To delete this comment on FB about alcohol

[Frustratedfifty]

DH and I went out last night. I took a photo of him in a wine bar and it was a really nice pic so I posted it on FB. Got the usual likes and a few comments about how he never ages (he doesn’t - annoying haha). One of my aunties commented ‘you two drinking again!’

This isn’t the first time she’s said something like this. For context we drink alcohol once or twice a week and I’m not someone who posts a lot about drinking. I post on SM a couple of times a month - mostly walks we’ve gone on, concerts or sport. She never comments on those - only when alcohol is visible or we are in a bar.

My aunty has given up drinking a while ago for health reasons (was told she had to). Prior to that she drank a bottle of wine every night for decades. So the hypocrisy is wild!

I’ve hidden the comment but apparently the person and their friends can still see it so my whole family basically. I know my mum will be upset about it. AIBU to delete it?

She's embarrassing herself by making a point of commenting on your very low alcohol intake. it probably bothers her that she's massively abused it in the past to the point that she is now unable to enjoy it herself without it having a huge effect on her health. If family members are noticing her sly digs they're probably privately laughing at the sheer hypocrisy of her unwanted comments

yep. We sure are. Not everyone has an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. A couple of drinks now and then is fantastic fun for us and many others

Yep, do this... if you want to seem completely batshit.

Most of the "witty" responses suggested on this thread just come across as overly defensive and hyper-sensitive. Hey comment is best ignored as surely anyone who actually knows you in real life knows you're not big drinkers anyway?

Unless of course you are drinking a lot and your aunt's comment has touched a nerve, which is why you haven't just rolled your eyes and moved on already.

I'd unfriend her or put here on the restricted or acquaintance list. She won't know but you can choose what of yours she sees.
"You can use lists to organise your friends on Facebook. Using a list, you can post an update for specific people, such as your coworkers or friends who live near you. You can also see updates from specific groups of people (e.g. close friends, family).
You can add or remove friends from these lists at any time.

Your friend lists on Facebook
To help you get started, you have friend lists for:
Close friends: Friends that you may want to share exclusively with.
Acquaintances: People you might want to share less with. You can choose to exclude these people when you post something, by choosing Friends except acquaintances in the audience selector.
Restricted: This list is for people you've added as a friend but just don't want to share with, such as your boss. When you add someone to your Restricted list, they will only be able to see your public content or posts of yours that you tag them in.
You can also create custom lists to organise friends as you like. You choose who goes into these lists and what (if any) privacy restrictions apply."

If your drinking is not a problem why would you even worry. I see lots of laughing comments on posts saying things like “ ooh on the Prosecco again” never would I have even thought that was a dig.

Really! If you don't want comments don't post on Facebook book! Nothing to get het up about anyway. Comment says more about the originator than you.

Yep, I would delete it as it annoys you. I would not give it air time by giving a PA reply or any response at all other than a deletion. I can't say a comment like this would bother me in isolation but these things are nuanced (e.g. she only ever makes comments where alcohol is concerned and ignores your other posts).

Then change the audience for this post and any others that she has posted on that have annoyed you, so she cannot see them. Be quite selective about what you share with her in future by putting her on your restricted/acquaintance list. I wouldn't do anything like blocking or confronting.

I’d either delete or say you’re in training to get to her drinking levels - cheeky cow

She's probably just a bit envious that she can't drink any more. Just put something like 'Oh yes, love an ice cold G and T on a hot summers day.'

I would not comment back as you will look like the AH as aunt will cry foul to family and you become the villain. Instead just use the privacy settings so it looks like she can follow you but can’t see any posts. I can’t remember the setting.
is there someone you can speak to or just speak to aunt directly and say you don’t like her comments and to stop.

if she doesn’t then block her.

This.

Or better still, ignore completely.

This is a superb response. Do it!

Life's too short to get worked up about what aunties say on Facebook

A variation of that would be

“Yes, but don’t worry. Not like a bottle of wine a night for decades or anything. 😉 “

Man you guys are mean lol.

Auntie could be making a clumsy joke, she doesn't need to be reminded that she'll always be judged for her alcoholism she has taken steps to try to kick.

How dare you react in a way I wouldn’t, everyone should do and act exactly like me!

I’d say “yes living our best lives! “

I’m sure she’s not implying anything. My own sainted mother says “garlic bread?” in an attempt at a joke every time I post that I’ve been in a restaurant. She forgets that she’s said it many times already. Don’t be too hard on her

Ex drinkers/smokers/over eaters are always the worst

Seriously… seems like your aunt is probably trying to be flippant…

I quit drinking for over 8 months, because I was drinking too much. During that time I was very aware of how much other people drank, but I didn’t comment on it. Now I drink well within the national weekly guidelines. But it’s really hard. Perhaps Auntie is struggling with quitting and clumsily made an inappropriate comment?

Please don’t make a flippant comment, like suggested. She’s trying hard to stay sober. Of course her just liking the post would have been her best option, but she messed up. Just let it go, do nothing. She might be hyper aware of any one with a drink still, because she’s still adjusting. I think she needs understanding not anger or ridicule.

This. 100%. Be the bigger person and let her own comment do the talking.

You’re right, when you hide a comment on Facebook the author and their friends can still see it, but not any other friends you have.
If you also want to make it invisible for your aunt’s fb friends, you’ll have to delete it. Your aunt won’t be notified that you deleted it.

I wouldn’t delete it but reply something along the lines of ‘oh you are just jealous, but don’t worry we are nowhere near what you were drinking 😂’

Put her on restricted friends list so she only sees public stuff - and leave the comment hidden but ignore it. Or just write “but we only drink socially and under the guideline amounts so nothing to be worried about 😊”

I'd delete the comment and quietly unfriend her in a couple of weeks. Don't tell anyone just do it - no need to explain, feign ignorance if questioned - say you'll look into it and don't know how that happened!