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Original poster

Please tell me times where you've got the ick with a guy

1000 replies

yeahhhhmate · 31/07/2025 21:07

Lighthearted!! Just that really. I love hearing these

ill start:

went on a date with someone and we played shuffleboard and after every turn of his he would loudly exclaim 'GO ON THE TSG' (his initials) he also did it after random sentences like 'I'll get this drink, YES THE TSG)

another guy would say WOOP WOOP and BOOM after every sentence. He ordered a steak and said to the waiter 'I'm going to have the steak please, well done, (another ick) WOOP WOOP

Another guy we were DTD and he kept thrusting in a complete circular motion and I quite literally dried up and left

another DTD time and the guys top lip and nostrils would spasm / quiver - I could get past that though.

please tell me yours, I could do with a laugh!

OP posts:
Weepixie · 01/08/2025 06:17

InstantIck2 · 31/07/2025 21:24

DTD - started yelling “Receive my di*ck. RECEIVE IT” repeatedly throughout

🤣🤣🤣

jumpingthehighjump · 01/08/2025 06:24

First date, daytime, we'd driven somewhere and he was dropping me off at home.
Started kissing in the car as no way was I asking him in.
After barely a minute of kissing he groaned and shuddered. Then said "ooops".
Yep he'd come in his pants and trousers

I had no desire to explore a second date with him 😂

BeanQuisine · 01/08/2025 06:25

InstantIck2 · 31/07/2025 21:24

DTD - started yelling “Receive my di*ck. RECEIVE IT” repeatedly throughout

Did you have to sign a delivery docket?

KJsy · 01/08/2025 06:26

InstantIck2 · 31/07/2025 21:24

DTD - started yelling “Receive my di*ck. RECEIVE IT” repeatedly throughout

😂😂😂

jen337 · 01/08/2025 06:33

saltandvinegarchipsticks · 01/08/2025 01:28

He was on top of me and a massive bogey fell out of his nostril and went into my mouth.

Mumsnet please delete this post 🤮

Original poster
yeahhhhmate · 01/08/2025 06:41

OneNeatBlueOrca · 31/07/2025 21:36

Referred to it as my private area.

i nearly said to him are you referring to my cunt

Hahaaaaaa this made me laugh 😂😂😂😂 simple but affective

OP posts:
Original poster
yeahhhhmate · 01/08/2025 06:43

Zanatdy · 01/08/2025 05:59

It’s funny how you can get the ick. Guy at work i’ve had a thing about for 5yrs (and have had sex with him a few times, we have a casual thing going on) came to work wearing shorts and Tshirt in the last heat wave. I don’t know why, but at 6ft guy wearing shorts and carrying his backpack and anorak really gave me the ick. He was also wearing shorts when I went over a couple of weeks ago but that wasn’t so bad, just in the office it was a big no!! I’d rather unbutton a pair of jeans than shorts though, but after a few G&T’s it was fine. But it has changed my slight obsession with him, which is a good thing. Thanks heatwave!

Double ick bonus points if the backpacks on the front and been turned into a frontpack!

OP posts:
KJsy · 01/08/2025 06:44

ScaredOfRat · 31/07/2025 21:41

My (male) flatmate pulled an absolutely beautiful Northern girl. Every time they had sex she’d yell, “Pump me! Pump me!” (Pronounced “poomp”).

Devastating for him, but fucking hilarious for the rest of us 😂

😂😂😂

Original poster
yeahhhhmate · 01/08/2025 06:48

InstantIck2 · 31/07/2025 21:39

One man I really liked kept referring to his penis as “he” and “him”

An I had one of those. My ex referred to his dick as 'his man'

'could you suck my man' EWWW

OP posts:
MountainsAndSheep · 01/08/2025 06:49

We’d just finished DTD and he asked me to hold his balls, he said he likes falling asleep with women cupping his balls. It makes him feel secure 🤢
I waited until he fell asleep then snuck out and never spoke to him again. Awkwardly, I had to endure 2 more years of Uni with him as a classmate.

Icanttakethisanymore · 01/08/2025 06:55

dijonketchup · 31/07/2025 22:20

The guy who cooked me dinner on our second date. A drop of sauce fell from my fork onto the table as I began eating (I know, what an animal) and he immediately jumped up to remove the plates and spot clean the tablecloth with stain remover.

At the time I got the ick but now I think he sounds great 😂 he was just careful!

Haha, yeah now I’m old I’d be thinking ‘amazing’ he cleans!

Katemax82 · 01/08/2025 06:56

I had a guy i was crazy about who only liked to do foreplay standing up (looking back im thinking why did I tolerate this??!!)
He also thought it was adequate to rub my clit slowly for about 2 seconds then go really fast for a few seconds. He had no clue (and had been married, separated apparently. Poor wife)

Firebox64 · 01/08/2025 06:56

Wanted to discuss our A level results. I was 40.

Icanttakethisanymore · 01/08/2025 06:57

jumpingthehighjump · 01/08/2025 06:24

First date, daytime, we'd driven somewhere and he was dropping me off at home.
Started kissing in the car as no way was I asking him in.
After barely a minute of kissing he groaned and shuddered. Then said "ooops".
Yep he'd come in his pants and trousers

I had no desire to explore a second date with him 😂

Omg 😂

Icanttakethisanymore · 01/08/2025 06:58

DeathNote11 · 01/08/2025 06:14

Waking up in the middle of the night thinking my back was bathed in sweat, but it was actually his piss. It was then all 'weyhey' from his family as if it was some affectionate little idiosyncracy. 'Ahhh, it must have been a good night for him to get in that state' like it was something to be proud of. Ick is an understatement, dirty bastard.

Wtf 😱

Ferrissia3 · 01/08/2025 07:03

BlueOceanFish · 31/07/2025 23:08

DTD with a guy, he was struggling to finish up so got up and put on ‘Smack my Bitch up’ by Prodigy really loudly.

He then came.

Edited

OMG that's HORRENDOUS!! 😖

Marooney · 01/08/2025 07:04

OP have you posted this before? Your first 2 examples sound really familiar 🤔 Here are mine, all different people:

Kept licking my nose on the first date while kissing me - not by mistake - he would purposefully stop mid-kiss to lick the tip of my nose a few times before resuming.

Used to wear a big fleece-lined denim jacket (with jeans).

Gave me a lift on his motorbike and his helmet was way too small for me, couldn't get it on. I have a normal sized head.

Mid 30s, didn't know the difference between yoghurt, mayonnaise and cream and thought they were all made of butter.

Insisted on wearing size L boxer shorts which were way too big for his skinny frame because he thought the size referred to the penis and was convinced his was huge (it was just quite long).

KJsy · 01/08/2025 07:04

Echobelly · 31/07/2025 22:05

Date with a guy I got on Ok with, but then he said something like 'I can tell you're a very cynical person' - I think he was trying to be flattering, like 'You're intelligent because intelligent people are cynical' but I actually hate that attitude because I think there's nothing smart inherently about being cynical, and nothing dumb about being cheerful or optimistic. He just got me so wrong it was a big 'nope'

One HUGE ick!

LauraP94 · 01/08/2025 07:04

An ex used to drip a huge amount of sweat over me when having sex (even on cool days) and would say ‘oooo doesn’t that feel good baby girl’ in a baby voice when he first went in.

LauraP94 · 01/08/2025 07:10

Oh and my friend once got the ick from a man she was giving a blowjob to as he howled and repeatedly said ‘ooo nosh me off harder’.

jumpingthehighjump · 01/08/2025 07:10

Used to wear a big fleece-lined denim jacket (with jeans).

Double denim would be enough for me to walk away 😂

Katemax82 · 01/08/2025 07:10

shuggles · 31/07/2025 23:20

You dislike a man for asking what you enjoy during sex? Men are specifically asked by women to communicate better and ask about sexual preferences, this man listened, and you disliked that?

Show quote history

Not as bad as a guy who looked up after a minute and said "this isn't doing anything for you is it?" Ffs it takes longer than a minute

NoSourDough · 01/08/2025 07:14

pinkstripeycat · 31/07/2025 23:02

When my DH mimics his dad’s voice. 🤮

My lovely FIL has passed now but I have to agree with you on this one!!! The ick comes in strong…

Sally2791 · 01/08/2025 07:16

These are hilarious. Especially Receive!!

BeanQuisine · 01/08/2025 07:22

Been too many to remember, but one that comes to mind:

He invited me to a barbeque at his big posh house with a lovely garden. There was very little to eat but the house and grounds were beautiful.

During the course of the afternoon he admitted it wasn't actually his place, it belonged to "his aunty".

Then his "housemate" arrived, who revealed that he owned the place, and my "host" was a lodger who he'd kicked out weeks ago for missing too many rent payments.

"WHY ARE YOU STILL HERE?!" he shouted, and a very angry altercation ensued, during which I quietly left.

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