Lodger freakout deposit IDKif i can do this anymore

[ForOliveTiger]

Lodger is insisting on deducting her deposit from this months rent before leaving the house. It's now incredibly awkward and I have to live with her for another 3-4 weeks.

We have been going round in circles for hours. She has run up a £1,000 British Gas bill by having 1 hour shower every night. I feel like she's trying to bully and intimidate me and I really don't feel comfortable with her in my home anymore. The fact she is so insistent makes me think there IS damage she doesn't want me to know about.

I have unreservedly reassured her I will refund her deposit but she won't have it.

If the notice period is up change the locks when shes out - finance it usung her deposit . Pack all her things and store for earliest collection.

is that a proportional reaction to that convo? did you see the transcript of it, idk if im overreacting

Yep, there's definitely more to that. It's quite possible your suppliers have got it wrong.

dont back down
get her out asap followed by email. No need to feel sorry, she’s brought this on herself.
do you legally have to refund her deposit give she has gone way past any fair use policy of water & electric ?

im going to be referring the complaint to ofgem. they have been useless in their investigation so far

Is your lodger refusing to leave after notice period

no i dont

there is no notice period for lodgers

It is proportional in my opinion
she is affecting your MH & finances

Two issues / not possible that her showers have cost £1000. You're exaggerating or missing something else that has run up the cost.
second issue, if she doesn't pay the last month's rent then she moves out, immediately. You don't give her a month to leave if she hasn't paid. The deposit isn't the last month's rent, so if she doesn't pay on time, you give her 48 hours to pay or vacate. Simple as that.

ahhh guys idk what to do this is such an awkward and uncomfortable situation for me. idk why she thought living in complete discomfort wa worth £400 to her: to me its not!

you make it sound so easy. i really dont want her around

also her comment about 'im a mother wanting to leave in peace' felt like a bit of a low blow considering she knows about my traumatic stillbirth and has heard me sobbing over it every week for the last year

Change locks as soon as she’s out. Call police if she causes trouble . Put her stuff in storage. No refund .

She’s being unreasonable but I’m not sure there’s much you can do about it except make her leave now. As you’ve said, there’s no protection scheme for the deposit and she has no tenancy agreement protecting her. You must make her leave now she’s told you she won’t be paying full rent.

Yes there bloody is you give it!!!

Honestly you should have dome more research into this. Never do this again.

Shes emotiokwlly blackmailing you, heres what you do.

1. Stop engaging, youve said all you have to say, do NOT change your view point

1. Give her notice. Now. I suggest a week.

1. Put yhat notice in writing.

1. If she doesnt leave, you chajge the locks.

1. You do not capitulate on this deposit business

Were bills included in her rent?

What makes you think long showers have cost an additional £1,000? Do you have any actual consumption data i.e. meter readings etc, or have you just decided your bill is too high and complained to your supplier on that basis?

no but she didnt pay the excess when i asked her and showed her the enormous bill, so i just shrugged my shoulders and paid it myself :(

this post is glowing of British Gas lol

I thought no one was ever going to ask.

It makes no sense at all.

It’s up to you if you want to take the risk and ignore advice.

What does that even mean?

I read the text conversation and to me it reads differently. To me it reads that she is afraid she will leave and you will just never give her money back, and she will have no recourse.
You are very insistent that you will send her the money later, that would make me nervous!

Why are you insisting on doing a bank transfer for after she leaves?

She is a lodger, she only has one room to be checked....just do a check when she has emptied the room but before she leaves. Either cash that she signs for, or an instant transfer in front of her.

I never made my lodgers leave and wait at my leisure wondering if they would get their deposit returned.

basically she refused to pay the bill she agreed to share as bill were not included so i got manipulated and just said it must be an issue with the supplier. i was tryna be nice