My neighbour is threatening to report me for “benefit fraud”

[AugustSlippedAwayInto]

I’m currently signed off sick from work after an operation last week. My street is full of gossips (to put it nicely) so the entire street knows why I’m off. Brill.

For full disclosure, the relationship with this neighbour is rocky at best. She’s screamed abuse at me and my family in the street before, she watched everyone from her window and films people walking past very regularly.

I decided that I felt well enough for a short walk yesterday, so my mum came over and offered we went. I think we were out for about half an hour, with a break halfway.

This morning as soon as she’s seen I’m up (lights on, curtains open etc) she’s banging on my door saying she’s contacted my work and “the government” to report that I’m “committing fraud”. I’m talking shouting, banging my door so hard I thought she’d break the glass, slapping the front windows. It’s all on the ring camera.

I’m not on SSP, as I get occupational sick pay, and after my walk I slept for three hours! WIBU to just tell her to do one and to leave me alone?

I’d report her for harassment! What a nutter. Hope you recover well OP x

Sorry @AugustSlippedAwayInto I’d be reporting her to the police for harrassment!

Its actually none of your employers business what you do while signed off sick, if you’re signed off by a medical professional then you’re off sick, end of… being off does not mean you’re on house arrest!!

After my hysterectomy I was told I had to take 6 weeks off, but I left hospital and walked to the local shops the same day..
Going for a walk is hardly a crime, and actually keeping mobile after an operation is good for circulation!

It's the same as noticing a neighbour hasn't drawn their curtains in the morning (or at night) as they usually would. Noticing things like that can be really vital for people who live alone, especially elderly neighbours.

So if you’d noticed a neighbour in employment one morning hadn’t opened her shower window, you would call?

No I'd probably keep an eye out over the next 24 hours unless I knew they had health issues. But I've had a postman check before because they'd noticed my curtains were still drawn when they'd normally be open, I saw that as a good thing and was grateful they'd taken the time to knock on my door. I was more replying because I don't think noticing a window hasn't been opened is any different to noticing curtains haven't been drawn or a car hasn't moved.

Precisely

you wouldn’t call them in the morning and potentially disturb a day off or a lie in to ask why their shower window isn’t open because you’re concerned

you. Would. Wait.

But you don't know the history of the person who rang or how regular the poster is about having a shower at that time. I'd rather someone erred on the side of caution and asked than didn't.

In the meantime put some reflective film on your living room window. It helps with heat in the summer and has the added advantage of keeping nosey parkers staring at their own image instead of inside your home.

Some years ago it was against the rules to even go outside if you were "on the sick". I wonder if your neighbour thinks this still applies? Is she elderly? Mind you, I'm nearly 74 and know this isn't the case now.

Report her.
through your ring, tell her to leave your property or you’ll have her remove by the police.

Also. Move.

She's nuts, and projecting her boredom and issues on to everyone else. Don't engage. Record every incident and call the police.

It's sad that you're getting blamed for being friendly with your neighbours. In a properly functioning society we wouldn't all be worrying about triggering the nutcase, she'd be locked away getting treated and everyone else could get on with being normal.

No one is blaming the op for “being friendly with her neighbours”… don’t be so hyperbolic 🤭

but the op is telling a street full of gossips her private health issues knowing that someone dangerous sounding and mentally ill is on the street and it always seems to get fed to her too.

So… seems sensible to be a touch more private about your health issues. Doesn’t mean you can’t still be very “friendly”!

Nonsense

OP, I think it’s lovely that you have a community of grannies looking out for you! It is a shame about the nutbag, but yes, it is mental health, log it, build the picture, keep your self protected and covered just in case, and try not to let it get to you.

I hope you recover well from your op, you’ll be well fed by the sounds of it! 😂

So one of those you get on with has told her.

No it wasn’t

It’s bizarre isn’t it

this lovely friendly street of gossips are sharing the gossip with the mentally ill woman harassing the op

Its harrassment report her keep reporting her she sounds crackers tbh.

@XenoBitch it's really not as awful as it sounds 😆, we had a brilliant relationship and she'd have done it with 100% the best of intentions. If it had been anybody but her, I would have probably been creeped out, but she was more like family to us than a neighbour.

We were more like family than just neighbours. She knew what my routine was and it was unlike me to not be up at that time so she rang. I was incredibly grateful that day, having slept through my alarm! We did lots of things for each other, and she did mother me 😊

I was grateful....I'd have been incredibly late for work if she hadn't noticed 😊

She sounds unhinged.

1. I would not escalate with her- just ignore her.
2. I would report the incident of her reporting you, banging on your door and shouting at you to the police on 101- ask about a nonmolestation order that will prohibit her from going on your property or within x metres of you- you will likely get an appt to go down to the station and file a report take the footage as well.
3. I would also call adult social services and tell them ALL of it and ask for them to do a well check or assess her as she appears to be mentally unwell and vulnerable living alone.
4. You can also approach your local council about nuisance laws.

Presuming the poster might have mentioned that there was a back story to why said neighbour was such high alert.

So presuming there isn’t a reason why the neighbour would not see a window open and call her neighbour in the morning - then I agree with PPs… does that poster have to tell her neighbour every time she’s booked a day off? Or that she doesn’t need to go in normal time to work due to a dentist appointment? Otherwise expect to be woken up by neighbour asking why you’re not in the shower yet? Awful

Do you have to tell her @Helen1625 whenever you’ve booked a day off or going in later than normal?

@Megaclean I'd have mentioned to her if I was off work for any reason, yes. We were good friends. More like family than just neighbours. I appreciated her thinking of me 😊