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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that life seems better in rep of ireland?

725 replies

PunnyOliveTurtle · 18/07/2025 13:59

ok...hear me out...My DM is Irish and she has not been home in a good few years, I haven't been over since I was 15, I'm early 40's now. So i decided to bring her over to visit her sisters as they are all getting older...late 60s/early 70's.

I had a wonderful time. I caught up with all of my cousins...and here is where I noticed the divide...they all have gorgeous homes and I mean stunning! Some in the country, some in the town, all fab new builds or gutted and updated old houses. A couple in new housing estates which were FAB!!
One of my cousins has just bought a new home...her DH is driving a 2025 car, they are off on hols next week. I asked her if she won the lotto and she laughed saying she wished, savings are now depleted and she was "broke". I know she has no credit cards because she metioned that she didn't have one when we wer talking about booking dinner somewhere and they wanted to take a deposit.

They all have great jobs...a lot of them are teachers...like i was. But they are no where near as stressed as I was. They are on holidays already and have been with a few weeks.Some are nurses but work part time in private hospitals, others work in big pharma companies, banking etc.Their dh's also have great jobs, engineers, managers in tech/pharma, one owns a construction company, one is a farmer.
All and I mean ALL of their DC who are of uni age are in university...no student loans. They have a grant scheme apparently. None of my cousins themselves have student loans...they are in 30's to mid 50's. (Can you tell we had an in depth discussion on uni and fees etc!)
Their DC aged 15+ all have summer jobs...in a local chippy, local cafe, one on a farm etc. My 18 yr old cant get a job at all!!

Everything just seemed so positive there...and im sure its not but I cant put my finger on it...it really got me.
I'm struggling most months...this trip was part on credit card. DD looking to start uni and i dont know how I'm going to help her... I know they say dont compare and I know there must be those struggling in Ireland too but there seemed to be A LOT more money being thrown around.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
10
Clavinova · 18/07/2025 20:45

Abhannmor · 18/07/2025 20:09

Size isnt everything. Cork City is actually slightly smaller than Southend on Sea in population terms. But I know where I'd be going for a cultural or culinary experience , with all due respect.

Cork City's population is actually somewhat larger than Southend-on-Sea: 224,000 and 180,000. A better comparison might be Portsmouth (in size and location) - which does have an outstanding historic waterfront.

TheWeeDonkeyFella · 18/07/2025 20:50

Abhannmor · 18/07/2025 20:09

Size isnt everything. Cork City is actually slightly smaller than Southend on Sea in population terms. But I know where I'd be going for a cultural or culinary experience , with all due respect.

The bits of the Cork Midsummer Festival we caught was great!

SleeplessInsomniac · 18/07/2025 20:52

The population cut off for Cork city is laughable. They've gone half way to Limerick to include Blarney etc, and practically counting the seas on the other side. The population less than a decade ago was about 120k. They moved the boundaries for some reason or other.

EmeraldShamrock000 · 18/07/2025 20:57

It is the emperors new clothes. It was the same per 2007 crash.

Big houses, big cars, I suspect that 70% of those range rover vehicles are on finance.

Money, euros don't go far. Things are very expensive, food, health care, school supplies, childrens activities etc.

100 people at every house sale driving prices through the sky.

Tbf the elderly home care fair deal scheme for homeowners is outstanding but sadly becoming unsustainable as it was brought in the 90's.

America tarriff changes are terrifying. 100,000 living in insecure rental accommodation, 11000 homeless families, 700,000 in immigration accommodation.

Most hotel's are closed to the public.

Civil unrest in once small towns, eldery people protesting 24 hours at hotel's, drugs plentiful across the country , we're not much different than the UK, both countries are shit, high crime, low punishment, no prison space, selfish politicians.

Childcare is scarce and expensive. You can't find a nursery without a year waiting time for a baby. The home childminder scheme is apparently going to be introduced soon, leaving creche places scarce.

LipstickLessons · 18/07/2025 20:59

Itshardagain · 18/07/2025 20:22

What??! I’ve paid recently ( bill through the post) for an X-ray… there’s a list of prices per night in a hospital I was in recently !

From the citizens advice website:
Public in-patient and day service fees were abolished on 17 April 2023. This means that the daily charge for staying in hospital for public patients no longer applies from this date.

And:
If you are referred by your GP to attend outpatients as a public patient, you do not have to pay for this service. If you wish to attend a consultant in a private capacity, you must pay their fee.

I'm not sure why you were charged, I would look into it and double check before the gp refers you anywhere that they are referring you through the public system if that's the way you want to go.

www.citizensinformation.ie/en/health/health-services/gp-and-hospital-services/hospital-charges/

AleaEim · 18/07/2025 21:01

I just came back from visiting Ireland with family (I’m Irish) it was lovely, the weather was good for once so it really added to the beauty. I agree with you, everyone seems to be so chill compared to here, you can have jobs like teaching/ nursing and live very well compared to london. Everyone seems to always be travelling l, eating out, drinking/ shopping.. and all the uni graduates are off to the US or Australia for a year, life seems so good there. Dublin for example has sea and mountains as well as being quite a bustling city, that’s hard to find in other countries. How bed ther ate some negatives:

I’m Dublin born and bred and the furthest I go is Wicklow when I visit so I have limited knowledge of elsewhere ( although I lived in limerick for a year about 15 years ago). Don’t be fooled by the cheap uni fees, university is inaccessible for most young people, the points system means that a person who wants study art, languages or music has to get high grades in all subjects such as maths and science which may not come natural to them. There isn’t much adjustment for SEN either and many miss out on higher education because they can’t memorise all the textbooks thrown at them. Another issue with education, is that university have admin fees (which when I was in uni was about 2k each year and uni is 4 years over there). I was entitled to a grant as I was from a poor family but my school friends who were from working / middle class families couldn’t afford this and couldn’t get grants either. This is very different and backward compared to the loan system in the uk for education.

You have to pay for a GP, schoolbooks etc so higher pay doesn’t go far. However there is marriage tax which helps couples financially.

One thing that gets on my nerves when I visit Ireland is people’s inability to speak directly, people drop hints when they want something but don’t ask directly. If you are offered something, you’re deemed as rude for accepting it and if you say no to a cup of tea, you’re asked 100 times before they accept your decline. It’s infuriating.

Irish people can be quite ignorant and insular when it comes to other cultures although I think that’s changing in the the big cities.

Most kids activities are expensive, not much is free. All the farms/ zoos, baby classes are to be paid for whereas here there’s endless children’s centres, farms, free festivals etc.

Hollyhobbi · 18/07/2025 21:04

I’m been in A&E a lot over the last few years. If you are admitted into a ward you don’t have to pay. If you self refer it’s €100 without a GP referral letter and you are not admitted to a ward.

EmeraldShamrock000 · 18/07/2025 21:07

LipstickLessons · 18/07/2025 20:59

From the citizens advice website:
Public in-patient and day service fees were abolished on 17 April 2023. This means that the daily charge for staying in hospital for public patients no longer applies from this date.

And:
If you are referred by your GP to attend outpatients as a public patient, you do not have to pay for this service. If you wish to attend a consultant in a private capacity, you must pay their fee.

I'm not sure why you were charged, I would look into it and double check before the gp refers you anywhere that they are referring you through the public system if that's the way you want to go.

www.citizensinformation.ie/en/health/health-services/gp-and-hospital-services/hospital-charges/

There is the option to pay, DH was waiting 5 months, as it wasn't an emergency, I waited a year on the ultrasound on the public list.

I have had 2 CT scans referred by GP, 220 euro each, 60 euro GP fee, not covered without a medical card.

DH 2nd xray, 150, deemed non emergency though he couldn't put his foot down so couldn't wait months.

Emergency urgent xrays are done quickly.

DS in a&e last month 100 euro.

Day, outpatient, free, overnight stays are 100 per night, maximum €1000 per year.

Martymcfly24 · 18/07/2025 21:14

@AleaEim
Just in regards to your point regarding University being inaccessible for most young people
Ireland has one of the highest rates of tertiary education in the world , higher than the UK.
The points system is one of the fairest, no interview no way of knowing what school you went to or who your father is . It is simply based on results.
Science is an optional subject there is no need to study it and while maths has to be passed it can be the 7th subject so points do not have to be counted.
Leaving Cert Applied and Leaving Cert Vocational Program are two alternatives and excellent for anyone with SEN but candidate can apply for certain exemptions.
Also school books are now free.

LipstickLessons · 18/07/2025 21:16

EmeraldShamrock000 · 18/07/2025 21:07

There is the option to pay, DH was waiting 5 months, as it wasn't an emergency, I waited a year on the ultrasound on the public list.

I have had 2 CT scans referred by GP, 220 euro each, 60 euro GP fee, not covered without a medical card.

DH 2nd xray, 150, deemed non emergency though he couldn't put his foot down so couldn't wait months.

Emergency urgent xrays are done quickly.

DS in a&e last month 100 euro.

Day, outpatient, free, overnight stays are 100 per night, maximum €1000 per year.

Yeah my GP always asks if we want to be referred to the public system or private. You can pay if you want to but we are obviously lucky, we have never needed to go private.

Times obviously vary massively across the country. I had a non emergency ultrasound done last month under the public system(was actually done in a Laya clinic for free in the end) and was waiting about 3 weeks.

Overnight stays are free now if you are public. That changed in the budget a few years ago.

ItWasCalledYellow · 18/07/2025 21:17

@NoSoupForU It is not rose tinted glasses actually, Ireland is a very wealthy country now with a very high standard of living. Like OP has said majority of college students have no loans making it much easier to get on property ladder despite the high cost of living.

Public and Civil Service jobs are very well paid in comparison to the UK. There is a large amount of pharma, IT and professional services jobs available. Teaching us a fantastic career in Ireland and almost double the pay of UK!

EmeraldShamrock000 · 18/07/2025 21:19

@LipstickLessons I didn't realise the overnight charge was abolished.
That's a bonus.

Evaka · 18/07/2025 21:19

WallTree · 18/07/2025 20:24

No, I come back to Ireland for extended periods of time each year. It's a bit of a wasteland in terms of things to do. Look up "10 things to do in Dublin" and you get book of Kells, Kilmainham, Guinness Storehouse...that's about it. And that's the capital city!

Lol, why are you following lists of the most visited sites by tourist mobs. You'll get Buckingham Palace and Tower of London reccos if you do the same search there.

DoYouReally · 18/07/2025 21:49

There is so many in accuracies on this thread it's difficult to know where to start.

Dublin is not a shithole first firstly. Yes, since covid and with a rapidly expanding population, it has definitely got a lot rougher in parts, especially the North Inner city but the rest of it is pretty ok and a lot of the suburbs are very nice. It's the same as any largely populated area, it has some areas that I wouldn't feel safe in walking at night but others were I would feel perfectly safe.
There's also an increased use of cocaine which has led to more aggression in some areas. Dublin is one of the strangest places I knlw of where walking less than 5 minutes away will have a totally different atmosphere and house pricing differential.

Ireland has no potholes?! Where we you on the M50 for your full stay? Ask anyone in rural Ireland or an mechanic in the country and they won't be long telling you. Main roads are good, minor roads not so much and there are still a number of accidents black spots around the country that haven't been fixed.

Education - yes our education system is considered one of the best in Europe. Teaching is easier than the UK & relatively well paid & holidays are longer. Third level is considered "free" - it's not really free but the majority of students manage either by parental funding or are eligible for a grant. Student loans are nothing like in the UK.
Also the poster who talked about multiple people falling the Leaving cert - that's grossly in accurate. It's very tiny portion of people who fail.

Health - we have to paid for GP & it's €70 in Dublin, €40 for blood tests in most of Dublin. A lot of waiting lists are long. Private health insurance is really worth having if someone can afford it. Dentists have long waiting lists and female contraception & HRT have recently become free. Waiting lists are extremely long especially with a lot of children's requirements.

Employment - we are at near full employment which really isn't going to last forever. It is also the quality of our educated workforce, the fact we speak English and are in the EU that makes us attractive for foreign direct investment. Yes the tax position does help but it's not the sole reason - to say otherwise is disingenuous.

Racism - anti English sentiment isn't the norm at all but it is evident in some places but they are a minority.
There is certainly a negative feeling towards those who want to come hear and not contribute but the average person is very accepting of foreigners who want to come to work, contribute, pay taxes and obey the law.

They are two sepearate categories & saying Ireland has a rascism problem is incorrect.

Housing - almost impossible to rent or to but due to a lack of supply. We need about 50,000 new house/apps a year to match supply...we are building about 30,000 and that's after a significant climb. It's not unusual for a property to sell for at least 100k over the asking price. Property in Ireland, unless in the very remote areas, just isn't value for money anymore.

Wages - wages appear very good but it's one of the most expensive countries in Europe so it's pretty quickly eroded. Electricity, Gas & Fuel costs are some of the highest in Europe.

Weather - yes it rains a lot but this Summer has been one of the better ones and it's also far better on the west coast than east even though they are about 2.5hrs apart!

It's not perfect but it's not bad either but it's very unlikely to be sustainable and in a lot like 2007 again.

Our celtic tiger was just a cat on steroids as they say. The higher you climb, the further people fall. Household debt and levels of credit are nowhere near where they were in 2007 so we are better positioned if the event of any ecomomic downturn but there is undoubtedly a dependency on taxes from a number of concentrated companies.

AleaEim · 18/07/2025 22:12

Martymcfly24 · 18/07/2025 21:14

@AleaEim
Just in regards to your point regarding University being inaccessible for most young people
Ireland has one of the highest rates of tertiary education in the world , higher than the UK.
The points system is one of the fairest, no interview no way of knowing what school you went to or who your father is . It is simply based on results.
Science is an optional subject there is no need to study it and while maths has to be passed it can be the 7th subject so points do not have to be counted.
Leaving Cert Applied and Leaving Cert Vocational Program are two alternatives and excellent for anyone with SEN but candidate can apply for certain exemptions.
Also school books are now free.

My post here is not opinion based, it’s based on lived experience. I went to a shit school and had uneducated parents who couldn’t help me with study strategies or afford tutoring for me. Despite being quite studious, I only got 300 points, too low for most university courses. Fast forward 10 years later, I decided to do a foundation degree in the UK as a mature student. My leaving cert didn’t matter here, nobody cared about what grades I got on irrelevant subjects. I got on to my degree as a mature student with no experience in the field. If I wanted to do that in Ireland, I would have had to do a PLC course for 2 years to get onto a 4 year degree so 6 years altogether just to get a degree, I would also had to pay the admin fees upfront. I paid nothing here until I was earning enough after I finished, and even that is just comes out of my salary like a tax. I’m now on a doctoral course. I would never have had this opportunity in my own country, education is for the middle classes in Ireland, people who come from educated families, with money for tutoring. Turns out I have neurodiversity, the support I get here in my studies is far superior to the support I would get in Ireland.

Martymcfly24 · 18/07/2025 22:20

@AleaEim I was the first person in my immediate and extended family to sit the Leaving Cert. Both parents worked in unskilled jobs. I went to a Deis Band 1 school. I missed teaching by 20 points my first year and repeated my LC. Got it the second year and I worked to put myself through college a couple of hours away. Parents helped as much as possible.Completed a masters while teaching.

Look I'm not dismissing your lived experience at all. We all have our own story, I just don't think it's fair to say that education is inaccessible only for middle class families when this is not my experience at all.

Abhannmor · 18/07/2025 22:20

Clavinova · 18/07/2025 20:45

Cork City's population is actually somewhat larger than Southend-on-Sea: 224,000 and 180,000. A better comparison might be Portsmouth (in size and location) - which does have an outstanding historic waterfront.

Southend was 272k on some internet thingy? I suppose it's the way they count em. Cork has bigged itself up lately , including outlying places. Yes , Portsmouth or Plymouth might be closer. I was in the latter last summer. Desperately needs some TLC. Great potential but quite derelict in parts. Is this the future for city centres I wonder. Abandoned to their fates....

Strawbsplease · 18/07/2025 22:38

AleaEim · 18/07/2025 22:12

My post here is not opinion based, it’s based on lived experience. I went to a shit school and had uneducated parents who couldn’t help me with study strategies or afford tutoring for me. Despite being quite studious, I only got 300 points, too low for most university courses. Fast forward 10 years later, I decided to do a foundation degree in the UK as a mature student. My leaving cert didn’t matter here, nobody cared about what grades I got on irrelevant subjects. I got on to my degree as a mature student with no experience in the field. If I wanted to do that in Ireland, I would have had to do a PLC course for 2 years to get onto a 4 year degree so 6 years altogether just to get a degree, I would also had to pay the admin fees upfront. I paid nothing here until I was earning enough after I finished, and even that is just comes out of my salary like a tax. I’m now on a doctoral course. I would never have had this opportunity in my own country, education is for the middle classes in Ireland, people who come from educated families, with money for tutoring. Turns out I have neurodiversity, the support I get here in my studies is far superior to the support I would get in Ireland.

Nah, I grew up in one of the most undesirable areas of Dublin with parents who didn’t progress past primary school and I got into university on my own merit. The points system is far fairer than an interview to establish if you’re from the ‘right’ school as happens in the UK.

rosyvalentine · 18/07/2025 23:00

TheKeatingFive · 18/07/2025 15:16

It's hard to convey the impact that the housing crisis has on people's lives though. It's massive.

I know people who've had to move in with their parents for 2/3 years, more even, to save for a deposit. These will be couples with small children, moving into their parents smallish homes for that time.

Many more who have given up on any idea of owning.

We will want to trade up to a decent sized family home in Dublin very soon, currently we're in a two and a half bed ex council. I'm talking like three proper bedrooms, a garden, nothing spectacular.

It will cost us north of a million euro for that in the areas we're looking at, which aren't particularly upmarket. We'll almost certainly have to sell our current house and rent in the meantime to be in with a chance of securing anything. Any house we buy will need work and cost of building is extortionate also.

My friend has just been through all this and it took her two years end to end. The process is so slow and cumbersome. We're very lucky to be able to even contemplate a move, but I'm looking at the whole process with such dread.

I'm in Dublin and I agree that housing is expensive and often overpriced, but over a million € for a 3 bedroom house??! Where are you trying to buy?! Unless it's a 3 bedroom mews in D4, that sounds crazy.

Yabberwok · 18/07/2025 23:00

Aworldofwonder · 18/07/2025 15:23

Excuse my ignorance but how is the UK going to use Ireland as a bargaining chip?

By stopping any exports to Ireland via the UK (northern Ireland) so everything has to be shipped out of mainland Europe around Britain to Ireland

rosyvalentine · 18/07/2025 23:04

Mitara · 18/07/2025 15:21

I am living in England now.

Getting to see a doctor for free , is definitely a lot nicer than paying 75 euro per visit to see a Doctor in Ireland.

Yet everyone complains about the NHS in the UK. They don't know how good they have it...

Edited

But it's only nicer if you can actually get an appointment! Like other PPs have said, we can usually get an appointment in Ireland within 24-48 hours. I've seen posts on MN with people in the UK waiting for literally weeks for a GP appointment.

Yabberwok · 18/07/2025 23:05

2024onwardsandup · 18/07/2025 15:50

Butt he infrastructure spending has achieved its goal of making Ireland well placed for economic growth. As compared to the UK….

But it has to be maintained... Britain lead the world in the industrial revolution..but Tony benn noted in his diary in 1961 he was, as minister of trade, inspecting machines made in the 1860s... Japan and Germany stole a march on the UK because of American investment post ww2 (the us couldn't forsee them smashing the us market too)

FortheloveofCheesus · 18/07/2025 23:15

Ireland is certainly a lot wealthier than the UK, GDP per capita is roughly twice what it is in the UK I think.

This doesnt mean the average Irish resident is richer. A huge chunk of that gdp is financing and tech income flowing through Ireland for tax purposes (a lot of which was for historic reasons).

Teaching salaries for example aren't actually miles higher than England, however housing in many places is cheaper so a better lifestyle might be afforded on the wage.

Dontlletmedownbruce · 18/07/2025 23:22

@AleaEim I had to laugh about what you said about indirect speech. It's so true and such a random stupid cultural thing. I've often said it must be the worst country to be neurodiverse in. I'm surprised this was very obvious to someone from the UK as there would be some similarities like the need to be polite to avoid confrontation. I have some family members who are Belgian and Dutch and this drives them mad. I also have lots of Eastern European colleagues who say the same thing. That said I am always a bit taken aback at the directness and abruptness of other European cultures but on balance find its a positive thing especially in the workplace.

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