To believe that 53 is not too old

[Whichroadtogodown]

To make a new start?

I have been caring for my SN DC for 20 years. They are now moving into supported living. It has been a long hard road of caring for them and securing supported living. It has been full on 24/7 care with barely any respite.
Now that a supported living place has become available, it leaves me lost.
I have no qualifications but will need to support myself financially after Surviving on carers allowance and UC.
I don't even know where to look for work anymore, let alone what I want to do. I would like an admin job if that is possible even if it meant starting at the bottom. I'm prepared for that. Every waking moment up until now has been taken up by my child's needs, hence why I haven't got anywhere career wise. I haven't slept properly in years. I am terrified of what the future holds for me. I have sacrificed everything to care for my child.
Any tips and advice welcome.
I would rather not work directly caring any longer because 20 years of caring has left me in complete burnout, but there's no time to recover or restore my energy. I need to train fast and find work that will support me. I need something that will support me financially.
I divorced 18 years ago and it has just been me on my own since then.
I admit I am at a very low ebb.
Please advise anything you think may help me?

I think if possible, you need to not rush. Can you take some time out to get rNr time for you for a bit?
Also maybe see a careers advisor.or similar (not sure of title) to get you think about doing a job in something you feel passionate about.

Before caring for my youngest child, I had my eldest child who also had complex SN but who is now living independently. 🥳
I had my first child when I was 20 so most of my CV is blank apart from a few jobs I had between 1988 and 1992.
I don't want to give up on life but I can't see the wood for the trees at the moment.

I apologise in advance for my stupid questions but where would I arrange to see a careers advisor?
I can afford to take a little time out but not sure how long before the wolf will be at the door.
I have no friends. My caring responsibilities wouldn't allow friendships and in some ways, this was OK with me because I am AuDHD.

You are not too old. Have a look at your local council website and see if they offer any employment support programmes - they will be able to help with your cv, look at transferrable skills and will know the demand areas where jobs are available. They may also be able to help you access free training and help with interview expenses etc.

I mentioned about friends because if I'd had friends, I'd have someone to ask my stupid questions to.
The world appears to have changed so much since I was last employed.

I'll do that now. Thank you.

You should get support from the job centre via your universal credit claim to help get you ready to work. Including courses, help writing cvs and help applying for jobs.

Natural to be scared after so long but remember that you’ve been using lots of skills over the years doing a fabulous job.

I hope at some point soon the fear will be replaced by something else - maybe even some excitement and fulfilment, finding yourself and developing new skills, new friends and enjoying your new independence.

Worth reflecting that ‘admin’ is not what it was - there is no filing, no typing, hardly any minute taking now due to CoPilot.

How much do you need to support yourself? Maybe start there and work out what range of jobs you could do that gives you what you need. Start small to ease yourself in, you can build from there.

Volunteering in a charity shop may be a good way into getting retail experience and a referee.

very best with your new direction!

Also maybe keep an eye on school vacancies for things like lunch time supervisors they can be a good foot in the door to other school related jobs and as a career I’m going to say you’ll be more than emotionally qualified when a little one scrapes their knee or falls out with Lucy at lunch break.

I have no advice but I think you have a wonderful attitude and I wish you lots of luck.

I wonder if something like this might be able to offer some help and advice

I know you’ve been caring, not unemployed per se, but the principle of helping people back to work is the same.

And no, while it might not be easy, it’s not too old to make a start on something. Good luck!

Op, I look after dogs for a living in my home - for people who don't like kennels. What about that? I'm fully booked all the time. The dogs are all gorgeous and I love them. I have also made some wonderful friendships with their owners. I charge £30 a dog, and have 4 staying every night. I also have a couple of dogs most days for daycare, bringing in another £20 each. So usually I make at least £160 a day. It's a lovely job, no qualifications required.

You usually need a licence from the council which costs £140 a year - although in some areas no licence is required. Also pet sitting insurance from Cliverton at £140 a year.

If it's something you'd consider, I could give you much more detailed info.

I recently did a few hours volunteering in a non caring role and enjoyed it. It might be a short term way of figuring out what you enjoy, what you are good at and gaining work experience too. It would also get you slowly back to working life. Ideally you could go then into part time employment unskilled and then work on getting your relevant qualifications to bring your income up a bit.

Plenty of charities would welcome you as a volunteer helping out with admin if you wanted to start building up some experience for your CV.

Sending you lots of good luck OP! Ofcourse you’re not too old , you have año the decade of work ahead of you. What type of environment do you like? How about looking at garden centres, supermarkets, self employed cleaning, restaurant work?

I don't know where you live OP but if you live in Scotland there's

https://www.skillsdevelopmentscotland.co.uk/

Some areas may also have local provision e.g. https://abzworks.co.uk/employability-support/

They offer career advice and often run courses in conjunction with local FE Colleges e.g. Computer basics.

If you're not in Scotland could you post roughly what region you are in and other posters may know of something local to you.

How about you simply browse job sites and see what gets you excited? Congratulations in advance op x

Your local library (should you be lucky enough to have one) should also have information on where you can get advice and may even run courses themselves.

Use the experience you have

care work
TA
Social work assistant (children or adults)
Shared lives carer
Foster carer
Respite carer
etc

Once you're in work and making links and contacts and building up your confidence, you can then look to branch out into other things

I think the OP has done quite enough caring as she said.

Good luck op. You've done an amazing job raising your family. Hope they settle into their new accommodation.

She has, but unless she has a secret stash of money somewhere to keep her going, she's going to need to get into a job quickly and the quickest route is those types of jobs where she will outrank most of them with her skills

Once she has built up a bit more confidence and new skills (the world of admin for example is not just copilot its extremely demanding) she can branch out

I'm in a similar situation with my teenager soon going to residential school. My life has been focused on him for so long as an only parent, I've forgotten what it is like to sleep or do something for myself. If you would like to chat, please message me. Would be lovely to have someone who gets how strange it is.

Hi OP. This was exactly the position my own mother was in. She cared for my severely autistic brother for 20 years unable to work until he moved into supported living 10 years ago. I know she started off with volunteering in charity shops and then this has now progressed into her having a full time paid position as a charity shop manager and she is loving it. She's now retirement age but has no plans on stopping anytime soon and is making up for lost time being stuck at home for so many years. Best of luck OP you can do it!!