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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to think employers aren’t going nearly far enough with adjustments and that ableist attitudes are still totally normalised?

1000 replies

coffeeandmycats · 14/07/2025 18:09

I’m honestly so fed up with how “reasonable adjustments” are treated like some kind of special favour or workplace charity. They’re not. They’re a legal duty under the Equality Act, and they exist because without them, disabled people are shut out of employment or slowly squeezed out once they’re in.
Every time someone says “we couldn’t adjust the role” or “it wouldn’t be fair on the team,” what they usually mean is “we didn’t want to deal with it.” And that’s what drives me mad how often laziness, bias or lack of imagination is brushed off as “just being realistic.” That’s not realism. That’s ableism.
Most jobs can be adjusted. If someone can’t do one task but can do everything else why is the answer to push them out, instead of reshuffling the tasks or offering alternatives? We do this all the time in other settings. You wouldn’t chuck a kid out of school because they struggle with stairs. But in work, suddenly job specs are sacred texts.
And now, with the government trying to push more disabled people back into work (often with threats of benefit sanctions), where is the structural support? Employers still get to decide whether something is “reasonable,” even when they’ve shown time and again that they don’t understand or don’t care. That’s not a system that’s a gamble.
We should be encouraging every disabled person denied adjustments to take their employer straight to tribunal. I don’t care if it’s uncomfortable the law needs to be enforced. But also, it shouldn’t have to get that far. There should be an independent ombudsman-style service that employers must subscribe to something that can assess adjustment requests fairly and quickly, without making the disabled person go to war to be heard.
And honestly? If a business can’t afford to make space for disabled people, whether that’s with flexibility, equipment, transport help or task reallocation, then maybe they shouldn’t be in business. If your model only works when everyone is 100% able-bodied, then your model is broken. Shut it down.
AIBU to think we’ve got this totally backwards? That we’re still treating inclusion like a bonus feature instead of a basic requirement? That people who need adjustments are somehow seen as the problem instead of the systems and attitudes around them?
I’m sure this will rub some people the wrong way. Maybe that’s the point.

OP posts:
Gloriia · 15/07/2025 15:50

Digdongdoo · 15/07/2025 15:48

Sues the dog

Yes take fido and his owner to a tribunal and whoever's street the poo was on too it's their fault for not adjusting.

My19thNervousNameChange · 15/07/2025 15:51

OP if I got a job at your 'cat cafe' - which definitely exists - and then developed a severe phobia and anxiety about cats would you get rid of them for me?

coffeeandmycats · 15/07/2025 15:51

Pricelessadvice · 15/07/2025 15:50

Maybe he should look for a job where does might not be necessary? Pool lifeguard?

Did he turn up to the job interview barefoot?? Apologies if I missed this bit, I’ve been at work.

no it was on teams

OP posts:
Gloriia · 15/07/2025 15:52

Pricelessadvice · 15/07/2025 15:50

Maybe he should look for a job where does might not be necessary? Pool lifeguard?

Did he turn up to the job interview barefoot?? Apologies if I missed this bit, I’ve been at work.

No no it was on teams. Feet out of sight.

Digdongdoo · 15/07/2025 15:52

Gloriia · 15/07/2025 15:50

Yes take fido and his owner to a tribunal and whoever's street the poo was on too it's their fault for not adjusting.

Edited

Make the council pay for foam pavements (that he didn't actually ask for) and then move house too. For good measure.

coffeeandmycats · 15/07/2025 15:52

I feel this thread has devolved into bullying my disabled uncle for having a foot condition...

OP posts:
coffeeandmycats · 15/07/2025 15:53

why are people so hung up about someone having their feet out at work?

OP posts:
Pricelessadvice · 15/07/2025 15:53

coffeeandmycats · 15/07/2025 15:51

no it was on teams

Did he make them aware at interview that he couldn’t wear shoes so would need to be barefoot in the office? Or was it a case of ‘get the job and demand later’?

My19thNervousNameChange · 15/07/2025 15:53

coffeeandmycats · 15/07/2025 15:52

I feel this thread has devolved into bullying my disabled uncle for having a foot condition...

Oh look! A shark! Grin

Pricelessadvice · 15/07/2025 15:53

coffeeandmycats · 15/07/2025 15:53

why are people so hung up about someone having their feet out at work?

Because it’s relevant to the thread.

Pricelessadvice · 15/07/2025 15:53

coffeeandmycats · 15/07/2025 15:53

why are people so hung up about someone having their feet out at work?

Because it’s relevant to the thread.

twistyizzy · 15/07/2025 15:54

coffeeandmycats · 15/07/2025 15:53

why are people so hung up about someone having their feet out at work?

Cos it's unhygienic and disgusting.
I have a foot phobia so seeing someone's bare feet in my workplace would severely traumatise me. At least I could sue the company though......

coronafiona · 15/07/2025 15:54

Totally agree

twistyizzy · 15/07/2025 15:55

coffeeandmycats · 15/07/2025 15:52

I feel this thread has devolved into bullying my disabled uncle for having a foot condition...

So are you going to sue us all?

SleeplessInWherever · 15/07/2025 15:55

coffeeandmycats · 15/07/2025 15:52

I feel this thread has devolved into bullying my disabled uncle for having a foot condition...

Oh, to clarify - no.

What people are at this point laughing at is your response to your uncles foot condition.

Like I said before - my stepson, SUPER autistic.

This morning he was angry the sun was “on,” shall I sue the sun?

He’s not going to be a scientist, who do I sue?

He’s currently upstairs shouting at bread. Warbutons better watch out.

The whole thing, and this approach to disability and just how much the world owes you because of it, is ridiculous.

coffeeandmycats · 15/07/2025 15:55

Pricelessadvice · 15/07/2025 15:53

Did he make them aware at interview that he couldn’t wear shoes so would need to be barefoot in the office? Or was it a case of ‘get the job and demand later’?

No he disclosed it the first time he attended the office.

OP posts:
Gloriia · 15/07/2025 15:56

Pricelessadvice · 15/07/2025 15:53

Did he make them aware at interview that he couldn’t wear shoes so would need to be barefoot in the office? Or was it a case of ‘get the job and demand later’?

Noooo because there's an act that the op mentioned a couple of time where this is not necessary. You get the job then reveal all.

Disclaimer I have a disabled relative I 100% support adjustments at work but this thread demonstrates why genuinely disabled people struggle at work because other people take the mick.

PawBroon86 · 15/07/2025 15:56

This has been very entertaining, thanks to all who have contributed. Looking forward to joining in the drinking game if the thread keeps going....

Wine! He could work in a vineyard with his bare feet, or is that done mechanically now?

dovetail22uk · 15/07/2025 15:56

coffeeandmycats · 14/07/2025 18:09

I’m honestly so fed up with how “reasonable adjustments” are treated like some kind of special favour or workplace charity. They’re not. They’re a legal duty under the Equality Act, and they exist because without them, disabled people are shut out of employment or slowly squeezed out once they’re in.
Every time someone says “we couldn’t adjust the role” or “it wouldn’t be fair on the team,” what they usually mean is “we didn’t want to deal with it.” And that’s what drives me mad how often laziness, bias or lack of imagination is brushed off as “just being realistic.” That’s not realism. That’s ableism.
Most jobs can be adjusted. If someone can’t do one task but can do everything else why is the answer to push them out, instead of reshuffling the tasks or offering alternatives? We do this all the time in other settings. You wouldn’t chuck a kid out of school because they struggle with stairs. But in work, suddenly job specs are sacred texts.
And now, with the government trying to push more disabled people back into work (often with threats of benefit sanctions), where is the structural support? Employers still get to decide whether something is “reasonable,” even when they’ve shown time and again that they don’t understand or don’t care. That’s not a system that’s a gamble.
We should be encouraging every disabled person denied adjustments to take their employer straight to tribunal. I don’t care if it’s uncomfortable the law needs to be enforced. But also, it shouldn’t have to get that far. There should be an independent ombudsman-style service that employers must subscribe to something that can assess adjustment requests fairly and quickly, without making the disabled person go to war to be heard.
And honestly? If a business can’t afford to make space for disabled people, whether that’s with flexibility, equipment, transport help or task reallocation, then maybe they shouldn’t be in business. If your model only works when everyone is 100% able-bodied, then your model is broken. Shut it down.
AIBU to think we’ve got this totally backwards? That we’re still treating inclusion like a bonus feature instead of a basic requirement? That people who need adjustments are somehow seen as the problem instead of the systems and attitudes around them?
I’m sure this will rub some people the wrong way. Maybe that’s the point.

Yes yes yes! YANBU. People don't get it or even try to get it when they have no experience and most people are wildly ableist. Doesn't affect them therefore they couldn't give a flying fck and anyone asking for accommodations for anything are just attention seeking. One manager at my work told one team member that he "couldn't have two members of his team that needed reasonable adjustments". Like, wtf?! These are legal requirements that employers HAVE to do - just to essentially put you on the same playing field as your colleagues and allow you to be able to do your job. I'm really fortunate (I guess) that I don't have a crappy boss as I'm disabled and autistic and have to work from home and need lots of adjustments. But I'm still working - people moan and moan about people not working but then think that we are being a*eholes when we want to work but need a little bit of extra help to do. Everyone is a t*t!

Gloriia · 15/07/2025 15:57

Digdongdoo · 15/07/2025 15:52

Make the council pay for foam pavements (that he didn't actually ask for) and then move house too. For good measure.

Good idea

XenoBitch · 15/07/2025 15:57

coffeeandmycats · 15/07/2025 15:53

why are people so hung up about someone having their feet out at work?

I hate feet, but I can just look away if someone has theirs out.

I think it is because your uncle could sue his workplace for getting injured as a result of being barefoot. I have a relative with a cleaning company. No WFH option, and shoes are a must as they will be working with chemicals on the floor and machinery.
If your uncle applied for a job with my relative, and disclosed the no shoes thing after being offered a job, would he have grounds to sue because he can't work from home, and is not allowed to be barefoot?

Mrsttcno1 · 15/07/2025 15:57

twistyizzy · 15/07/2025 15:55

So are you going to sue us all?

Don’t put ideas in his head, haven’t you heard of the equality act!!

SleeplessInWherever · 15/07/2025 15:58

Mrsttcno1 · 15/07/2025 15:57

Don’t put ideas in his head, haven’t you heard of the equality act!!

2010, in case anyone is confused.

Gloriia · 15/07/2025 15:58

PawBroon86 · 15/07/2025 15:56

This has been very entertaining, thanks to all who have contributed. Looking forward to joining in the drinking game if the thread keeps going....

Wine! He could work in a vineyard with his bare feet, or is that done mechanically now?

I'm still in 🍷

twistyizzy · 15/07/2025 15:58

Mrsttcno1 · 15/07/2025 15:57

Don’t put ideas in his head, haven’t you heard of the equality act!!

I don't recall it being mentioned....

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