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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To invite the grammar and language pedants to share their pet peeves?

1000 replies

AlertCat · 19/07/2025 14:33

AIBU to feel annoyed when I see people say Slither instead of sliver? It was even in a book I read recently. A slither of cake. No! That makes no sense, unless the cake’s been trodden into the carpet!

Also see: step foot in instead of set foot in

There’s plenty of others but those will do for now.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
14
Beachtastic · 20/07/2025 10:45

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 20/07/2025 10:42

Might depend on how you say it. I say 'new-cle-ar' three syllables that have to be very distinct. Nu-cu-lar can be muttered a lot more easily and sort of run together.

I still don't get it. It's all very unucular.

Goldengirl123 · 20/07/2025 10:47

Too many to list!

FortheloveofCheesus · 20/07/2025 10:47

While I'm enjoying the Biscuit/Cookie debate on here, I think it neglects that in the UK the true term is "biccy", and it has nothing to do with whether it has been twice baked.

It refers to a consistently recognised, sweet, flat baked food, typically packaged in a stacked column, and includes:

  • digestives
  • rich tea
  • malted milk
  • custard creams
  • bourbons
  • hobnobs

And numerous others that any true British citizen can instantly recognise as belonging to the "biccy" class.

marshmallowfinder · 20/07/2025 10:52

SamiSnail · 20/07/2025 09:58

I haven't RTFT but for me, people on this site saying "I'm sat here crying" or "I was stood".
Do the words sitting and standing no longer exist in the English language?

"I'm sat here crying" and "I was stood" doesn't make any logical sense and looks and sounds like broken English.

This is just so awful and infuriates me too. I see and hear it all the time. It's all over the radio and people spout it without a second thought. Speak properly, FFS!

SamiSnail · 20/07/2025 10:53

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 20/07/2025 10:42

Might depend on how you say it. I say 'new-cle-ar' three syllables that have to be very distinct. Nu-cu-lar can be muttered a lot more easily and sort of run together.

Do you say clear as cle-ar , too?

As in the sentence "let me make it clear." Do you say, let me make it cle-AH?

If not, why pronounce nuclear (new-clear) as new-cle-ah?

Beachtastic · 20/07/2025 11:00

Barbadossunset · 20/07/2025 10:29

I would like advice on this one:
I always thought that the phrase ‘the exception that proves the rule’ meant that for a rule to be a rule there must be an exception.
However I was then told that in fact it means the opposite, as ‘prove’ in this case is the old-fashioned sense of ‘test’, as in ‘prove dough’.
Therefore the phrase means the exception that tests the rule and shows it is not a rule - which actually makes more sense.
Is this the case?

I think it just means that if you consider something exceptional, it goes against a pattern that's widely accepted as consistent.

Barbadossunset · 20/07/2025 11:02

Thank you Beachtastic - that makes sense.

cyvguhb · 20/07/2025 11:05

SamiSnail · 20/07/2025 10:53

Do you say clear as cle-ar , too?

As in the sentence "let me make it clear." Do you say, let me make it cle-AH?

If not, why pronounce nuclear (new-clear) as new-cle-ah?

That argument would be valid if English pronunciation has rigid rules that are never broken

JobhuntingDespair · 20/07/2025 11:10

Alot. It's not one word!
Anything written with no punctuation whatsoever.
In speech - things like "she's went to the shop". Argh! It clangs in my brain and I miss the rest of the sentence.

It's not even pedantry, it's really basic mistakes I notice.

ETA: "Tret" as a past tense of "treated". I've seen it written too, where it has autocorrected to "treat" because that's a real word.

Melassa · 20/07/2025 11:10

Incorrect use of past tenses. “I have took” instead of “I took” or “I have taken”. That’s just one example but I’ve seen it happen with different verbs. Wrote/written is another one I see quite a few people get wrong. Why is it so hard? Doesn’t it get taught in schools?

allthemiddlechildrenoftheworld · 20/07/2025 11:14

@AlertCat and what about "are" instead of "our"?? wtf is that all about??

Melassa · 20/07/2025 11:17

Ah yes, “I have went”.

Primary age kids learning English in other countries get taught this properly, why not in UK schools?

Would of and could of is also fairly exclusive to native English speakers.

TaborlinTheGreat · 20/07/2025 11:18

FortheloveofCheesus · 20/07/2025 10:47

While I'm enjoying the Biscuit/Cookie debate on here, I think it neglects that in the UK the true term is "biccy", and it has nothing to do with whether it has been twice baked.

It refers to a consistently recognised, sweet, flat baked food, typically packaged in a stacked column, and includes:

  • digestives
  • rich tea
  • malted milk
  • custard creams
  • bourbons
  • hobnobs

And numerous others that any true British citizen can instantly recognise as belonging to the "biccy" class.

Edited

Urgh. I hate 'biccy' (said by adults). It sounds infantile, like 'ickle' and 'holibobs'.

TaborlinTheGreat · 20/07/2025 11:19

Internaut · 20/07/2025 09:49

Include in that incorrect pluperfects. E.g. "If he had have told me". Why make your work for yourself when "If had told me" does the job perfectly well?

And even worse 'If he had of told me' Envy (not envy).

ErrolTheDragon · 20/07/2025 11:20

TaborlinTheGreat · 20/07/2025 10:41

That one's illogical though. There's nothing at all unfamiliar or difficult about the sound combination 'clear' on the end of 'nuclear'. 'Clear' is a common word. The stress/emphasis is different from how it is in 'nuclear', but the sounds and mouth positions are identical. Arguably 'nucular' is harder to say!

It’s even more illogical when you consider that obviously it’s directly related to and pronounced congruently with ‘nucleus’. Afaik that doesn’t get mangled.

Hallywally · 20/07/2025 11:24

I generally have a fairly good grasp of the English language but I genuinely thought the word was “slither”. I feel slightly embarrassed! 🤣

ErrolTheDragon · 20/07/2025 11:25

SamiSnail · 20/07/2025 10:53

Do you say clear as cle-ar , too?

As in the sentence "let me make it clear." Do you say, let me make it cle-AH?

If not, why pronounce nuclear (new-clear) as new-cle-ah?

just say nucleus first (nu - cle - us) and then it’s obvious it’s not new-clear it’s nu - cle -ar

Ohnobackagain · 20/07/2025 11:25

Mixing up averse and adverse @AlertCat

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 20/07/2025 11:26

SamiSnail · 20/07/2025 10:53

Do you say clear as cle-ar , too?

As in the sentence "let me make it clear." Do you say, let me make it cle-AH?

If not, why pronounce nuclear (new-clear) as new-cle-ah?

Yes. I say clear as two syllables..

SamiSnail · 20/07/2025 11:29

ErrolTheDragon · 20/07/2025 11:25

just say nucleus first (nu - cle - us) and then it’s obvious it’s not new-clear it’s nu - cle -ar

That is because the 'us' is pronounced separately in all words etc virus. The Cambridge dictionary shows it is nu-clear. It's only the yanks that say cle-ar.

https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/nuclear

SamiSnail · 20/07/2025 11:34

Also, you don't say he-ar for hear or de-ar for dear etc. No word in the English language has clear pronounced as cle-ar. No matter the circumstances of the word. It's bad grammar and bad English. As the dictionary shows, it's wrong.

Foreverm0re · 20/07/2025 11:35

I’ve just read ‘suporst’ instead of supposed 🙈

Ponoka7 · 20/07/2025 11:35

Internaut · 20/07/2025 09:58

WHY does MN have this double standard, though? Apparently it's absolutely fine to tell other people they're getting it badly wrong in terms of parenting, relationships, cleaning, catering, washing, driving, health care, diet, drinking, financial management, you name it - but dare to suggest that "could of" is to be avoided and apparently you've committed a major crime. It's so hypocritical.

People are posting for an opinion on their situation, not how well written their dilemma is. MN is for everyone, people who struggle with literacy, whose first language isn't English, who use dialect, who have LD's and people who are in distress, so get grammar wrong. Those who struggle with comprehension, just need to leave answering the post to others.

Squarestones · 20/07/2025 11:36

I'm not sure if this is actually incorrect so hoping someone reliable on this thread can help but I absolutely hate the use of 'gifted' instead of just given. I only remember it emerging in the last five - ten years largely on social media but I see it more and more. Generally feels like the person is trying to make a gift seem more special which maybe I shouldn't get worked up about but we have a perfectly good verb already.

SamiSnail · 20/07/2025 11:39

Ponoka7 · 20/07/2025 11:35

People are posting for an opinion on their situation, not how well written their dilemma is. MN is for everyone, people who struggle with literacy, whose first language isn't English, who use dialect, who have LD's and people who are in distress, so get grammar wrong. Those who struggle with comprehension, just need to leave answering the post to others.

But it helps people to learn the correct way to speak/write. You're not doing that person who struggles with literacy any favours at all by allowing them to continue like that and no one telling them the proper way.

It's actually cruel, I feel.

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