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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be furious that my neighbour ‘borrowed’ my garden furniture for her BBQ?

238 replies

2coolec · 05/08/2025 17:37

Went away for the weekend, came back Monday afternoon to find our patio table, four chairs, and parasol in next door’s garden.

Turns out she’d had a BBQ on Sunday and “thought we wouldn’t mind” if she borrowed them. Was “going to return it”. Only I found out because by Monday evening it was still all sat there and I saw her teenage son and his mates hanging out on my furniture.

No note. No text. Just helped herself. I wouldn’t even have known if I hadn’t looked over the fence.

I’m honestly livid. It’s not a small thing to borrow and she didn’t even ask. What if it had got damaged? Or gone missing?

AIBU to think this is beyond cheeky and actually borderline theft?

OP posts:
nosleepforme · 05/08/2025 19:54

Nooooo! I’d be mad enough to call the police for theft

AlexisP90 · 05/08/2025 19:57

Thats theft? She stole it. Simple as that really. She took it without your permission.
Totally weird... and totally out of order

AngryBookworm · 05/08/2025 20:09

This is incredible. I hope you turfed them off and made them carry it back to yours. Can you 'borrow' something from their garden and see how they like it?

Americano75 · 05/08/2025 20:12

Bloody hell, that's some cheek!

TheSaltedCaramelPath · 05/08/2025 20:21

I would make them squirm - I would say we have a crime reference number, as Imhad to report to the police that our garden furniture had been stolen and “other neighbours are checking their Ring doorbells for any footage” …

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 05/08/2025 20:25

They have your number but chose not to ask, very disrespectful.

Surprised no one has told OP to gift it to them.

CautiousLurker01 · 05/08/2025 20:27

Growlybear83 · 05/08/2025 18:32

I would be furious if anyone, regardless of how well I knew them or how much I liked them, took it upon themselves to trespass onto my property and take my belongings without asking.

Agree… and would report to the police. It’s theft.

OldWomanInACardigan · 05/08/2025 20:27

She's a VERY cheeky fucker.

viques · 05/08/2025 20:27

the80sweregreat · 05/08/2025 19:45

Dh has some chairs in the shed which are pretty light , but you’d still struggle to get them over a fence of any height! It must have taken a few of them to get it over to their garden.

I expect that is why the teenage sons mates were invited to the bbq.

JudgeJ · 05/08/2025 20:32

MC846 · 05/08/2025 19:39

Well she's just stolen your garden furniture hasn't she, I'd report her to the police tbh 🤷♀️

If she intends to return it, ie not permanently deprive you of it, is it stealing? My Year 10/11 joy riders were usually charged with 'taking without the owner's consent' and not theft, how often did I hear the words 'Won't be in tomorrow, in court for my twocky' !

When we were away over Christmas our next door neighbour borrowed some extra dining chairs, plates, cutlery and a small table as they were hosting a very large family group but it had all been arranged beforehand! Everything was back in place along with wine and chocolates when we returned. No way would they ever do that without our consent though.

Nachoinseachthu · 05/08/2025 20:34

This reminds me of the time my next door neighbour thought I was going to be away and I slipped home unexpectedly to find she’d told her AirBnB flat guests it was okay to use my washing line. Found a strangers damp clothes in my garden. Some people beyond the pale!

Vitrolinsanity · 05/08/2025 20:40

It’s the not asking, and then the getting caught red-handed. I’d hit the roof over.

LindorDoubleChoc · 05/08/2025 20:42

When we were away on holiday our neighbours had a problem with their hot water. They had a key (for emergencies only) and admitted that they'd all come over (4 of them) and had baths and showers for a couple of days. I was Shock literally speechless.

AtWitsEnd21 · 05/08/2025 20:44

Absolute CF! I’m very friendly with my neighbours and we would never do this to each other so I don’t think the nature of the relationship is of any relevance

crystalmamma · 05/08/2025 20:48

I absolutely know my neighbours wouldn’t mind as we are good friends (they even have a key to my house) but I would still just drop a text to ask - Royal CF’s to take without asking.

Awaywiththegnomes · 05/08/2025 20:50

LindorDoubleChoc · 05/08/2025 20:42

When we were away on holiday our neighbours had a problem with their hot water. They had a key (for emergencies only) and admitted that they'd all come over (4 of them) and had baths and showers for a couple of days. I was Shock literally speechless.

what made them admit it?

if they admitted it, I can’t understand why they didn’t just ask?
surely you noticed as soon as you returned… unless they seriously covered their tracks!

Awaywiththegnomes · 05/08/2025 20:52

TheSaltedCaramelPath · 05/08/2025 20:21

I would make them squirm - I would say we have a crime reference number, as Imhad to report to the police that our garden furniture had been stolen and “other neighbours are checking their Ring doorbells for any footage” …

So you’d bluff @TheSaltedCaramelPath ? Or would you actually report?

Awaywiththegnomes · 05/08/2025 20:54

CurlewKate · 05/08/2025 18:59

No point in this really-if you mind, you mind. I wouldn’t mind! People are different.

The fact you wouldn’t mind @CurlewKate … does that mean you’d do the same under the assumption that others too wouldn’t mind?

Flyswats · 05/08/2025 20:54

Did anyone die in the process of borrowing garden furniture?
Were any plants ruined?
did the son and his friends piss on the cushions?

No to all of the above?

Awaywiththegnomes · 05/08/2025 21:05

Flyswats · 05/08/2025 20:54

Did anyone die in the process of borrowing garden furniture?
Were any plants ruined?
did the son and his friends piss on the cushions?

No to all of the above?

Let me guess…. Anyone post about not being able to afford a holiday and feeling really low about it, you pipe up with “think of famine victims and that should make you feel better about it” or words to that effect?

Dolphinosep0tatoes · 05/08/2025 21:08

It's theft. I'd have reported to police.
The fact that she returned it doesn't mean it was theft in the first place, I'd have lost my shit.

Dolphinosep0tatoes · 05/08/2025 21:09

Awaywiththegnomes · 05/08/2025 21:05

Let me guess…. Anyone post about not being able to afford a holiday and feeling really low about it, you pipe up with “think of famine victims and that should make you feel better about it” or words to that effect?

Show quote history

As someone who hasn't been able to afford a holiday in nearly a decade, I concur with you @Awaywiththegnomes

noodlebugz · 05/08/2025 21:12

I think I’d take them back saying you can’t just take peoples things a bit in the manner I say it to me 3 year old. After all that’s about the level her manners are at.
Total CF!

TheFunDog · 05/08/2025 21:18

Not ok... At all.

ManchesterLu · 05/08/2025 21:32

If you get along well enough for them to borrow things, they would surely have a way to contact you to ask. I'd be fuming if my neighbours had been into my garden and taken things without asking. And then even worse that they hadn't even bothered to put the things back!