To ask about your experience with male nursery staff

[GloMum]

My daughter will be starting pre-reception and her key worker at the nursery is male. As a whole, the class will be overseen by this teacher plus two more female members of staff. Does anyone have experience with male nursery staff, especially in regards to caring for girls.

Hi GloMum,

Totally understand where you're coming from. I had the same initial wobble when my daughter’s key person turned out to be a young male practitioner. It just wasn’t what I’d expected, probably because you so rarely see men in early years settings. But I can honestly say it turned out to be a really positive experience.

He was kind, gentle, incredibly patient, and had a lovely way of engaging all the children, including the girls. My daughter absolutely adored him. She used to come home chatting about what they’d done together and was always excited to see him in the mornings. He made her feel safe and seen, and he worked really well alongside the female staff too.

I think it’s important to challenge the assumption that only women are naturally suited to this kind of care. Good practitioners are good practitioners, regardless of gender. In fact, I quite liked that my daughter had a caring male role model at such a young age. I think that kind of balance is healthy.

Of course, trust your gut and speak to the setting if you’ve got concerns, but in my experience, it was a great thing.

x

The male nursery worker both my children had was amazing. They adored him. They still mention him every now and again, and they left nursery a few years ago.

What age? My little girl has a male key worker at pre school, with all the teachers and other key workers female. She was 3 when she started, well out of nappies and didn’t need help toileting.

He seems great, at sports day he was helping the less confident kids, holding their hands and running with them.

If she’d had a male nursery keyworker when she started nursery at 1 and doing nappy changes I don’t think I would have been so comfortable with it.

Lucky girl - the more men who work in nurseries and other caring professions the better

Wonderful marvellous fantastic - a man working in a nursery is unusual so can be someone quite incredible. Could be the first time a child encounters a good man.
School nurseries have enough staff around to make sure any safeguarding procedures have been sorted.

If she’d had a male nursery keyworker when she started nursery at 1 and doing nappy changes I don’t think I would have been so comfortable with it.

Same here, even though i know I shouldn’t feel that way it makes me uncomfortable 😬

My kids attended a family owned nursery. The mum and daughter were the qualified staff and the dad and son both worked there.

The guys were lovely and great with the kids. Part of what made that nursery so extraordinary.

So few men go into EY care that most of them will have made a really positive decision to do it unlike lots of young women who just drift into it.

My DD’s key worker was male at nursery. He was absolutely amazing, she adored him. It was invaluable for her, as it was her first real experience of having a supportive, kind, stable and caring male role model - I feel that he made a huge positive difference in her life (and I made sure to tell him that, when she left to start school).

Yes. We've had three male nursery staff: my son's key worker when DS was 2.5, the assistant manager, and most recently, the one who covers for other's AL, currently working in DD's room.They've all been fantastic with kids, and I think the key worker in particular was a calming influence on the boys rowdy tendencies. I think it's good for all the children to have positive male and female role models.

It was great! 2 males in DS nursery. They had loads of banter with DS and brought him out of his shell. He’s always up for a laugh now. DD is older and as we moved she didn’t go to this nursery and only had a female setting which was more nurturing & calm setting.

"So few men go into EY care that most of them will have made a really positive decision to do it unlike lots of young women who just drift into it."

Agree with this. I see it in nursing too. My daughter had a male nursery worker when she was aged 3-5. He was great, full of energy and enthusiasm and the kids all loved him.

Stop suppressing your instincts. Having men teach in primary schools is one thing, but working with v young children in a nursery where some children will be non verbal or still in nappies is another.

I wouldn’t put my DC in a nursery where men worked.

As for the glib assertions that safeguarding stuff is sorted, did you miss the stories of abuse and manslaughter that have gone on in UK nurseries in recent years?

The stories from the UK that I have see all involved female staff...

I really value my daughter having both male and female role models at nursery.

Women working in nurseries and harming children is also a thing.

The child is nearly 4, she is verbal and toilet trained. I’m happy to read so many of you have positive experiences.

Hmm.

https://www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2025/jun/16/woman-22-convicted-of-abusing-21-babies-at-nursery-where-she-worked

Why would the gender of the staff make any difference?

Christ, no wonder there are no men in teaching anymore.

This place is toxic sometimes.

Wow!

Just wow!

What an utterly toxic point of view.

When you told the father of your child that he was not allowed to.change nappies how did he react?

Stupid reasoning. So a man can’t control himself if he sees a vagina. What about a female worker cha gong a male child? Is that ok?

Not in a nursery setting but I’ve worked with male carers and nurses for years.

All working with vulnerable, non-verbal children and I can honestly say I’d recommend all of them. They bring a different dynamic and way of working with children in such a positive way.

As for the male/female thing - I’ve worked with many concerning professionals over the years all have been women. A concerning person is just that it doesn’t align with sex.

Did you misread the OP? It’s a pre reception class so presumably that is in a primary school and baring SEN needs the children will be perfectly verbal and capable of toileting independently. And horrible as it is to think about it’s not like female staff haven’t abused young children.

My DD had a male teacher for her school nursery class when her usual teacher went off sick. He was newly qualified and came to cover from the sports department and he was fantastic.

Those people who have an issue with this -do their fathers or grandfather's never get involved with any aspect of their care?

Really good experience.

All those cases in the news involve women - have never seen any problems with male members of staff.

Who do you propose staff the nurseries? Mythical creatures?

“Stop suppressing your instincts” sounds an awful lot like allowing unwarranted biases to me.