AIBU to be mad at his speed?

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So DH like his cars. We are middle aged and have responsibilities including one teenager dd still at home and both have professional jobs where we need to be able to commute and could not wfh.
He drives classic sports cars a lot and yes he is very good at driving, however driving his normal everyday car he often breaks the speed limit.
I have repeatedly, and I mean repeatedly asked him nicely, not so nicely and eventually shouted and told him to pull over because I don’t feel comfortable on the long drives we have to do with him driving fast. This has happened dozens of times. I admit I’m not confident on a motorway but we have agreed a compromise that he doesn’t go over 70 as it’s the national speed limit and there for a reason. It’s not just about him it’s other lives on the road.
He now has 9 points on his license. I have again approached him with my concern about this but he nods and says he understands and will watch his speed but he doesn’t. I’ve said that I don’t feel he has learnt from the speed awareness courses or the fine he can well afford. I feel like he thinks is he’s above the law and that really concerns me. He just politely dismisses me.
That and the fact that it’s the only thing I have raised my voice over repeatedly and I’m his wife and he continues to push it and ignore my ask.
Hes just taken my daughter somewhere and the very last thing I said on the drive was “ please drive under 70 and stay safe you have xxx in the car”
DD is autistic and doesnt like cars at the best of times but she has just sent me a screen shot of the speedometer at 78
Im so angry with him.
He slowed down now and they have arrived but AIBU to be fuming?
I am so upset that he has completely ignored me and basically lied also. Does everyone really drive at 80 because lots of cars do pass us on the motorway when we are at 70 and perhaps I’m being unreasonable I’d be interested. Thanks MN

I’d be annoyed about all the points as that would suggest to me that he’s a careless and unobservant driver, but 78 on a motorway wouldn’t bother me.

What does he plan to do when he loses his licence? It's only a matter of time.

YABU. Speeds in excess of 100mph are safe on quiet motorways in any modern car. Not everyone has the risk tolerance of a frightened dear.

This.

As someone who has gone from being a confident driver to someone who rarely drives after my car was smashed into little pieces by a speeding driver three years ago, I wouldn’t tolerate this. I hope he loses his licence.

I would be doing all driving for dd as I wouldn’t trust him. Maybe when he loses his license he might learn.

A competent driver going 80/5mph (even 90 - but I can already see the clutching of pearls) on a motorway in good weather, in a well maintained car and moderate traffic isn’t unsafe.

So many aren't competent though. They don't leave big enough gaps & often don't indicate.

I do frequently drive over 70mph on the motorway, as do many, but if I had 9 points on my license and my job depended on me driving then I wouldn’t be going over 70 at all. He is an idiot risking it, when it impacts the whole family not just him if he is disqualified from driving for a year or two.

It's not so much the speed that's dangerous- it's his arrogance. He thinks he's invincible. Only a matter of time before he's proved wrong.
Hopefully he'll be caught again and banned before anything bad happens.

Just Don’t get in the car with him. That’s the clearest message for him. If he’s incapable or unwilling to stick to the speed limit, with 9 points on his licence already, he’s choosing his behaviour.
Choose yours.

@BreadInCaptivity Car technology may have improved but humans are still stupid. Our reaction times are still the same.

Having said that 78 on a motorway in clear conditions wouldn’t bother me that much.

The real issue is people doing 80/90 mph and then driving aggressively.

Please stop driving, your attitude is appalling.

On the one hand 78mph on the motorway is nothing really. Actual speed would probably be 72 or 73 mph. I thought he was going to be doing 80 or 90 regularly based on how angry your post started and you shouting at him in the car. What speeds does he do on 30/ 40 mph sections?

Many people do a lot more on the motorway and sometimes it does makes sense when doing an overtake to get it over with and back in a lane. If you end up driving at 70mph in lane 3 you will get tailgated by impatient drivers and some will try to undertake.

On the other if he already has 9 points he should be winding his neck in as he can't risk another fine / more points

Where did he get the points? Probably not on the motorway. I’d be much more concerned about going over the limit in residential areas. Can you drive on long journeys?

You need to have the conversation about the next speeding ticket meaning the loss of his license.

How's he going to feel about not being able to drive his nice classic sports cars? How is he going to commute and how will his job be affected? What will it do to your marriage?

He seems to be totally oblivious to what losing his license will mean.

Fact: all speeding is illegal, no amount of self justification will ever change that. It's up to individuals how much it bothers them that they drive illegally. 75 on the motorway? Unless you are doing something else to get the attention of the police I'd say you'd never get "done" for that. Unfortunately that's the exact mentality that has the majority still driving at 35 in 30 limits and 45+ in 40 limits, and thats where speeding needs to be policed yet never is. OP if that is what you mean by "always speeding" then stop yourself or anyone else getting in this selfish fuckers car, please.

I do get the point that the rules/ laws were set a long time ago when car technology was different but there were also a lot less cars in the road too

The fact he has 9 points would suggest he speeds in urban areas too which is not good. If you left it at that I think we would all agree you should be annoyed at DH.

The fact you said he was doing onky 78 and you're cautious yourself of motorways kind of undermines your annoyance. No criticism of those that don't drive but a lot of criticism of those that drive but are scared of motorways.

Like other people I adhere in a 30 or 40 as it's there for a reason. Motorway limits are outdated and nobody has ever been done under 80mph true GPS which is about 90mph on a car dial

Is he a dick about other things as well?

My XH was just like this, and it was just one more of his subtly controlling, passive-aggressive, stubborn behaviours.

I drive at 80 on the motorway. Modern cars can more than handle it. The limit should be raised imo

Well naturally 70 is the limit so he should do that however in reality is say

78 on a dry day on a motorway , assuming no aggressive or erratic dry is safe. 60 on a motorway in rain etc is more dangerous.
hence it’s about driving at a speed /syle suitable for the road conditions rather than a speed limit . 70 is no safer than 78 ( although is the speed limit (out of date) )

what does he drive like in town, is he aggressive driver

An indicated 78 is more likely to be 75/76 and completely reasonable. It’s extremely unlikely that he’s going to get done for speeding. I thought you were going to say he was doing 100+ everywhere.

As a child, the fastest I saw as a passenger was 155 on a quiet motorway. I also have a fond memory of doing 130 in an unmarked Sierra Sapphire Cosworth on the M6.

He's clearly not as good a driver as he thinks he is. Hopefully he's banned before he kills someone, it's often the arrogant, irresponsible ones that hurt the innocent unfortunately.

He'll lose his licence soon so the matter will be sorted.

Speeding on minor roads is a huge problem and dangerous.

I wouldn’t be driven by him and DD wouldn’t be getting in a car with him either.

You can’t control his behaviour, only your own. You need to advocate for DD.