Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think she lied and actually went?

89 replies

Summersparkles123 · 10/06/2025 07:36

My friend/work colleague was off sick yesterday. However we were suppose to be going to a concert early evening. I told her I couldn't go due to a large unexpected cost and couldn't afford the travel there. She was fine about it and said she would sell our tickets. I said I was happy to sell it cheaper if she wanted to go with someone else. She said no and said she could only get max. 100 for them. I looked on resell sights and said oh they are going for more though.
Anyway she said she sold them for 100. I had doubts she was telling the truth anyway.
Then yesterday she wasn't at work. I totally forgot about the concert but just realised she probably went. I know people may say she was actually ill. I know what she's like and I highly doubt that.
I'm not annoyed she went, I'm more annoyed she lied to me. I'm also annoyed that she made out she could only get 100 for it the ticket when I know she could have got more on a resell sight. She also hasn't paid me the money for my ticket yet.
Lesson learnt not to trust her anymore.

OP posts:
CopperWhite · 10/06/2025 07:40

You let her down for the concert, so at that point it’s up to her what she does. She’s not obliged to find you best price for your ticket after you dropped out. Why didn’t you offer to do the selling? In your position I’d have offered to let her have the ticket for nothing so that she could find someone else to take more easily. Be glad she didn’t miss out because you let her down.

Notsuchafattynow · 10/06/2025 07:41

So you dropped out leaving her with the hassle of finding a short notice replacement who wanted to pay top dollar or drop out herself so she could sell the pair?

The right thing to do would be to forfeit the cost so she can find a friend to take.

Very unreasonable for you to feel miffed!!!

DelphiniumBlue · 10/06/2025 07:42

I think you haven’t been great in all of this, pulling out after the tickets have been bought. Maybe it should have been you dealing with selling the ticket.
If it matters to you, you could ask her if she went as you noticed she wasn’t in work. And ask to transfer any money due to you if she sold your ticket.
But for you to mutter darkly about “ lesson learned “ is a bit much, given you were the one who cancelled.

Bluebluetuesday · 10/06/2025 07:44

How much notice did you give her that you wouldn't be going?

verityveritas · 10/06/2025 07:48

You told her you were happy to sell for cheaper, did you stipulate a price you wanted?
maybe she wanted shot of the tickets, and maybe if she is genuinely ill, it’s slipped her mind to pay you back?
just send her a text a long the lines of ‘Hi X, hope you are feeling better. Is there any chance you can transfer my ticket sale today, as I could really do with the money. Cheers Summersparkles.

materialgworl · 10/06/2025 07:52

she has done everything right, suck it up as your loss for the inconvenience you caused (even if you couldn’t control it)

all these thoughts can’t have come from the ticket matter, you already don’t like or trust her

PhilippaGeorgiou · 10/06/2025 07:53

Lesson learnt not to trust her anymore.

Lesson learned not to plan going anywhere with you.

You let her down. You left her to sort out the mess you made. You don't get to accuse her of being a liar and a thief.

ToKittyornottoKitty · 10/06/2025 07:54

You are being a CF, you let her down because of your own finances and expected her to resell your ticket and give you the money? Most people would have given her the ticket for free so she could still go with someone else. If I was her I wouldn’t bother with you again

Renabrook · 10/06/2025 07:54

Lesson learnt you couldn't make it so she went, you are not a child but a mature fully grown intelligent adult so it might benefit you to practise being one, I dont see what she has done wrong

DappledThings · 10/06/2025 07:56

She doesn't owe you anything; neither money or the truth when you dropped out. I'd imagine she's pretty hurt and pissed off with you

milesmachine · 10/06/2025 07:57

Agree with majority on here that actually you are the CF and if she did take someone else who paid £100 for the tickets then I say good for her for not letting them go to waste and making something out of a ruined night.

Sorry but YABVU

It was her night too-so what if she still went?

Zanatdy · 10/06/2025 07:59

Sorry OP but agree you’re the one in the wrong. If I drop out of something I don’t expect a refund.

TeenLifeMum · 10/06/2025 08:02

It’s so disappointing when flakey friends drop out, even more so when you’re left with the hassle of seeing tickets. If I were you I’d feel so guilty I’d just be happy to think she went with a friend and enjoyed it.

Edenmum2 · 10/06/2025 08:02

You should have asked her for your ticket so you could get more, but you should have sorted it. She can do what she likes with hers.

MoistVonL · 10/06/2025 08:04

You’re the problem. You dropped out. You’re lucky to get anything for the ticket.

UpliftingMoments · 10/06/2025 08:06

Did you offer to pay for her ticket if she wasn’t going to be able to go? I hate people who drop out and make no effort to sort out the problem they have left behind.

5128gap · 10/06/2025 08:06

Letting someone down for something they've paid a lot of money to do with you is really bad form. The least you can do in the circumstances is still pay for your ticket and let them salvage what they can from the night.

Original poster
Summersparkles123 · 10/06/2025 08:08

ToKittyornottoKitty · 10/06/2025 07:54

You are being a CF, you let her down because of your own finances and expected her to resell your ticket and give you the money? Most people would have given her the ticket for free so she could still go with someone else. If I was her I wouldn’t bother with you again

I had an accident which i couldn't help so it's not like I purposely couldn't go. I gave a month's notice. She had the tickets and I did offer to sell them but she said no its fine. I haven't seen any evidence that she listed them or sold them. She told me the day after I told her that she had sold them

OP posts:
SparklyBrickViper · 10/06/2025 08:09

Don’t be THAT person Op.

You bailed. You expect her to do your admin for a refund.

I hope she had a fabulous time.

Sauvin · 10/06/2025 08:10

Once you dropped out, you lost the money you’d spent on the ticket. Anything you get back now is a bonus.

Zippidydoodah · 10/06/2025 08:11

Scuse me? You let her down and now you’re grumbling about the money? Not acceptable, is it? You could ask her if she sold the ticket and if so, could you have some money back, but she might have just given it to a friend or family member who came along last minute due to you letting her down.

Zippidydoodah · 10/06/2025 08:12

So now it’s an accident and not an unexpected bill?

you were unreasonable, op. Just accept it and move on.

whitewineandsun · 10/06/2025 08:12

PhilippaGeorgiou · 10/06/2025 07:53

Lesson learnt not to trust her anymore.

Lesson learned not to plan going anywhere with you.

You let her down. You left her to sort out the mess you made. You don't get to accuse her of being a liar and a thief.

This! Imagine thinking she's the issue.

Caravaggiouch · 10/06/2025 08:14

You are the one who dropped out, for whatever reason. She’s the one who shouldn’t trust you in future, not the other way round.

whitewineandsun · 10/06/2025 08:15

told her I couldn't go due to a large unexpected cost and couldn't afford the travel there.

I had an accident which i couldn't help so it's not like I purposely couldn't go

Which story is it?