To miss the first lockdown?

[TidyOchreReader]

I know it was a tough time for many but I genuinely loved that first lockdown. I think about it all the time. There was something strangely blissful about slowing down, having fewer obligations and just focusing on connecting with people - even though we couldn’t physically see them. And when you did see someone, the gratitude was immense. AIBU to feel nostalgic for that time?

I had to leave my 14 yo on her own all day every day to go to work and because I was working outside of the home couldn't see my elderly father for a year because he was shielding due to ill health. For some people I'm sure it was months of sun and fun but you won't get much enthusiasm from those of us who bust a gut in every way while you sat in a paddling pool.

I loved it.

I’m an introvert so it was absolutely my time to shine. I got in amazing shape, read loads, WFH, took long walks.

I presume you were furloughed? It was incredibly stressful trying to manage working full time and 5 year old who was not at school.

It doesn't mean it was a shit show for everybody. I also enjoyed my way of life at the time. I appreciate not everybody was so lucky.

I was very lucky and had a peaceful, lovely time I look back on with fondness (WFH, no pressure to go anywhere, just chilled in my house and garden with my pets, read books, etc). After an awful year the year before with health issues, a cheating husband etc, it allowed me some decompression time in a unique way I was not expecting. It’s not something I mention much as I am aware many people did not share that experience.

I enjoyed the social aspects, because social butterfly I am not. I do have friends, but see them physically very periodically anyway and like people 2m away, thank you.

I’ve just kept that up by continuing to not go to the pub etc, but still wouldn’t want that time period back because of how I know it impacted others.

I know it was an incredibly difficult and even traumatic time for so many, especially parents. I definitely didn’t mean to downplay that. My post was more about my own experience - the slower pace, the focus on connection, and how it made me reflect on how overstimulating things can feel now. I completely get that it landed differently for others.

Absolutely not, YABU

We had to shield. DH worked from home throughout the whole thing. No furlough for us. However DH wasn't able to walk any further than our tiny garden for months. DD had her first steps and first birthday during the first lock down. I have a photo of the first time we went out as a family it was September 2020 to our local beach in the pouring rain. My walks with DD were also only when it rained as it meant we had playgrounds to ourselves (when they were open). Whilst being petrified that if DH got covid he'd die on a ward and I wouldn't get to say goodbye.

I'm sure it was pleasant for many people not having to do anything whilst the government paid for them to do so. However the reality for many of us with vulnerable family members was very different.

Edited to add: I also ended up with a home birth that went wrong because we didn't want DH to have to make a trip to hospital for the birth. I also had to have my cancer diagnosis on my own as we weren't allowed to have people for support.

No surprise you’d get people coming on and screaming at you for all the bad things that happened. Yes, they did happen. However, some of us, despite all that going on, got an experience of a different way of life that for various reasons resonated with us better than the status quo.

I never had to fret about after work socials or horrible commutes, and that’s valid.

Just because X number had a shit time doesn’t mean we all had to have a shit time.

Others of us, diagnosed or not, had a nicer experience than usual because we weren’t forced into society. Imagine telling someone with social anxiety or agoraphobia or some other condition that they’re unreasonable for enjoying a time out from the strains of normal life. Sheesh.

FWIW, I was not on furlough and worked 10-12 hours a day at my computer in a one bed flat. I didn’t sit in a paddling pool fucking around.

I understand that you enjoyed it OP but for so many people it was horrendous and thinking of it brings back so many bad memories. That's why you're getting the reactions you are.

Personally lockdown for me included DP getting his terminal cancer diagnosis on his own, not being able to see my DF when he was dying and having to deal with a grieving DD whilst having no human contact.

I get where you're coming from but it is going to stir up so many awful things for people.

YABVU.. I drove my Y13 18 year old son to drop his books off at school today. He's very socially introverted and awkward. I told him to go out with his friends today. He said to me, "You don't worry about me. I know lockdown wasn't very good for me. But I'm OK now"

He was 13 when it started.Had an awful impact on him mentally and he's only just getting better now. I dread to think how many other kids have been impacted.

YABU

people were dying
kids out of education
people working in hideous circumstances
people losing their jobs
exams, weddings etc cancelled
people not able to mourn the dead properly
the elderly abandoned in care homes
give your head a wobble

I understand your frustration with the way things were handled politically, there was a lot of anger and betrayal and I don’t dismiss that at all. My post wasn’t meant to glorify the policies or restrictions but just to reflect on the quieter, slower pace of life I personally experienced at the time. I know it wasn’t the same for everyone.

Delulu to the max.

I enjoyed some of it. I got a hot tub (yeah I know, hated on here) and really benefitted that chilling in there after work. I got fit, set myself some challenges and lost 24lbs in 1yr. But I missed a lot of things. I wasn’t a fan of 100% WFH, I missed my colleagues. Now I go to the office 5 days a week out of choice, as I need that human interaction. The only adult I saw for most of that first year was my local friend for dog walks (God rest her soul, she passed earlier this year after a sudden illness). I missed my family 5hrs drive away and was sad to not spend Christmas with my mum and adult son. My teens hated it, one ended up self harming. So no, i’d hate to go back to lock down days. Above all, I was terrified one of us would get covid and die.

I mean I get it. I'd love to do like a week of it again as I'm not a people person. But Yabu because it went on ages and I was slowly losing my sanity and considering dyeing my hair green just for something to do by the end of it

I got covid early on.Right at the beginning and it was pretty scary.But fortunate enough to have a lovely home and garden to recover in.But no.It seriously impacted on my DHs new business and made a serious dent in our savings.Plus it was very stressful for our DCs with small children stuck at home and one and ICU nurse.So no I absolutely don't miss it and hope we never have to isolate like that ever again.

That sounds incredibly stressful and I’m really sorry you were treated that way. I get that the experience was awful for many, especially people like you who kept everything running. My post was just about how I personally found something grounding in that slower, quieter pace, not a dismissal of the hardship others faced.

U must be looking back with rose tinted glasses. I worked in a hospital at the time then moved to community. It was an absolute nightmare

Yes we really enjoyed it too. It was glorious weather & spent the time outside horse riding & on the farm.
Work was relatively unchanged (supermarket & farming)
I'm quite introverted & self sufficient so actually it was a lovely time.
I found the winter lockdown later on in the year alot harder. The NHS seemed to stop functioning eg GPs which took its toll on a few older family members.

That doesn't take away from the dreadful time people who were immunocompromised, got sick, lost loved ones etc. They must remember it very differently.

I liked the peace and quiet of the towns and being able to really hear the birds.

Everything else was utterly, utterly, utterly shit. I was / am a Forgotten Freelancer whose industry shut down but received no financial assistance from anyone or any organisation.

I was single, home alone and terrified. I lost my life savings.

I had a baby born in April 2020, and it was the weirdest time I think I've ever had... First baby, so didn't have a clue anyway, but I didn't feel cut off from the world in the way I did with my second, because everyone else was stuck in too! I remember the sun, walking the quiet streets with baby in its pram, the empty city centre on our one daily outing. Personally, I enjoyed it 🤷‍♀️ though probably an element of rose tinted glasses

Some of us still had to work and take kids to school etc.

So wasn't really a slower pace of life.

And the stupid restrictions in place.

I wish I had a similar experience, unfortunately I was working in a customer facing role essential retail. I was spat on and sworn at with minimum ppe at the start. It was traumatic.

Ultimately, OP, you can’t be unreasonable for the way you feel. You feel what you feel. It’s valid. There’s no right or wrong. It’s neither reasonable nor unreasonable.