Just normal politeness at the dentist is all I am asking for

[MsMarch]

DS is having private orthodontic treatment as the waiting list for NHS treatment is too long. This should NOT be relevant, but I admit, the insane amount of money it's costing us is probably impacting how I feel about this.

The reception staff are so incredibly unfriendly and unhelpful and it's really starting to wind me up. They don't say hello. If you ask a question they either look at you blankly or start to do it, but refuse to actually say anything. eg I asked if we could set up the next appointment and she didn't even look up. By the clicking, I assumed she was looking at the calendar. But after about 20 seconds of silence and no eye contact I had to say, "sorry, are you looking for an appointment" and she was quite snippy in her "yes, we're very busy".

When I took DS in this week I had to drop him as there'd been road works and we were late so I told him to tell them I was just parking the car. When I came in, buzzed to be let in. Waited. Waited. Waited. When I finally go tin, three staff in reception, 2 on the actual desk, so I admit, I was already a bit confused why I had to wait but anyway. I see DS isn't in the waiting area so I say, "Hi", in preparation to ask where he is, and they both just sit there, continuing to look at their computers. So after a few seconds, I'm like, "HIIIIIIII" and they look up, all confused and say, "we were just busy with something".

It's INFURIATING.

And the woman who did his braces was great so I have no complaints, but I won't lie, I would have lied to have been told that the actual orthodontist is NOT the person who would be doing it, but instead it would be a "therapist".

Am I just being ridiculously precious? I'm really getting very annoyed. DH had a similarly unpleasant experience while trying to set up the appointment in the first place.

Write to the practice manager, not as a complaint but just to let them know that they might want to get their reception staff some customer service training. You’re paying - they shouldn’t act as if they’re doing you a favour.

Write to the practice manager, not as a complaint but just to let them know that they might want to get their reception staff some customer service training. You’re paying - they shouldn’t act as if they’re doing you a favour.

Yep.
Acceptable in Poland.
Rude in the UK.
Adapt to the environment and societal norms ffs

My dentist receptionists are really nice and friendly. But one did ask me if I could manage the stairs! I am of a certain age, but not totally decrepit, it was in a good spirit though so I forgave.

Complain to the practice manager. I wish more people would.

I'm a dentist and I would absolutely complain about the reception staff being like this. There is absolutely no need to be rude to patients and it drives me mad as most negative reviews that GPs or dental practices get seem to be about reception!

My Polish friend doesn't think please and thank you are necessary. She has admitted that this might be causing her DS some problems as he's getting older.

I’m afraid it’s not so much a dentist issue as an ‘ex or current NHS worker issue’. There does seem to be a culture in certain quarters of treating patients as an inconvenience or nonentities at best and rudely and carelessly at worst. I do appreciate however that many members of the public are far from polite to the staff. It’s a shame that we can’t match up the rude ones and everyone else can have civilised encounters!

It’s noticeable to me how polite, friendly and pleasant the staff are at the private GP and hospital I’ve had to use recently. It makes it so much less of an ordeal when you’re already scared and worried. And they always ask for - and presumably act upon - feedback about your reception experience.

The receptionist at the orthodontist I took DD to didn’t even TRY to hide her contempt that we were NHS patients. I asked if it was possible for an after-school appointment and was told ‘No, those time slots are not available for NHS patients.’ And this was after I’d pulled DD out of school early for her appointment and then sat and waited over an hour to be seen (she could have stayed in school!).

The receptionists are all incredibly rude. No acknowledgement that we’d walked in. I actually asked which receptionist I should speak to as it was like all 3 of them were playing a game to see who could not talk to me or acknowledge me for the longest!

Yes I thought there was a two tier system and actually mentioned it to our orthodontist once and he was quite offended I suggested that NHS patients were treated differently!

At my usual dentist they are extremely pleasant. Any medical service should be, as you might be really nervous when you go in.

Given so many people can't get jobs at the moment you have to wonder why so many people are so crap at their jobs and how they are managing to keep them!

Yes we had that too. Unfortunately for them, my son's (state) school kept weird hours (for the UK) and I was able to get in at the very end of the "school time" slots so we used to get a 3pm slot. They also seemed incapable to running to time, although it wasn't always significantly delayed.

I've always found Eastern European hospitality staff extremely pleasant. A nurse at my GP practice is Polish and she's very nice too.

I’ve had similar at my dentist but I have noticed this as a general pattern in a lot of places. I have no problem waiting patiently to be attended to, but I think customer facing staff should greet customers. If they’re dealing with another customer, fine! I don’t expect them to stop what they’re doing to deal with me of course. But a polite “hello, I’ll be with you in just a moment!” is surely just basic manners? Or you know what, I’d even just take some eye contact 😂

I don't know what it is about dental staff.

90% of them seem to have the attitude that patients/parents are completely feckless and totally to blame for any deviation from perfect dentition and therefore the best approach is to shame and criticise. Do they learn it in training or something?

Doesn't make any sense. I have a lovely dentist now and she's the first person who has ever actually explained things in a way that makes sense and makes me want to be honest rather than just lie and be terrified they will find out I haven't been flossing or whatever. It's so stupid and counterproductive.

My lovely private dentist was, sadly, unable to continue to see me any more as he contracted a terminal illness.
I moved location and registered with another private dentist. When I went to the initial appointment, the reception staff completely ignored me. I waited at their desk and was there for about ten minutes whilst they discussed their holiday plans. Eventually, a dentist came down and beckoned me to follow her. She didn't take a history, prodded around in my mouth, spoke to the dental nurse in ?Latvian and said "Go make another appointment ". That cost me £75. I've never been back. I've got one tooth that can hurt, but I take aspirin and it settles down. I'm not going to be looking for another dentist any time soon.

I have to say that is not my experience. I am often at my local NHS hospital either for myself or to accompany my DP, and everyone is always very polite and courteous. So much so, that I usually email PALS to pay a compliment, and quite often that compliment is acknowledged at my next appointment, so I know I am making a difference. The person you are complimenting might be having a rotten day, and an acknowledgement from a grateful patient can turn their day around.

The only exception to this I can think of was back in December 2023, when I had to go for a Fibroscan appointment. The two members of staff were miserable and not particularly pleasant. Not enough for me to make a complaint, but enough to make sure they didn't get a compliment!

So, another week and another run in with these people. DS' wire came loose last week so I rang up to ask if we could make an appointment to get it sorted as it was bothering him quite a lot. I don't expect one instantly, but she basically said there's nothing for 3 weeks, was completely unsympathetic and acted like It was just one of those things becuase they're really busy. She told me they often can't fit any appointments in during the summer holidays because their staff are on leave and their teenagers often damage their braces at this time. To which I asked if they kno wit's a problem every year, why don't they plan for it better?!

I'm so annoyed. I can't do anything about this but I am going to complain in due course and in the short term I am going to tell our dentist who referred us that I recommend he finds a new orthodontic practice to refer to, and why.

Receptionists are uptight, social misfits with small person and mind complex and want everyone to be as miserable as they are and the NHS stating they won't tolerate abuse is laughable. They hire these bitter individuals as front facing staff and pretend we're all OK with being talked to like trash by these people for our 'free world class health care'.

All that to say, I hear you.

We had this. We went elsewhere and told them why.

I wonder if you go to my dentist. There's a private orthodontist practice in there, plus my dental practice which does NHS and DenPlan. The reception staff are so unbelievably rude. Completely ignore you waiting to book in, eyes on the computer screens, refusing to look up. I appreciate they must be busy, but a quick "I'll be right with you" would make all the difference.

OP, is it a 100% private dentist or is it a NHS dentist doing private work?

It makes a massive difference. The practices doing a mix of NHS/private work are pretty horrid when it comes to customer service - you get nothing extra for being private, not even basic courtesy. The one I used to go to was awful in every aspect - receptionists didn't bother answering the phone so you had to phone many times, and you'd get the same being ignored at the counter, and you get the same treatments being cancelled (usually by curt text) at short/no notice with no apology and then having to wait weeks again for a new appointment.

There's a World of difference if you go to a 100% private practice. The "Private" treatment costs are similar to having private treatments in an NHS practice, but you actually get some customer service. At the wholly private practice I now go to, the receptionists answer the phone within a couple of rings, are really pleasant, chatty, polite, etc., and highly efficient. The one time they had to cancel, the practice manager phoned personally to apologise and already had the appointments screen on her PC with a choice of re-booking options, just a few days later.

I's advise the OP to find a 100% private practice.

That reminds me of a receptionist we took on at the accountancy practice where I worked many years ago. She was hopeless and awful. Completely lazy and incompetent. She was "let go" after a couple of weeks.

A few years later, she turned up at our local GP surgery as one of their receptionists. Guess what? She was incompetent and hopeless and lazy. A few times over the years when I'd been waiting in the waiting room, she'd be having arguments with patients, often pulling the "I'm trying to help you" card when she was actually being unhelpful and obstructive and just not listening to the patient. If I phoned them and she answered, I'd just hang up and try again later as she was unhelpful and tried her best putting all her energies into not doing her job, not making appointments, not processing a repeat prescription. Thankfully she eventually retired, but really, the surgery should have done what my employer had done years before and sacked her!

Not a dentist but a recent NHS hospital appointment. I had waited months and eventually a letter arrived. Quite short notice and not easy to get to as i no longer drive.I made arrangements with a friend who could take me ,but not wait so I investigated public transport home.Three days before the appointment a letter arrived cancelling it. Weeks later another appointment arrived.It was on a day that was possibly difficult so i called the hospital. The woman huffed and puffed and sighed. Finally she said,sounding very irritated " i cant do this now ,you will get a letter. but if you cancel again you will be referred back to your GP" I said that I hadnt cancelled ,they had. More huffing ,puffing and mumbling. Even the actual appointment letter is quite negative. You have a 15 minute slot to arrive and book in ,electronically. No earlier,you will not be allowed in . If you are late ,you will not be seen. Its an eye hospital. I ,an many other patients struggle with travel ,electronic booking in and finding our way around. Im dreading it.
Im sure they get rude patients and missed appointments but some staff seem to hate their jobs . I was polite and friendly .

Oh do I feel for you! You have no idea.
DD had major orthodontics issues (surgery, all the braces for 5 years) so it was dealt by the hospital (the head of the department as well!) they were absolutely amazing and lovely, made us feel welcomed and answered all our questions.
Now DS.....first appointment we explained we can't do private, as soon as I told them the whole feel of the room changed, fine, I don't care, I pay taxes, he needs braces and until the NHS changes, he will gets it, I just can't afford private.
I had the stupidity to explain that my son has ADHD and chew almost everything, oh sweet lord what did I say😱, the orthodontist all raging telling me that, they might as well not put the brace, not worth it. My son had to absolutely promise not to put anything in his mouth (and he got so scared by her, he never did anymore 😂).
We managed to get it done but to this day I have no clue what he is there for, what is the problem with his teeth? What are they fixing? When are they taking them off? No clue, getting answers is like....well.... pulling out teeth. The day we will stop going there can't come soon enough, was supposed to be a year, it is now almost 2 years.
But if you are paying privately then this kind of treatment is completely and absolutely unacceptable.

I had a very odd experience at the medical practice recently. Came in and went to the front desk and was ignored. I was the only one there so not busy. 3 people at the desk, nobody acknowledged me. I had to garner their attention by saying hello etc. Still ignored. Was wondering by this point if I was invisible. Eventually someone decided to talk to me and told me to wait. This same person was the one I had the appointment with!? She didn't even acknowledge i was her patient (by a hi just be with you for example of good manners) but made me wait for a further 10 mins when there was no other appointments. So odd and so rude.