Obese children

[Scarfitwere]

I notice so many obese (primary age) children around these days, it was very apparent at my childrens' sports day and these poor kids could barely do the races. One sat on the side as they were too large to participate at all. I understand overweight adults and it's hard to lose weight etc, but these are young children, their parents control their food intake. Why are so many parents letting their kids get like this? Its setting them up for bullying, not being able to join in sports etc, and health problems. I just don't get it AIBU?

YANBU, it's disturbing and distressing. We went to sports day last week and there were a significant number of children too fat to even properly run. It was heartbreaking watching these young kids, primary age, wobbling across the grass sweating and red faced and finishing way behind their healthier peers. It really hit home to me what parents are doing by making their children obese. They are harming them in so many ways and setting them up for a lifetime of difficulties. It is a real safeguarding concern and I fear things will only get worse.

tbf though when you're that skint (been there), you're also not overeating the food you do have. There's around 400 cals in a pot noodle. You're not going to be eating six of them in a day (putting you above most people's TDEE), you're rationing them to ensure that you don't run out of food and stuff yourself today, go hungry tomorrow.

I don't think people realise what it's like when you genuinely are out of money with no access to a food bank. You're not overeating. You're conserving your food because once that's gone there isn't any more. You'd have to eat thirty hobnobs in a day to go over your TDEE. People who have been in true abject poverty don't have the luxury of eating mindlessly like that.

The fact remains, to become obese you have to eat excessive calories of food, over a prolonged period of time. When you're skint you can't do that. It's bizarre how people don't grasp that.

As a parent of 2 children who have been overweight, about which I was 100% judged, I feel I can say with some confidence that it's a very complicted issue.

My children's weight issues were for different reasons. DS has ADHD and SPD. He was very overweight and it was very concerning for us. His weight was the result of a combination of simply eating too much and not enough exercise. He was a good eater, and we ate healthily, but the volume of food he needs meant that we were inadvertently giving him way too many calories - and he was ALWAYS asking for more food (thanks ND).

This was exacerbated by the fact that he wasn't moving as much as he should - he did extra curricular etc, but it's that constant, low level movement that's important. we put the effort in - encouraged a lot more independence so he was out and about more, found new sports groups with a focus on longer sessions and fitness, and shifted a lot of what he ate so that he could still have large portions, but they were lower calorie. Luckily, he's a brilliant eater so he doesn't care fi his plate is full of salad or full of mashed potato - he'll eat it! He's now a very tall, very sporty, very slim 14 year old who just won full colours for sport at school.

DD was notably overweight, albeit nowhere near as bad as DS. She has food intolerances, only some of which we've got on top of, and some other minor health conditions. This combination has also led to her being an annoyingly fussy eater. Her doctors have consistently assured me that she's fine, but I have worried a lot.

But again, like DS, we've encouraged a lot more movement - she attends dance classes, we get out and about a lot etc. Slowly I'm trying to introduce a more balanced diet. She's also much less bloated and prone to "holding weight" which I see defintiely happens when she IS bloated. And she's growing. She's not where I want her to be, but she's well on track.

The point is that it's complicated. And the judgement doesn't help.

Oh, and the 23% of children are overweight or obese figure? I have serious doubts about that. After DS lost all that weight AND had another growth spurt - to the point me and teachers were keeping a very close eye on him for an ED as he was starting to look TOO thin, I received the dreaded letter telling me he was obese. I couldn't believe it.

So I went digging... the NHS admits themselves that BMI figures for children who are tall or short are not necessarily helpful. Pity they didn't figure that out when they sent me the letter. If you put his weight and height at age 10 into the BMI calculator but said he was 12.... it said he was 50th percentile, and perfect. That's because as well as being on the 97th percentile for weight, he was on the same percentile for height.

The fact remains, to become obese you have to eat excessive calories of food, over a prolonged period of time. When you're skint you can't do that

Of course you can. Yesterday I bought a 100 gram bar of chocolate...it cost 55p. It has over 500 calories in it. A bag of doughnuts can cost £1. People in poverty in developed countries will still generally have access to money...they need to buy food. Processed, sugary food gives you the most calories for the lowest price.

Exactly.

and if you have to, you might start rationing what you are eating but your child? You are going to give them what you can, including the cheap snacks in an attempt to keep them full.

The thing is that in the past (let’s say 70s) there was no fast food . Well, there was fish and chips, but there were no ready meals (save for Vesta curries when I was small but these were very exotic!) and a Chinese takeaway was a rare dipping of a toe into foreign food. Meals had to be made and fridges contained the ingredients, not random snacking items.

There was absolutely no notion of eating a family pack of crisps yourself, there were no giant packs of sandwiches/meal deals in supermarkets… in fact snacking at all just didn’t really happen.

You might eat sweets/chocolate, or an ice cream out, but there was always the mantra “You’ll spoil your tea!!”

Now, to be hungry is seen as terrible. I’ve had kids to tea who look at you belligerently and say “I’m hungry” and can’t believe that if tea is in half an hour you wait till then. The dcs now they’re older say their friends will just order food for delivery if they happen to feel peckish. If one of mine ordered a pizza before dinner I’d go barmy.

Like I said I'm talking about young kids, under 8. And this thread is about obese children not just overweight ones. It's actually very hard for a young child to get obese barring certain medical conditions.
Someone I know has two morbidly obese toddlers she is twice my age and has twice my income so being ignorant or poor has nothing to do with it, she gives them a constant stream of cookies and sweets. I'm convinced she has Munchausens at this point.

No one's getting fat eating a pot noodle for dinner and someone in a comment below yours mentioned budget teabags. Since when have cheap teabags had more calories than expensive teabags?

Very true, when I was actually in poverty I was slim, I couldn't afford to buy excess amounts of food. My kids had plenty but did not snack like they do now. I could afford to buy cheap biscuits but they weren't allowed to just freely eat them whenever because if they were gone in 2 days then there was none for the rest of the week. So therefore the kids were all a healthy weight too but they never went hungry.

That's absolute nonsense.

A bag of 5 donuts costs £1.

Tesco has a bar of milk chocolate with 534 calories for 55p. They have a pack of chocolate chip cookies - pack calories 1400, pack price 65p.

Go into any discount shop - you can literally buy a whole meal's worth of calories for under £1.

And the evidence is absolutely clear from social research - the poorest people in the UK are the fattest.

There's always going to be outliers either way but it still doesn't change the fact that childhood obesity is linked with poverty.

@Dramatic

Except we know that people on the very lowest incomes in the UK have the highest rates of obesity.

Are you going to argue that those people who are in the lowest income decile aren't actually experiencing poverty?

Yes it is, but it is not the most important factor as it is still very high among those living in more affluent areas (21% of children living in the top economic tertile are overweight or obese - source).

"No one's getting fat eating a pot noodle for dinner"

If you ate a pot noodle for dinner the likelihood is you'd be starving by 10pm. At which point you might stick some oven chips in (£2.65 a kilo) and have them with a big dollop of own brand mayonnaise. Bingo 600 calories - an extra meal. To go with the 450 calories in the pot noodle.

You can be as superior as you like, but the fact remains, it's very very easy for people on low incomes to take in too many calories, and the evidence for this is all around us.

Fast food culture, UPF’s, availability of junk food, snacking culture, culture change to working mums and convenience food rather than stay at home mums having the time to cook from scratch.

Our diet now is vastly different to what people in the 70s were eating.

I include myself in the above. I’m a working mum and I don’t cook from scratch ad much as I would like. Every day is a hustle and I rely on processed stuff more than I should.

I try and get my kids to eat healthily but it’s very hard. Sugar is everywhere and they are desperate for it. If I withhold the sugary stuff they want (cereal etc, even the “boring stuff”, not necessarily things like Coco Pops etc) they just won’t eat. They will hold out for what they want.

My kids aren’t overweight, they are very slim, but I don’t give myself a pat on the back about that or berate those who have fat kids. It’s just luck that my kids aren’t fat to be honest, and I don’t know how long that luck will hold out. Therefore I am trying hard to improve their diets and teach them about food, but it’s not easy.

Ok. Noted. If the answer is ‘google’ then 90% of threads on here don’t have to exist.

Whenever I've been past our village school most of the children are being dropped off outside the school, so not surprising that most of them are overweight

I could have written this also.

I’m a single mum working pretty much full time. In the past women weren’t expected to work at all and would be supported either by the state or their husbands.

My kids are actually underweight but it’s mostly due to genetics and the fact they are very active (by their choice - they are always running around).

Do you not educate yourself before discussing things to avoid looking like an absolute arse?
Or just lean into it...

I'm not being superior lol like I said had my first child at 15 and had to leave home so was far from rich. I've eaten pot noodles for dinner loads of times and not been starving at 10pm? Maybe I'm just really lazy but I could not be doing with cooking at 10pm or washing up a mayo smeared plate 😂 sad to admit but that is my bedtime.

Like I said though this is a thread about children not adults and obese children not just overweight ones. It's very hard to make a young child obese everyone I know with an obese young child is giving them way too many sweeties and chocolates as a constant stream of snacks.

Someone mentioned budget teabags it's really reaching now no one's getting fat drinking tea. Since when have cheap teabags had extra calories compared to expensive teabags??

Children in the bottom income tertile are twice as likely to be obese as the top one. Id say that's pretty significant.

I've got to be honest I don't see how it can be true poverty if they're obese. Low income yes, poverty no.

My kids are driven to school because I have to go to work straight from there. The vast majority of other parents driving to school are doing the same.

Yes it means children aren’t walking to school anymore but it’s not (in a lot of cases) because the parents are too fat and lazy, it’s because they are going to work afterwards.

I cannot exercise due to disability.

My children are still slim and healthy because I can afford to pay for them to do lots of sports.
Not everyone has that option and at some schools very limited time is given to PE and there is very little playground space for exercise.

I would love to see more investment in free or subsidised sports options.

It's easy to judge people but not everyone lives easy lives.

“fast majority”?

I agree with pp who said that hunger is seen as an enemy. It's almost as though every slight discomfort has to be soothed these days, rather than suffering for a bit. I've seen people snacking their way towards dinner, I've been with a man who ate every four hours, because he might otherwise feel 'hungry'. Whilst extreme hunger isn't pleasant, simply having a rumbling stomach because it's been six hours since the last meal won't do anyone any harm.

But people are treating hunger as though the merest pangs of being a bit peckish must be overcome with 'snacks'. And, given that children will say 'I'm hungry' every time they are bored, they are being given food that they simply don't need. Back to three meals a day might cure a lot of obesity, cut out all the junky 'snacks' (which are simply eating between meals by another name), and learn (and teach children) that being hungry before dinner is a GOOD thing.