Cousin’s kids called nieces and nephews.

[ThatRubyMoose]

Over the last few years has anybody noticed this trend for calling your cousins’ kids nieces and nephews?

A further question can anybody tell me why I get irrationally angry about it?

There also seems to be a move away from calling your siblings’ partners aunt and uncle.

Do I live in a weird microcosm or have other people noticed this?

it really ticks me off.

No around here but if so I wouldn't spend much time on it.

May be uk is adopting norms from other cultures. In my culture we have nieces a d nephews galore from all sorts of cousins and quasi cousins and my uncle's aunt's granny's sister. May be people can't be bothered with children of my twice removed thrice removed cousins. May be it feels too impersonal

You live in a weird microcosm.

Only you know why you find something so unimportant so enraging.

No, I cannot explain why you get weirdly angry about it. Unless there is someone calling you aunt (or uncle) (or niece/nephew) and you don't want them doing this, I cannot see how it can possibly matter to you.

I am very close to my cousin's kids as we (my cousin and I) grew up very close (my mother died when I was still in my teens and my aunt (cousin's mother) really stepped in to try to fill the void). I refer to her kids as my nephews/nieces. I know that they aren't, but life's too short to refer to kids I see regularly as my first-cousins-once-removed.

We used to call my grandmothers next door neighbour “auntie” and she referred to us as nieces. It’s nothing new and I think it’s actually very nice.

I’m an ‘aunty’ to my cousins kids (well I was, now they’re older I’m just AbzMoz). For a lot of our friends, DH and I go by Aunty and Uncle AbzMoz too.

We don’t introduce ourselves like that but presumably their parents have - I think to denote closer friends and/or grown ups to be listened to (we go on holidays etc together where grown-up roles are interchangable).

Have you not seen the 25 year old Peter Kay but about how everyone is your aunt and uncle as a kid, because they have the same hairdresser as your mum or once borrowed your dad's orbital sander. . This isn't new. I'm not sure why you get so angry about it.

They'd actually be second cousins once removed, I think, which is a bit cumbersome for everyday chat. I imagine people want to quickly convey the type of relationship they have with them, and 'niece/nephew' gets the message across succinctly.

'Aunt' (and to some extent uncle) can be used informally in the UK for adults not related to you, as a 'respectful' form of address that's friendlier than Mr/Mrs, but there is a growing trend these days for children to address adults by their first names, so that's possibly why using the terms for actual aunts/uncles is on the wane.

My niece has had a baby and my DD is definitely an Auntie! We are super close to my DN, 'first cousin once removed' doesn't quite cut it 😄

I also have friends that are 'Auntie' to my DC.

I wouldn’t say this is a recent trend. I’m 40 and I grew up calling my parents cousins (and there were many) aunty and uncle and their kids my cousins. Maybe it depends on family dynamics

In Hawaii, random unknown children call you "aunty." That would really give you the rage.

What a sad world we live in when people care so much about what other people do. Why does it matter to you? It doesn’t affect you at all

Im auntie to some of my friends children and probably will be to my cousins children. It takes a village to raise a child and I think it’s lovely to recognise the people you love and who love you children, regardless of official family relationship.

Well for some cultures your cousin's children are your nieces and nephews. Your cousins are like your siblings.

I just call them all "cousins", regardless of generation or relative age.

easier than saying "first cousin once removed"? possibly

Not that it changes, the discussion, but no.

Your cousin's children are your first cousins once removed - you and your cousin are first cousins, and their kids are one generation removed from you.

Your kids and your cousin's kids are second cousins.

Your kids and your cousin's kids' kids are second cousins once removed.

At least it’s quicker than saying ‘first cousins once removed’ which I think is the official term. (I’m sure someone will know if I’m wrong.)
Dd’s children refer to DD’s cousin’s kids as their cousins.

I’m close to my cousin. We’re like sisters. Same age. No sisters. She has no kids, nor does my other cousin, her brother. My kids call her “Aunty xxxx”. I’ve no idea if she refers to my kids as her nieces or nephew. Maybe? It’s less of a mouthful than ‘my cousins kids’.

I don’t know why you get irrationally angry about it! I’m sure you don’t, do you? Maybe irrationally irked? Perturbed? Bothered?

@McSpoot thank you! I’d always wondered!

Tbh I always get mixed up because of my siblings and my siblings children. I am auntie to my brother's kids obviously, but his kids are younger than my nephews kids. So although my nephew from my sister is my brother's child's cousin (he's in his 30s), my brother's kids are 2 and 6months, I always think he's their uncle. But he's their first cousin.

Everyone close to my DC who doesn't already have a title gets called aunty or uncle, our cousins, neighbours, friends, distant relatives. We were raised the same way. Our family especially is really big and all the cousins, around 17 of us ranging from ages 35 to 23, have had kids at the same time and spend a lot of time together, we are all aunts and uncles to all the kids. It's lovely x

Never called my aunties “auntie x”. My kids just call them by their names. We get auntie cards etc for birthdays. Just feels like a mouthful to me.

close kids in the family are also referred to as cousins as it’s easier than frankly saying you’re second cousin twice removed is turning 7 tomorrow.

what does it really matter?

You have to call them something, and they're still family, so YABU.

What else do you want to call them?

We just call them all cousins.

My daughter does this with some of my cousins kids (the 3 are likes basically), we've corrected her and it's something she'll grow out of but I'm not massively pushed about it seeing as we see them maybe 2-3 times a year.

I put it down to her being an only child and the 3 cousins she does have all live abroad so she definitely feels a bit jealous of her friends who have a rake of siblings or cousins around every weekend.