To charity shop her parcel?

[Imaginedinos]

So a friend asked if she could have a parcel delivered to me as she needed it the next day and she had work, it’s medium size. This was back in March. Parcel came, I text her to let her know I have it and it’s been sat in my hallway ever since! She’s basically ghosted me since March, I know I haven’t done anything wrong because the 2 times she has replied she’s been normal and nice. But it’s pissing me off, it’s taking up room I don’t particularly have in my small house and she seems to have no intention of coming to collect it! Am I being a dick if I get rid of it?! Or any advice on what to do. I’m worried that if I do get rid of it she will text and say I’m coming to get my parcel but it’s been 3 months…

Surely her address is on the packaging? Or for some reason she asked of she could buy something and have it delivered to you, 15 min drive away and you don’t even know her address?

Write not known at this address and post it back.

People pleasers are annoying - just deal with stuff and move on.

Oh wow, so you're not really that close friends?

Super cheeky IMO. I wouldn't even be willing to drop it off at this point, unless I was already driving past her house for some other reason.

To be fair, it's unlikely that she's maliciously using you for free storage; it's just something low down on her list of priorities. Just tell her you're having a clear out and if she wants it she'll need to collect it by whatever date, or it's getting binned.

Either that, or open it and if it's something nice, keep it and claim you've no idea what happened to the package you took in months ago if she ever brings it up 👀🥳

You can't bin it, but you can say that it's in the way and give her a deadline for her to collect it otherwise you'll dispose of it if she doesn't want it.

By 'dispose' you have a duty of care so if its valuable you'll need to perhaps sell it then give her the money less an admin fee.

What's in the parcel?????

Feck that!

No way should you be taking it to her.

Just message her and tell her you've held the parcel for 3 months and reminded her several times to collect it but as she hasn't and it's in the way you're going to assume she doesn't want it and bin it if she doesn't come to collect it before next Saturday.

A week is more than enough notice to sort it, OP.

She's taking the pure piss out of you.

Enough is enough.

What’s the value of the package? Do you know what’s in it? Can you shove it in the attic / garage / shed?

I wouldn’t be dropping it off - the friend needs to get it!

‘Your parcel is still here weeks later, cluttering up my house. If you haven’t collected it by X o’clock on X date, sorry, but it’ll be going to the charity shop.’

No, you would no be being a dick if you did this. She is the dick for claiming she needed it the next day to pressure you into accepting it, and then just leaving it!

So yes - text her 'Remember that parcel you needed next day, back in March? Well it's still in my hall and it needs to be gone by tomorrow. Either you come and get it, or it goes in the bin. See you tomorrow! [thumbsup-emoji]!'

If you must be a people pleaser, the person you need to start pleasing is YOU.

If she only lives a 15 min drive away and having told you that she needed the parcel the next day, I would have given her one week's notice back in March.

Just text her and tell her that if she doesn't collect the parcel within a week you will dispose of it - and don't agree to have any parcels delivered to your address in the future.

March?! Why would anyone keep it for so long. It would have been gone after a fortnight in my house. What is it? Anything worth selling?

As others say, try and actually speak to her if you can. The if not text saying
' Remember that parcel from way back? Do you still want it? If not I'm going to have to dispose of it if you don't collect it by X date.'

I would take it she's totally forgotten rather than she's deliberately antagonising you. But it is weird to blank you regardless of the package.

Give til that date then do just chuck it or charity shop.

As you took responsibility for accepting her parcel, you can't just throw it away. She could sue you legally. I would ask her for her address and go drop it off.

Thanks everyone, I’ve texted her fingers crossed

What is in it ?

As a lecturer we use the shit sandwich approach. Something positive, then a negative finished with a positive.

Why have you left it for 3 months without asking her to collect it ?

And when you say you don't know the number of her house , her whole address will be on the parcel !

I'm sorry I Hooe you can come to terms with it

Edited to add, just text your friend and say as she appears to have ghosted you it'll be donated to a charity shop unless she comes and gets it within a week! How odd of her!

‘Return to sender, not known at this address’.

The Op’s address will be on the parcel not the friends.

I would pop it back to the post office as undelivered mail if I could be bothered. The return address will be on the label. Or I’d drop it off outside her house.

at the end of the day there could be a genuine reason why she’s been quiet, rather than just laziness.

When you next have occasion to see her, take it with you unless it is too big. Definitely stress that you want rid. It couldn't have been anything important.

@Livpool the whole issue is that the friend has not picked it up in three months and may likely not pick it up even when nudged. Given there could be issues if the OP disposed of a parcel (as someone has outlined), it could be far easier to just drop it off if it wasn’t too inconvenient to do so. Although it doesn’t sound like it would be that convenient due to it being 15 mins away and not being sure which house the friend lives in.

Presumably it's your name on the label rather than hers and yours as the recipient?

I think you're both as bad as each other.

She's a friend but you don't know exactly where she lives.

She's not been in touch for a couple of months?

Okay- text her and give her 48 hours to collect it. Tell her you will give it to charity shop- depending what it is.

Do you know what it is?

Simple.

I’d have opened it by now and then either kept it myself or charity shopped it. My house isn’t a free storage facility!