AIBU to return it?

[StJamesInfirmary]

I bought a smoothing bodysuit to wear under a clingy dress yesterday. Tried it on in the changing rooms and it fits fine. Had it on last night for about 6 hours and it was so incredibly painful by the time I got home. Just woken up and I still have red marks from where it was digging in at the top of the cups. I'll never be able to wear it again - do you think m&s would allow a refund? I had some new shoes I wore for a night out that gave me awful blisters and I was offered a full refund from a different retailer for them so it's not unheard of for shops to accept returns for items that are so poorly designed they cause pain to wear them.

I don't think they give refunds on those types of things generally underwear and swimwear is excluded

I can't believe you are being advised to re-attach the sticky hygienic gusset cover. wtaf? 🤨

I understand returning something that’s not fit for purpose but at least be honest and explain it’s been worn. That’s disgusting to stick the plastic back on and pretend it’s not been worn, massively unfair to the staff who need to handle it and the poor innocent person who then buys a worn product.

I doubt you can return it.
How did you think a smoothing item would work? I'd have thought it obvious that some degree of compression was involved.

See tbh I don't really see how a bra is such an intimate item. After all you can try on in the changing rooms in shops exactly the same as other items so I can't see why you can't try at home.anf return if they don't fit. I think bras are some of my most expensive items so certainly wouldn't be writing the cost off willy- nilly.

Trying something on is completely different than wearing it next to your skin for a length of time.
As for sticking the plastic back on, as pp suggested, no, absolutely no.

I'd actually worn mine for the day to see how it worked though. Agree if you're only trying it on though, totally!

No, I’ve actually never done it but in the ops situation I might! If they were soiled I wouldn’t, but I can wear underwear and it doesn’t get visibly dirty in one wear. I still wash it but it’s not soiled.
I also think a shop assistant in marks and Spencer is used to people returning underwear and swimwear regularly so know how to handle items correctly. I doubt they see someone’s returned item and go automatically for the gusset area to hold it.
People try on swimwear with that plastic bit in all the time without their underwear on so it’s probably full of bacteria anyway.
I think you’re all totally mental thinking that people don’t wear underwear and swimwear and try to return it - it happens all the time!

Well actually I am not " totally mental" and I am aware that some people behave in a gross and unacceptable way.

I was just surprised, even if this is an anonymous forum, that you were actually suggesting that OP should join the ranks of those with no sense of decent behaviour or respect for others when it comes to hygiene.

People are in the changing rooms trying it on and you have no idea how poor someone’s hygiene might be. If they don’t buy it, it goes back out to sale. I do think people are deluded to think that the swimwear, shape wear etc is totally clean. If I bought shape wear that was poorly designed and made, I would 100% return it - worn or not.

Well clearly you can because you did but you are a CF.
If I returned every pair of shoes that gave me blisters I would be wearing nothing but Crocs and my Archies flipflops

The replies here have got me looking into consumer rights now 😂 so citizens advice says you can request a refund for an item that is unusable/not fit for purpose. I get that this is a grey area and will depend on what people are prepared to put up with from their clothes but I am not prepared to be hurt or injured by the clothes I wear - call me crazy - and therefore would count blisters on the top of my feet and sores from bra straps as rendering those items not fit for purpose.

I clearly have no shame 🤣
I’m surprised how reluctant people are to return things in general, hence why I commented. People always ask on mumsnet whether they should return all manner of things - I always think when you buy something, the expectation is that it is made and designed well enough to last you some time (minimum a year!) if it’s poorly made, breaks, splits, poorly designed so you cannot wear it, poor quality material and stitching etc, you’re within your rights to return it and they should know so they can improve standards or change supplier.

Arguably though, the expectation is that you ensure a good fit before purchase.

You can’t blame poor design because it doesn’t fit your specific body when you didn’t check before purchase. To do its intended purchase it has to be made of fabric that can hold its shape and be somewhat rigid.

Presumably if they are trying it on in the changing room they are trying it on with the hygiene strip on. Not removing the hygiene strip to try the underwear/ shapewear on and then putting the hygiene strip back on if they don't buy it.

I must say your posts are extremely depressing. I' m sure they won't have done much for the sales of intimate items.
There's been threads on MN before about whether people would buy underwear from charity shops and the consensus of opinion is no, because people don't like the thought of wearing underwear others have worn. But you've made the charity shop option sound preferable to buying supposedly new intimate clothing that people have worn and returned without even washing.

Agreed CF is the word for OP!

Sorry PP but your behaviour is gross.🤮 Gosh there really are some dirty, entitled people out there!

I meant job rather than purchase obviously.

The problem is expecting every item of clothing or shoes to fit everyone of that size.

A size 12 top will look and feel vastly different on someone of 5’1 and 5’10. It may look better on one than the other, it doesn’t mean it’s badly made.

Same with shoes, we all have different feet so even the same size in different types of shoe might not suit your particular body.

I’ve bought swimwear and bras for charity shops, It doesn’t bother me, I just wash it. I don’t view buying something from M&S much differently. I assume people have worn and tried things on as they’re going to need to be washed. If you think that plastic strip is going to save you from peoples poor hygiene, you’re mistaken.

They take it back, it gets re sold or sent to an outlet to be resold or to a charity shop to make money for charity. It’s a darn sight better that it sitting in someone’s wardrobe or going in the bin and you’re not out of pocket and the giant corporation that everyone seems to be so incredibly loyal to couldn’t care less. They take into account for this when they mass produce these items on a low budget and put huge mark ups on.

I completely agree with not expecting all clothes to fit all bodies. I'm a comfort over style person and won't buy clothes that aren't comfortable to wear. I also accept that some amount of rubbing or I'll fitting-ness is to be expected. I've got Birkenstocks that give me blisters when I break them in every summer, without fail, but understand this is part of the process. The two items I've referred to I did try on. I walked around my house in the shoes before wearing them out and I tried the body suit on (with my own undies underneath 😂) in store with the dress I was going to wear over the top. I'm a middle aged women, been wearing bras since young adolescence and have never been left with sores from the plastic connecting the straps to the cups from them before so this is exceptionally poor design.

The feeling is mutual!

I think if it has a design or manufacturing fault, then you should be able to return it.

I don’t quite understand those saying you shouldn’t return, just because the retailer can’t resell it. They shouldn’t be reselling something with a fault anyway.

Although I also don’t quite understand what you mean by there being plastic at the straps. Maybe a photo would help.

I lost my thread a little bit there. What I was going to say is your example of tops fitting people differently is sort of neither here nor there. Someone would try it on and make a decision if it suited/fit them. I'm not talking about returning items that don't suit me or fit me. I've tried items on, been satisfied with the fit/style and found after a few hours of wear that they are not useable - nothing to do with looking different on me because I'm taller than someone else who wore it.

It's difficult to know how valid your refund request is without knowing if it's a fit issue or a design fault which will likely affect many people, regardless of fit. However, it's fine to tell them that you have worn it, explained why you would like to return it and see what they say. That feels totally non-controversial to me.