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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To delete this comment on FB about alcohol

91 replies

Frustratedfifty · 09/08/2025 12:40

DH and I went out last night. I took a photo of him in a wine bar and it was a really nice pic so I posted it on FB. Got the usual likes and a few comments about how he never ages (he doesn’t - annoying haha). One of my aunties commented ‘you two drinking again!’

This isn’t the first time she’s said something like this. For context we drink alcohol once or twice a week and I’m not someone who posts a lot about drinking. I post on SM a couple of times a month - mostly walks we’ve gone on, concerts or sport. She never comments on those - only when alcohol is visible or we are in a bar.

My aunty has given up drinking a while ago for health reasons (was told she had to). Prior to that she drank a bottle of wine every night for decades. So the hypocrisy is wild!

I’ve hidden the comment but apparently the person and their friends can still see it so my whole family basically. I know my mum will be upset about it. AIBU to delete it?

OP posts:
ScrambledEggs12 · 09/08/2025 14:48

She's jealous because she can't drink anymore.

Bikergran · 09/08/2025 14:49

Frustratedfifty · 09/08/2025 13:16

That’s what DH says. And that everyone in the family knows she drank heavily for most of her life.

Show quote history

There's nobody more bloody self-righteous than a reformed drinker/smoker/overeater etc.......I agree to replying with the comeback "Don't worry, nowhere near your previous intake level!".

StrawberryCranberry · 09/08/2025 14:50

SkylarFalls · 09/08/2025 13:41

Nah don't delete it, just change the privacy settings on your photos to Friends Except Aunt

This is what I would do.

Panterusblackish · 09/08/2025 14:52

Just reply, yes why?

SquishedMallow · 09/08/2025 14:53

I gave up drinking, but I'd never comment like her!

At the end of the day "drinkers" are still my people , I was one ! I don't begrudge s grown adult without a drinking problem having a drink whatsoever. Doesn't even cross my mind to judge them.

She's become one of those annoying people I'm afraid. It's a her problem. I'd probably remove her from your friends to be honest. She's obviously on your profile for nefarious reasons. I won't accept the aunt of my DH for a similar reason. She's there to stalk and judge/gossip (she'd fund it in the most banal things ) she'd be sifting all through my profile pics since 2007 and scouring through my friends list at 2am. No thanks .

BondAway25 · 09/08/2025 15:01

I'd post something like 'yep, but fortunately know how to do so in moderation! '

MaggiesShadow · 09/08/2025 15:03

"Yep. Not quite up to your previous levels though."

I wouldn't actually respond with that but I'd be tempted. Honestly, I'd just delete it and I'd probably restrict her.

treesandsun · 09/08/2025 15:04

I would either say yes we haven't been told we must give up like you were or again? When was the last time we were out drinking? Or you can set the audience so she doesn't see anything that you post or say would you like me to block you from seeing any posts involving alcohol if it triggers you.

DiscoBob · 09/08/2025 15:31

I think you should just respond with 'yep. We sure are. Not everyone has an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. A couple of drinks now and then is fantastic fun for us and many others.'

If you're not problem drinkers you can clearly see she's saying it because of her own background with it.

AuntyDepressant · 09/08/2025 15:39

Frustratedfifty · 09/08/2025 12:40

DH and I went out last night. I took a photo of him in a wine bar and it was a really nice pic so I posted it on FB. Got the usual likes and a few comments about how he never ages (he doesn’t - annoying haha). One of my aunties commented ‘you two drinking again!’

This isn’t the first time she’s said something like this. For context we drink alcohol once or twice a week and I’m not someone who posts a lot about drinking. I post on SM a couple of times a month - mostly walks we’ve gone on, concerts or sport. She never comments on those - only when alcohol is visible or we are in a bar.

My aunty has given up drinking a while ago for health reasons (was told she had to). Prior to that she drank a bottle of wine every night for decades. So the hypocrisy is wild!

I’ve hidden the comment but apparently the person and their friends can still see it so my whole family basically. I know my mum will be upset about it. AIBU to delete it?

So just reply, ‘Yeah, we’ll be catching up with you soon if we aren’t careful!’ 😉

Chompingatthebeat · 09/08/2025 16:07

Funny how there's only one letter difference between aunt and c**t.

Imisscoffee2021 · 09/08/2025 16:09

Given her back story I'd be tempted to just reply and say something like "we are indeed but as we say, everything in moderation!"

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 09/08/2025 16:53

just reply to her that's rich coming from someone who spent every night of her life drinking a whole bottle of wine!! then post

UtterlyButterly2048 · 09/08/2025 17:01

Ignore it. Ex drinkers/smokers can be…annoyingly evangelical in their abstinence. Don’t bite.

lilylulus · 09/08/2025 17:12

Why delete it? I would reply with "Jealous?"

LinaLouLa · 10/08/2025 16:07

I'd block the aunt from your social media.....

RafaFan · 10/08/2025 16:13

Just delete it. It's your FB page, you can delete comments if you want to. She probably won't even notice.

meganorks · 10/08/2025 16:22

Honestly can't see why it's bothering you. The people who know her, know shes the one who has had a problem with drinking. And people who don't know her wouldn't see any issue with the statement.

SparklesGlitter · 10/08/2025 16:23

Leave it on. You’re posting a picture of the two of you having a lovely time. Fair play. It’s your profile. It’s not your oroblem that she can’t drink. I do find this with ex smokers and ex drinkers o who are older…they ramp up the judgement but at the end of the day she’s probably just holding up a mirror. I’d be inclined to reply with ‘…and having a really lovely time’

YourFairCyanReader · 10/08/2025 16:29

If your aunt has been told she had to stop drinking alcohol, is it possible she has been quite poorly as a result of alcohol abuse? Does she have cirrhosis of the liver for example which would have reduced her life expectancy? If she has had a serious wake-up call, she could be very aware of the risks of drinking alcohol and not want her loved family members to risk it at all. I would try to be a bit more sensitive about it. If you're not drinking a lot why is it getting to you? Just reassure her you're under the weekly recommended units.

chipsaway · 10/08/2025 16:30

It sounds quite innocent to me. Someone has said this to me and I’ve said it myself. No offence intended. Another one I’ve heard is ‘are you two going away again?’

NewMrsF · 10/08/2025 16:31

I’d have pulled her up on it in the comments. How does she know you don’t have work colleagues or even your boss as a friend of Facebook! Comments like that could get you in trouble or at least have people viewing you poorly.

Littlejellyuk · 10/08/2025 16:36

I would have said, yep! And don't worry, I will have one for you as well 😉

Littlejellyuk · 10/08/2025 16:37

lilylulus · 09/08/2025 17:12

Why delete it? I would reply with "Jealous?"

Love this ☝️ 💯 😆

FreyaW · 10/08/2025 16:37

Frustratedfifty · 09/08/2025 12:40

DH and I went out last night. I took a photo of him in a wine bar and it was a really nice pic so I posted it on FB. Got the usual likes and a few comments about how he never ages (he doesn’t - annoying haha). One of my aunties commented ‘you two drinking again!’

This isn’t the first time she’s said something like this. For context we drink alcohol once or twice a week and I’m not someone who posts a lot about drinking. I post on SM a couple of times a month - mostly walks we’ve gone on, concerts or sport. She never comments on those - only when alcohol is visible or we are in a bar.

My aunty has given up drinking a while ago for health reasons (was told she had to). Prior to that she drank a bottle of wine every night for decades. So the hypocrisy is wild!

I’ve hidden the comment but apparently the person and their friends can still see it so my whole family basically. I know my mum will be upset about it. AIBU to delete it?

Delete the post or delete her comment?
Don't delete the photo...
In future do what I do .limit who can see the post when posting.."friends except" and put her name in. You can choose your audience for everything you post.

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