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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be absolutely livid

67 replies

johnso · 24/05/2008 22:03

Ds's 8th b'day tomorrow
We are having a party
The house is a mess
I had to take the boys to a party today and Dh wanted to come but I asked him to stay at home and tidy up
I get home, it's a bloody mess!!
He says he fell asleep- how irresponsible(he has been on nights but wanted to stay up today to get in sync with us for the bank holiday weekend)
He is doing it now after I had a go at him.
Men, eh?

OP posts:
findtheriver · 24/05/2008 22:04

You asked your DH to tidy the house before the party????

Alambil · 24/05/2008 22:05

Can't you tidy up together seeing as he's probably knackered from being on nights and shut his eyes for 5mins in the peace - which meant he fell asleep?

Is it really worth being livid about?

mrsleroyjethrogibbs · 24/05/2008 22:08

i dont think this is serious is it?

windygalestoday · 24/05/2008 22:11

My dh works nights too and i dont think hed stay awake in order to clean - dont be livid have a quick tidy round and an early night enjoy tomorrow

Original poster
johnso · 24/05/2008 22:12

He usually does things as soon as I snap my fingers-that is why I am livid

OP posts:
WallOfSilence · 24/05/2008 22:15

My dh has been on nights too. It's a horrible feeling when you want to do something but are just too knackered. I say leave the man alone!!

I think if you had to stay uo all night you just might fall asleep too!

And I think you sound a bit like a bully 'He usually does things as soon as I snap my fingers.' It's not a husband you need, it's a bloody dog.

mrsleroyjethrogibbs · 24/05/2008 22:16

well goodness you are lucky then.
marriage is about give and take,so dont be mad at him

Triathlete · 24/05/2008 22:18

You're angry because he fell asleep after a night shift??!?

You're a harpy. Leave him alone. Night shifts will already take ten years off his life without you nagging him as well.

mrsleroyjethrogibbs · 24/05/2008 22:19

i feel a popcorn thread coming on

Yurtgirl · 24/05/2008 22:19

So you got to go to a party - and you wanted him to stay at home and tidy up, lucky him! Im not surprised he fell asleep..........

Original poster
johnso · 24/05/2008 22:19

Give and take sounds like chaos to me, dear
harpy? don't make me laugh. Evertone has to nag a bit

OP posts:
Divastrop · 24/05/2008 22:20
Hmm
GrimmaTheNome · 24/05/2008 22:20

You have a DH who is theoretically capable of tidying the house? Count your blessings... some of us have DHs who only ever contribute to the mess. And fall asleep in the daytime even though they don't work nights.

WallOfSilence · 24/05/2008 22:21

Well, if my dh told me I couldn't go to a party but to stay at home & clean... I'd change my name to cinderella.

Perhaps for his birthday you could buy him a brush & a can of polish?

littlelapin · 24/05/2008 22:22

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mrsleroyjethrogibbs · 24/05/2008 22:23

well said lapin.
johnso - YABBU

littlelapin · 24/05/2008 22:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WallOfSilence · 24/05/2008 22:24

Oh, I didn't realise it was an AIBU thread.. in that case, YES you are being unreasonable.

My dh is on night shift now, I will see him at 7am & he will be getting into my warm bed for a cuddle.... for him to continue sleeping whilst I get up with the kids.

He's a man not a robot.

onepieceoflollipop · 24/05/2008 22:25

" he usually does things as soon as I snap my fingers"

If your dh had posted a similar sentence you would have had even more outraged responses.

Have you ever worked nights? I have - it is awful (understatement). If you don't sleep in the day when you need to (even when you desperately want to get on track for your nights off) it can make you feel really ill.

Original poster
johnso · 24/05/2008 22:25

Sorry was away from my computer (he's mopping)
Ilike things done when I like em done-it's just the way I am. He is aware of this after 15 yrs marriage, that is whay I am shocked by this disobedience

OP posts:
findtheriver · 24/05/2008 22:28

Oh I see, a wind up

onepieceoflollipop · 24/05/2008 22:28

My dh incidentally is lovely when I have worked a night/been called out all night. Just like WallofSilence is for her dh. I sleep as long as I want even when he has worked all week himself and had the dcs all week end while I work. We are a team see, we give and take.

Sometimes he gets it wrong, and sometimes I do, that's what marriage/a relationship is about.

Why not show some respect and love for your dh. I hope you are able to be nice to him in rl even if you can't be nice on here. Your posts have made me

littlelapin · 24/05/2008 22:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

micci25 · 24/05/2008 22:28

are mad woman! my dp would have heart attack if i asked him to clean after a day shift let alone a night shift! (not that i would expect him too after a night shift!)

you should be happy that you have a dh who is willing to help!

UniversallyChallenged · 24/05/2008 22:29

HE NORMALLY SLEEPS AFTER A NIGHT SHIFT??

What is the matter with you woman - get him ironing, sureley that doesnt take much energy does it AND he can watch PhilnFern at the same time. And if he's good, really good, throw him a bone when he's finished!

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