To feel anxious no one is going to turn up to dds party

[Dolliebobs]

DD8 is turning 9 soon. She’s having a party at the end of July but due to breaking up for school on Friday I gave the invites out last week.

she moved to this new school 3 weeks ago and has invited all the girls in her class (she’s having a cow girl theme).

iv only heard from one parent out of 15 she’s invited. She breaks up tomorrow so I have no way of contacting anyone to chase up etc.

Wwyd? :(

Is it a party at your house? Or a hall/venue, or an event where you pay per kid?

What about family kids, neighbourhood kids? Kids from her old school? Is there not a class WhatsApp or chat group you could remind the other parents?

At our house, iv hired a bell tent and having an old school party.

she moved schools due to bullying so iv invited a 2 friends she has from the old school.

im so upset for her :(

Have you joined the class WhatsApp? Easiest way to introduce yourself and ask if anyone’s gonna be around over the holiday as your girl is having a little party and would love to have some of her new classmates over

It's difficult and time consuming, but you have to plan a bit further ahead and get on the contacts chat.
I'm sorry your dd was bullied. I hope the party works out. Maybe prepare her that it was a bit late?

I’d chalk this one up to just being new, if no one shows just take her somewhere nice yourself? Maybe a day out in London at one of the art galleries. They are free but have stuff for all ages really and also can go somewhere nice afterwards like lunch.
then next year, just be really proactive with invites and maybe not do on last Friday before holiday.
could pick an activity based party location. Does your dad like NL Lazer tag for example, some of them are Wild West themed, or even darts?

I have the exact problem! Go early for drop off/pick up and get as many numbers as you can, and hopefully some parents will also have other parents numbers. You still have time! But also just have enough food, and don't stress too much as long as a few people come it will be fine! I hope your DD has a great time 😊 ETA: you have loads of time, also maybe print out reminder leaflets for the bags!

Cousins? Children of friends? Children of neighbours? It is a risk because she hasn’t had a chance to make friends with them yet, and the parents don’t know you, and it’s the holidays so people will be away.

I wouldn’t cross your fingers and hope. You need contingency plans.

Absolutely, be proactive. As you're not limited with numbers or venue over invite

This, also as contingency could consider going to Tate modern, or maybe portrait gallery, or even national gallery. Great day out and your dad will love it to take her mind off things if they don’t go as planned

No offence to any child but unless my child (when younger) was friends with a child we would reply no thank you life is busy enough to tuen up to random children's birthday parties

It is polite to reply yes or no but i wish parents would stop sending heaps of birthday invitations for children they have no connections with

I think there is a risk that by giving them out so close to the end of term, the invites will just fester in the bottom of school bags until the start of next term.

Do you have contact numbers for anyone at all? Could you ask the one parent who replied to pass the message onto others? Say you want to check they received invites etc. The last 2 parties my son attended were only because the mum had chased up - DS loses invites.

A stranger is just a friend you haven't met 🙃 Feel sorry for your kids tbh!

I dont see why, we invite friends to parties and friends invite us if some parents whole life revolves around endless kids parties good luck to them

I would try and get details of as many parents as I could before school finishes.

If you’re not in a class contact group then try and find out if there is one. Ask the parent who has responded for other parents details.

If you go to pick up tomorrow why not see if you can organise some play dates with any parents who are there? That’s a good way to get some contact details

But I wouldn’t contact the parents yet The party is still a long way away. As it’s over the holidays people may need to double check arrangements with family etc. Just get as many contact numbers as you can and then send a message in a couple of weeks with a reminder.

I actually think it’s a good sign no one has responded yet. I’ve always found that the definite nos response straight away and the yeses come in closer to the party

I hardly ever invited anyone to DDs' parties without having a parent's details to chase up. By the time DD2 was 9 or 10 we did it all on Whatsapp, there were no written invitations, that was about 2018 onwards. Get the parents details asap.

Could you tell your daughter that you left it a bit late and you will make sure it is all arranged once school gets back? I'm so sorry and can understand your worry. Well done on getting her away from the bullies.

She hasn't left it too late, she just needs to pull finger

Again, sorry you are stressed, totally understandable given you want your daughter to have a new start. Good luck.

The end of July is a hopeless time for school based parties. Most people will be away, or juggling childcare logistics.

I would seriously consider rescheduling until late September, by which point hopefully she will have made some stronger friendships, and making July a family only party.

I don't understand why you would leave it unknown?

Birthday party or any event, get people to confirm. All the Birthday parties that my son has been to, asked us, either in person, or on the phone, or on messaging apps/groups whether we were coming, and people said yes or no, and then the organizers knew well ahead of time roughly how many will come.

I can't imagine how stressful leaving it unknown would be.

Next time, link up with them all, phone, Whatsapp, email, or just ask them in person when you give out invites etc.

What a horrible thing to say. How is a child, who is new to the class, supposed to make friends if you have decided that she is a ‘random’ who has no connection to your kids, and therefore not worth spending time with. She is trying to make a connection!

Ask the teacher/other mums (the mum who replied?/pta, about the class WhatsApp / Facebook group.
What’s the general feel from your daughter? Are the kids talking about it at school? At 9 we’d moved to a couple of mates out for the day rather than whole class/all girls - appreciate you’re trying to include everyone as she’s so new. My point is, there are usually semi-established friendship groups so your daughter might be able to get a feel for which ‘groups’ have said they are coming. Obviously don’t put her on a mission - just a gentle ask.
If you don’t have enough outside school/cousins etc just take the 4 of them on a really good day out. Feel for you, it’s not easy navigating friendships 🌸

She has made friends, she has about 6 best friends and has been hanging out with most of the girls.

I went to sports day last week and saw how they all are, they were cheering her on and so lovely to her.

I have a mums number so will message her

Probably wants us to be in awe about how fabulously busy she is. We have a lot on but I prioritise parties because they are expensive and stressful for parents and it’s horrible waiting for responses.

Join the class WhatsApp group (I asked the class teacher first and she put me in contact with the class rep). My DC recently switched schools as well and while we had loads of friends from his old school, I also encouraged him to invite some new classmates.
It's custom at his previous school to create a WhatsApp group for the party, so I just added the new parents in there. (I contacted them separately before to check whether the invitation had made it home.)
We had one no show from his new school, the others all came.
Good luck. 😊