Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think i deserve some privacy

74 replies

Forthelovagod · 21/07/2025 23:43

Partners daughter back home for summer from uni. She comes home after 11pm, we are in bed having sex, he jumps under covers and shouts her through for a chat because we were away the night before and he hadn't seen her since getting back.
Lying there under the duvet making small talk makes me incredibly uncomfortable not to mention frustrated because after the chat its game over.

He thinks im being unreasonable as he hadn't seen her. I think its unnecessary, she lives independently in term time and she certainly wouldn't call him through for a chat if she was lying in bed with her boyfriend.

Aibu

OP posts:
Eenameenadeeka · 21/07/2025 23:53

Gosh no, that's a bizarre thing he did.

Foreverm0re · 22/07/2025 00:04

weird

Livingthebestlife · 22/07/2025 00:04

🤔 So you're both lying under the covers, her standing there having a conversation, surely it was obvious what had been happening. Yes it's very strange and very weird.

takealettermsjones · 22/07/2025 00:07

That squicks me right out 😬 he was weird and unreasonable.

JudgeBread · 22/07/2025 00:10

That's actually so fucking weird, like what he just pulled out mid fuck and called his daughter into the room? Who does that?

Dazzlemered · 22/07/2025 00:10

That is fucking odd. I can’t get my head around why he would do that.

FrazzledHippy · 22/07/2025 00:11

Yeah that's fucking strange. His poor DD too! Have you told him you weren't happy about it? And again, it's fucking weird and honestly, disgusting when you think about the details of it. I think I'd of asked him wtf he was playing at!

Original poster
Forthelovagod · 22/07/2025 00:12

He often shouts through to her when she arrives home. Think because he was always single it seemed fine, checking in kinda thing. When im there i find it really uncomfortable and intrusive and mostly unnecessary but when i mentioned it the other day, mostly because i was still feeling frustrated at being left hanging almost a week on, he was pissed at me and said 'fgs i hadn't seen my daughter in 2 days' (saw her fri night this was Sun night) ... So I wondered if maybe im being unreasonable....

OP posts:
BarbaraVineFan · 22/07/2025 00:13

That is really weird, OP.

HappilyUrbanTrimmer · 22/07/2025 00:14

Ew.

She doesn't want to have to think about you and her dad shagging , and it would have been obvious.

How frustrating to be cut off like that.

Was he setting it up as a performance to demonstrate to you and her that she is top priority for his affections?

Original poster
Forthelovagod · 22/07/2025 00:16

Its not the first time its happened. I just feel at that time of night, hear her come in and think fine, home safe, but i feel privacy just goes out the window. Loke he's the teenager and we have just been caught by his mum coming home. It feels horrible for me but he thinks im unreasonable and it's becoming an issue

OP posts:
Sunflower459 · 22/07/2025 00:18

Forthelovagod · 22/07/2025 00:16

Its not the first time its happened. I just feel at that time of night, hear her come in and think fine, home safe, but i feel privacy just goes out the window. Loke he's the teenager and we have just been caught by his mum coming home. It feels horrible for me but he thinks im unreasonable and it's becoming an issue

How did she react? Because if that was my father/stepmother it would have knocked me sick.

potatocrates · 22/07/2025 00:20

He needs to understand that it’s not just his bedroom now.

Original poster
Forthelovagod · 22/07/2025 00:22

She just chats away like its normal. He's clearly done this for ages, calling her through to chat/check in when she gets home but now im on the scene i think its just weird and uncomfortable.

OP posts:
Original poster
Forthelovagod · 22/07/2025 00:23

potatocrates · 22/07/2025 00:20

He needs to understand that it’s not just his bedroom now.

We don't live together

OP posts:
Safxxx · 22/07/2025 00:26

Don't stay over at his house when she's around, invite him to yours instead.

potatocrates · 22/07/2025 00:27

Forthelovagod · 22/07/2025 00:23

We don't live together

Show quote history

That doesn’t matter. He’s your partner and you are in his bed.

Testerical · 22/07/2025 00:31

This sounds like some horrible incest porn storyline.
No sane person would actually do this.

Vaxtable · 22/07/2025 00:36

I wouldn’t be staying the night with him. He can come to yours

Original poster
Forthelovagod · 22/07/2025 00:38

Testerical · 22/07/2025 00:31

This sounds like some horrible incest porn storyline.
No sane person would actually do this.

Yuk its most definitely not. He jumps off me like he's been up to something he shouldn't be mostly because he doesn't want her to feel uncomfortable if she comes home and he's clearly busy wirh me and he's terrified she will hear us as 'no one wants to hear their Dad at it.

OP posts:
Topsyturvy78 · 22/07/2025 00:46

Bizarre I would be pissed off he hadn't finished.😂😂😂

Testerical · 22/07/2025 00:47

Yeah what you’ve just written does not make me change my view: sorry.

if it creeps you out then you stop having sex eith him. Pretty simple.

Original poster
Forthelovagod · 22/07/2025 00:51

Testerical · 22/07/2025 00:47

Yeah what you’ve just written does not make me change my view: sorry.

if it creeps you out then you stop having sex eith him. Pretty simple.

Doesn't creep me out. Just makes me feel uncomfortable and like my privacy doesn't matter

OP posts:
dontcryformeargentina · 22/07/2025 00:59

He doesn’t respect you or your boundaries. 100% inappropriate behavior.

Goinggreymammy · 22/07/2025 01:01

Why doesn't he just put on clothes/a dressing gown and go out to talk to her I he needs to chat and can't wait till morning?

And who on earth are the 4% who think YABU??

Swipe left for the next trending thread