Constance Marten case — I feel the police have some responsibility too

[Siff]

I know Constance Marten and her partner made dangerous and illegal choices, and I’m not excusing that — a baby died and that’s heartbreaking. But I can’t stop thinking about the way the case was handled and whether the police have some responsibility in how things unfolded.

As a mum of four who’s struggled mentally after birth, I keep thinking: if I had just given birth, was vulnerable, and felt like the whole world was hunting me down — would I have thought clearly? Probably not. The media coverage was intense, and the police were everywhere. The pressure must have been overwhelming.

I honestly believe the fear created by the police operation pushed them into making more and more desperate and risky decisions to stay hidden. It wasn’t just a search — it felt like a witch hunt. No safeguarding, no attempt to reach her as a vulnerable mother, just a hard push to capture and punish.

I think that approach had consequences. The police must take some responsibility for creating the kind of fear and pressure that led to this tragedy. The way they went about it likely made things worse — not better — for the baby.

It’s easy to say she was selfish or unstable, but mental health in the postnatal period is fragile. People don’t always think rationally when terrified. I just wish there had been more humanity in how it was all handled.
Anyone else feel the same?

There was a second attack some weeks later and the husband was at home (unexpectedly) and was able to stop MG but MG had come armed with a spade and seriously injured the husband with it.

Adults can be vulnerable.

I'm not saying she was necessarily, but it's shortsighted to think that only children are vulnerable. There are many vulnerable adults.

He started raping women at knifepoint aged 14. So i can understand if there were family concerns.

But the kids were removed because when she was pregnant with the 2nd or 3rd he threw her from a window, about 20ft. She hit a car. Torn her spleen and had internal bleeding. Then he tried to prevent the paramedics attending her.

When she went to hospital - pregnant and almost killed. He pushed for her to be discharged and despite the Drs saying she could die, she agreed with him. The authorities thought he could and would kill those babies. And she kept picking him.

I do think shes a DV victim and likely vulnerable, no one in their right mind would want that monster to father their children. If she wanted to be a mother, she should have left him. And I understand why she mightnt have been well enough to do that, but she absolutely did NOT do everything she could to be a mother. I.e. leaving him and pursuing access to the kids she already had.

Its astonishing you blame the police, SS and her family. But not the violent man she picked over her children time and again. And with poor Victoria, they dont know she wasnt suffocated deliberately. They cannot prove murder so have gone with manslaughter but only those two know what happened to result with that baby being dumped in shopping bag

My point was in what way was she vulnerable? People keep saying that she was. She was a physically healthy and independent woman in her 30s with financial backup and no known mental illness. Or could she have just been arrogant, selfish and entitled? It’s become one of those salad words that often means nothing. I think it’s trotted out her because she’s a woman. Amber Hurd is another example (where the truth proved somewhat different).

"Keeping the family together" when a parent is as disturbed as this is doing the child no favours at all.

In their favour, they were probably at their wits' end.

But her mother taking her to their disturbing cult in Africa, and leaving her there, does not shout "Caring parent!"

Yeah, let's blame the police and social services who as far as I can see did EVERYTHING they could to help this woman. And protect her existing children. Posts like yours OP are exactly why we're fucked as a society, because we want to point the finger at professionals who are doing their very best to help people.

I've not the full thread so this may have been covered, but how come when he was sent back to the UK he didn't serve more of his sentence? I'm not sure how this works but he had only served 20 years of a 40 year sentence. Surely he should have served some more of that, even if only 10 years.

Hoping someone knows how this all works.

Edited for typo and for clarity

Their "bond" and behaviours puts me in mind of a Folie à deux. Of course I am not attempting to diagnose them but they share such extreme, entrenched and tangled beliefs that there must be some profound co-dependent stuff going on. It is no excuse for their abhorrent and cruel neglect of baby Victoria which led to her tragic death. The way they treated her body made me feel sick, if only she had been found alive and had the chance to be placed with a loving family.

I didn't say she was vulnerable.

In fact I specifically said "I'm not saying she was".

When you're so invested in the row that you can't read the post you're quoting properly it's generally time to step away I find.

From what I’ve read she could have been trying to help her get back on track after difficult teenage years ….

Before I say more, I want to be clear, I still believe she bears full responsibility for her actions. In my view, she is entitled, has likely always had her own way, and may well believe she’s more intelligent than those around her.

That said, I do believe she was vulnerable to falling into a coercive, abusive and controlling relationship. Her background paints a picture of instability and deep indoctrination. At the age of 9 her father abandoned the family. Not long after, her mother became deeply involved in an evangelical Christian church, bringing Constance along with her. Eventually, her mother took her to Lagos on a so-called ‘mission’ linked to what is now widely considered a cult. The group’s leader has been reported to have abused his Western followers. This happened when Constance was around 19, her mother returned to the UK leaving her behind in Nigeria. By that point, Constance had experienced a full decade of emotional chaos and religious extremism.

Mark didn’t disclose his criminal conviction until they were ‘married’ in Peru and she was already pregnant. By then, she had severed ties with her friends and family.

I believe that if she had never met MG, and had instead found herself in a healthy relationship, this tragic outcome might not have occurred. It’s possible, of course, that she has a pattern of being drawn to toxic dynamics, but in MG's case, I believe he would have been abusive in any relationship he was in, and that any children in his care would likely have been at risk.

None of this is to excuse her behaviour, it remains deeply troubling and indefensible. But the situation is undeniably complex. Perhaps, as a woman and as a mother, I find it almost impossible to comprehend how another mother could allow this to happen. And maybe, at its simplest and most horrifying, the truth is that they were both just… evil and by saying she's 'vulnerable' I'm just trying to justify how a mother could do it....I dunno. It's so so sad.

She was clearly vulnerable. Money does guarantee good mental health, her DM brought her to Africa to tame her, when she was most like ill to begin with, instead she was abused, falling in love with a convicted rapist is not normal behaviour either.

It was probably more about rebellion than actually wanting to parent the baby. They probably bonded over how "it's us against the world" and "nobody tells us what to do".

I see that, I know you weren’t saying that. The question was for people generally, since people keep using the line that she was vulnerable. I don’t think I said people can never be vulnerable either btw.

Damned if they do and damned if they don’t. The people responsible are people who have been found guilty. Nothing more and nothing less!

OP you sound like a bleeding heart with no real life experience. Don’t be so naive. Them and only them are at fault. People need to start taking full responsibility for their actions. Don’t excuse this horrendous pair by blaming the police. Your sympathy should lie with those poor children. All of them, not just baby Constance. Hopefully they will stop having children now,poor things don’t stand a chance with parents like that.

You don’t have anywhere near enough information to even begin to question the police tactics. Just another day, another police bashing thread on Mumsnet

There was absolutely no evidence she was “abused”. In fact the BBC today said that there is no evidence of this at all. There is no evidence that she was “clearly vulnerable” either. It’s incredible how people are excusing her behaviour.

Fucking boring mentality isn’t it? Why does it always have to be someone else’s fault.. do the police and social services etc need to wipe everyone arses for them ffs so sick of this blame society!

Haha...OK...so we cite Amber Heard as an example here. OK. Two things can be true, someone can be a total prick (to put it lightly) and also be a victim too. But it seems we like to fit people in boxes of good vs evil and there is to be no grey in between.

ok 😂

This just isn’t true - what actually happens is the mother is expected to leave the violent partner but consistently prioritises the man over her children. It’s not as black and white as it may seem and rightly the priority is to get the children out of a violent situation

Not as vulnerable as her baby. Who is now dead because of her choices

I know of a woman whose family took parental responsibility of her child in a private court case simply because they thought they could offer the child a more lavish lifestyle - more holidays, private schooling, tutors and private sports facilities.

No, you don't, @Pancakesandcream33, because I can guarantee that that never happened.

I would be inclined to agree with you, except I found an article that went into the previous children's adoptions.
The first baby was born in Wales, where she pretended to have an Irish accent, and pretending that ye wasn't the babies father. During that pregnancy an alert was raised because she was living out of a van, had initial booking in appointment then disappeared for 3 months.
When they clicked it was her, he beat up the two female police officers who attended the hospital. He went to prison for 20 months, she and the baby were placed together but under supervision, she left the baby in a flat alone. She didn't appear to be very attentive to the baby.
Then it seemed there were DV issues which saw the 2 babies removed.
They set up supervised visits, the couple didn't attend 19 of them.
3rd baby, she fell or was pushed out of the window, she was screaming for help inside the property they lived at, whilst he tried to turn paramedics away. They say she had no injuries, she had a torn spleen, and required a blood transfusion.
Baby was born during covid, she decided she was going out, left baby on the ward, was out overnight, and refused to do a covid test so they didn't let her back in and lost that baby too.

She had access to money. She decided not to buy a house.

If she was pregnant and concerned with having her baby taken away, why didn't she flee early in her pregnancy? Why didn't she go abroad and have her baby? Live in a house and provide a good, stable, happy upbringing for that child? Instead of fleeing to a tent in freezing cold conditions? Instead of having that poor baby underdressed for the weather? Instead of sleeping upright with baby on her, that lead to suffocation?
Why did she, at the end put that poor babies body into a shopping bag with dirty nappies?

I don't think she's been mistreated here at all. I feel for all 4 of her children who are victims of their parents feckless behaviour.

Agreed, all this "she's a vulnerable woman" bollocks does my head in, she's an evil piece of shit pure and simple.....that poor baby.