Unpleasant altercation - who was the most unreasonable?

[zerofeeling]

Took my dogs out today and was trying to park in a small space between two cars on a country lane. As I was inching back to fit into the space I heard a loud crunch 😖

The two men from the car behind had just set off on their walk, as I got out of my car one of them was heading back towards me shouting why did I try to park in such a small space. I said sorry and inspected the front of his car - couldn't see any damage at all, and apart from a tiny paint scuff nothing on my car. I said to him 'i can't see any damage, it doesn't look like I hit you'
Man just glanced over at his car then asked me for my details, I asked is that necessary and said again there's no damage. He said that's not the point you have to give your details if you've been in a collision. He was much taller than me and sort of fronting up to me repeating that he wanted my details and me refusing, saying I don't think it was a collision, I think I might have hit something underneath my car. (For info my Mum and a friend have both been scammed on their insurance by people who claimed all kinds of things after very minor prangs)

Then he took an ID wallet out of his pocket and flipped it open to show a photo and badge and said he's Police. I couldn't tell if it was genuine or not. He held his phone up and said he's filming me refusing to comply with the law.
By this time the other man had come back and also filming me and I started to worry - I'm in a secluded area, with two men who are much bigger than me. I told them I felt intimidated and are they trying to scam me?

I got in my car and tried to shut the door but 1st man held onto it to prevent me. I asked if he's trying to detain me and he said no but I will if you don't give me your details, I've identified myself to you as a police officer. I said you've got no right to detain me. Eventually he let go of the door and I had to turn the car round as the lane is a dead end. Once I turned round he said again that I'm breaking the law by refusing to give my details after a collision and he started to recite the Caution they give when you're arrested! I drove away very shaken up, no idea what consequences to expect.

So they put it behind her back tyre despite the fact she had driven in frontwards and then made a swift retreat when she realised her car wouldn't fit, in a matter of seconds. At which point did these people - who were already set off on their walk as she said - do a mad dash back to put something in the way of the back wheel? People who, again according to the OP, were far enough away to shout to get her attention?

Come on, get a grip!

So she was reversing and also looking out the front? Erm, what? Do you even drive?! You can't reverse and look out the front at the same time.

It was a joke! unclench!

BUT.. of course you can reverse and look out the front at the same time!.. you won't see where the fuck you're going (as OP found out) but there's nothing physical stopping you from looking straight ahead and pressing your foot down on the accelerator at the same time.

Yes I drive.. no I've never hit a parked car.

A very quick google will tell you that he’s right. You are required by law to exchange details with the other driver even if there is no damage.

He was (rightly) focused on the fact that you seemed to be trying to get away without doing so before getting distracted by inspecting the car for damage.

Damage isn’t always visible anyway. He’s within his rights to take your details, get his car checked over and then make a decision about whether to take it further.

Yes he behaved badly but you were 100 percent in the wrong for leaving.

YABU...and obtuse in your responses.

You should have given details.

Not clenched but it really wasn't clear that it was humorous/sarcastic! Maybe my fault as so many people on this thread are being deliberately dense!

Of course you can be a rotten driver and not look where on earth you are going, I think that's what happened today!

Me either!

I’d do this too. There’s no way I’d have crawled under my car to check with those goons there, and I expect police aren’t authorised to go around intimidating women in remote places when off duty. You should have taken photos , and your rego will suffice for their insurance to contact you. If you do get a police response that puts you at fault I’d be furious, say I was a woman alone in a remote area with 2 random men aggressively intimidating and filming me, no of course I don’t trust their random ‘I’m actually police’ ID -they were aggressive, filming me, on a regular day out not uniformed and if it’s not a fake id they use to murder women with, then they are exactly the type of police the met police advice was if you’re a woman broken down on the highway, don’t get into a police car with a solo policeman on the highway, wait for a bus, it’s safer than a random policeman!! Must be nice to feel so safe and smug that you’ve forgotten all the horrendous police assaults!

This isn’t a planned scam though, it’s just one incident where someone has taken advantage.

I read this exact same post a few months ago!! What's going on OP?

Thank goodness that's all he pulled out.

This. You have to exchange details. You know you hit the car, whether or not you could see any damage. YABU.

That's very interesting, because it certainly wasn't me.

Sorry to not be clear, if i was that unsettled I would have reported asap not ummed and aahed over whether to report it or not.

She doesn't think that she hit the car, so not a lie. There's loads of scams re car accidents. Then there's the issue of the the intimidating behaviour from someone claiming to be a serving officer.

@zerofeeling Have you also contacted your insurer? Because if not you are putting yourself in the wrong here...

I do genuinely believe that if you didn't feel the impact you probably drove over something, but you should be reporting it in case the man involved decides to. The result may be that there was no damage but that you left the scene without giving details. Save yourself from that.

The whole claiming to be a policeman is definitely dodgy. A real policeman would understand perfectly well that a woman in the OP's position could feel intimidated and would know how to behave to reassure her rather than inflaming the situation further by refusing to let her close her door. Furthermore, said policeman would be well aware that while she should give her details, he actually doesn't need them. He can report the accident with her car registration, which he clearly had on his video. Had he behaved correctly, his video would also show the whole interaction and so he's in no danger of being left with a damaged car that's not covered by insurance, so why keep pressuring a woman who's clearly scared and uncomfortable? There wouldn't be any need. He could point out calmly and clearly that he would be reporting the incident and her registration details to his own insurance company and the police and that someone would be in touch. He wouldn't need to worry about her 'getting away'. The fact that he didn't do this detracts from his credibility as a 'police officer'.

No idea where you got that from, at no point did I say I'd hit his car.

Well he and his mate filmed the interaction and I'd be surprised if a cop didn't have a dash camera aswell so if that loud crunching sound she heard was her hitting his car she's fucked if she lies to the police about any of it.
Also her claims of it being a scam just don't hold water nor does her claim that she just reversed over some unseen object that had vanished by the time she got out of the car.
I just don't believe that she's being honest about the behaviour of the men when they were both filming the interaction nor her claim that she didn't hit the other car

Edited for typos

Well if that's the case and she's bullshitting about the whole let then the man has nothing to worry about, he has both hers and his own behaviour on video and will presumably be reporting it to both the police and his insurance company and the OP will find herself in a sticky and unpleasant situation.

Where is the laugh emoji when you really, really need it?

There's still a laugh emoji. Lots of them. 😀😁😂😃😄😅😆They only got rid of the secret laugh emoji. If you want to laugh secretly you are out of luck.

Good grief. Thank you.

You do realise OP you could have caused damage to the other car, beneath the visual area? And until that is properly checked they don’t know. And car repairs are costly. So why should he potentially be out of pocket just because your perception of space is crap and you can’t park a car?

Give over with the “2 big blokes and I’m a small woman”. You crashed into someone’s car. And they cost a lot of money.

She knows. She’s just hoping to get away with it.

YABU hopefully he has your reg and can report it to his insurance company to follow up. You hit his car you need to provide your details. You should have took photos/video of the lack of damage and that should have been that. You escalated this whole situation by refusing to provide your details after being involved in an accident.

Speak to the police, tell them what happened where and when. They may ask you to bring your licence and insurance into a station. Then you're sorted.

Not sure if you've had a good look at your car, but you need to and get loads of pictures. Make it a priority before you go out again.

Good luck.