real neurodivergence a huge disservice. The fact remains though that there is a far higher number of people who are ND than are actually diagnosed.

Agree. It's gone way too far. What will the long term impact be on these kids being convinced they can't do x,y or z because they have ADHD? Ludicrous.

It’s algorithms. The more you watch that kind of video, the more it feeds you that kind of video and the drip, drip effect slowly tries to brainwash you into that kind of thinking.

ASD too - when I trained to teach children with ASD years ago, one of the first thing we were taught was "When you learn about autism, expect to recognise yourself in a lot of it, and to start to wonder if you have it too - don't worry, that is a normal response and will wear off in time" - except these days a whole industry has sprung up around NOT letting it wear off

I just saw a video earlier today saying that if you got straight As in your exams it points to autism and ADHD. I feel like popular culture is eroding import aspects of recognising neuro divergence and making it seem like some things in isolation point to it. For example being bright, or being socially awkward. Combined with a reduction in critical thinking in the online world I think a whole lot of people are becoming convinced it's the 'reason' they have any difficulties. It's great when it's helpful and people who are undiagnosed can relate and see themselves in other ND people but I think we've gone beyond that. Even on here you see people suggesting neuro divergence based on one post of completely typical but, for lack of a better phrase, 'not perfect' child behaviour.

if i was younger i could easily have been convinced just by what I overheard on a 25 minute journey today. As it is I'm almost 40 and have got through life without struggles so far.
I want to be clear I'm not dismissing actual nd here, just think its being belittled and some of our kids are being spoonfed excuses not to do anything challenging!

"Neurodiversity" in itself is purely a social media invention, it has no formal scientific or medical definition

Social bloody media and its effect upon those who are lacking in the depth of critical thinking has me more concerned.
My daughters and I are diagnosed with Autism and ADHD. One daughter will likely never be able to live independently due to her care needs, so I live the reality of differing care needs.
Thus, I somewhat feel that anyone beguiled by TikTok might just actually be really fucking stupid.
HTH.

It's a helpful social shorthand as we all know what it means.

And, it's Neurodivergence, not Neurodiversity.

I'm inclined to agree tbh, despite having a child and partner who are genuinely diagnosed with ASD/ADHD.

The difference between my 45 yr old brother (whose life has been severely impacted by ADHD but was only formally diagnosed last year after waiting 4 years for an NHS assessment), and the 40 odd yr old women I know who are getting private diagnoses and ADHD meds within months because they're scatty and get bored easily in a job...well it's indescribable.

These women have married, raised children, learned to drive, had jobs, bought houses, got friends, do their taxes - basically they run their lives competently. Whereas DB's life has been completely ruined by his inability to focus and concentrate. He's been in prison because of it. He can't drive because of it. He is completely unemployable because of it. He can't maintain relationships because of it. He can't handle his own life admin, he can't keep hold of a phone, he can't maintain a tenancy, you name it he struggles with it. He is truly and genuinely impaired in pretty much every area of his life, but he is still unmedicated because the waiting list for medication titration (even post diagnosis) in his area runs to years.

It's not the same thing at all. Thank fuck times have moved on enough that my ASD/ADHD child was diagnosed as an actual child and, alongside his special school, have been able to invest a lot of time and resources into teaching him coping strategies so that the impact on his adult life will hopefully be lessened. His presentation and needs are pretty much the same as DB was as a child but the difference is I know what I'm dealing with and are putting all the support in now to give him a much better chance at a happy and successful life. So I'm not against diagnosis at all, I just get irritated by people who don't really appear to be impaired by the traits they feel they have trying to make out they're in the same boat as people like DB and DS!!

Its not helpful, it has no specific meaning, and it means different things to different people. I am dyslexic, for example. Around 50% of people class that as neurodiversity, and 50% don't. I don't. I say I am not neurodiverse, then days/weeks/months later I mention struggling with something because I am dyslexic, and get all sorts of unhelpful and sceptical responses.

It either/both/neither

It one for some people, one for others, both for some, and some don't use either term.

There is no definition of either, there is no right or wrong way to use either, as neither actually has any specific meaning

Both of them are stupid social media terms and neither have any particular meaning.

I'd go as far as saying I think 50% of the population are ND and ND is in fact normal.

It's called being HUMAN. It always has been that way, but people just learned to get on with their lives rather than looking for excuses and today's obsession with needing a label.

I have ADHD/ASD, but I don't let that stop me. I am aware I can annoy people as I often see things differently and will question things, and although I lose everything and struggle with lots of stuff, and my brain never switches off, I am also super good at other things (learning languages, music, maths etc...) so it's all swings and roundabouts.

Not just social media but the benefits system too. When you can get a mobility car when you’ve got a diagnosis and start driving at 16 there’s 2 big incentives right there. And yes I do know someone who had a brand new luxury brand car because of diagnosis. Not saying they aren’t autistic but pointing out that for some the money will be an incentive

Social media is also responsible for making so many people believe they suffer from 'anxiety' because they get a bit anxious from time to time, as most humans do.

This perfectly describes all the women I know who have been diagnosed in their 40s (5 of them and I don’t know many people).

All of them have been “successful” in life. Now it’s all excuses about this and that because of their ADHD, even though they are medicated. I’m sick of hearing, “sorry I’m late, it’s my ADHD brain!”

I totally agree with you, serious disabilities are being completely trivialised by this epidemic of diagnosis.

People with these mild/unnoticeable forms of ASD and ADHD really need a different name that describes them, so it is clear what is meant when people use words that mean an actual disability

Yes!! And all of them are pretty fucking snooty about people like DB who are messy and poorly presented and self medicate with drink/drugs and have never managed to hold down a job - but that the reality of being severely impacted by ADHD and not being able to access the right support/medication. Just the fact that these women can afford to pay for it shows that they're already doing a lot better than someone like DB...

As a teacher, we no longer use the official diagnosis in the classroom, as almost by definition, having an official diagnosis of ADHD means you are less likely to be disabled by it. These days it really most likely means affluent and pushy mother.

Whereas the children genuinely disabled by ADHD (which is partly environmental) are less likely to have a mother with the time, money and inclination to get a diagnosis

This is part of the reason schools go by need in the classroom, when allocating support and resources, rather than official diagnosis

When everyone is ND it will no longer be special, and they will move on to something else. See also anxiety and depression, sexual orientation, anything that makes you "different".

Secondary schools are particularly bad for this group behaviour.

It's awful, because it diminishes the group who really truly struggle with these issues and then can't access the help they need.

Its not just in relation to ND though is it, its almost every human experience or emotion

A small snapshot of this is on another thread, not sure if its still running and probably was a fake thread, about a child getting momentarily stuck in a water slide at a water park

The responses from posters about children 'feeling safe' and being traumatised by this, the mother being traumatised, the child being in distress, the child crying, not doing things which cause discomfort....

Show that parenting has changed over the years to ensure that a child is never hungry, never uncomfortable, never upset, never bored and this isnt normal, it doesnt give anyone a chance to learn how to navigate normal human experience. We are teaching children that they are not 'safe', that they are depressed or anxious as a disorder, not just a fleeting feeling. We feed them snacks all the live long day for fear of a rumbling tummy before dinner. We are teaching children that 'this isnt comfortable for me' = Im not going to do it for fear of experiencing that discomfort.