Cafe’s reply to my review - is it any wonder places are struggling?

[KatieWa]

I reviewed a lovely cafe I visited last week whilst on holiday in Devon. I was really complimentary about the breakfast and said we found the service to be friendly and efficient. My review ended by suggesting the sign above the door isn’t overly appropriate - it stated ‘nobody leaves sober’. As someone who has a family member who has had numerous alcohol issues over the years I found this poor taste, and diplomatically worded this in the review.

The owner (publicly) replied to my review and said that’s the first feedback they’ve ever had about the sign and suggested everyone else has had a sense of humour when they’ve seen it.

I don’t think it’s a situation to make light of - is it any wonder the sector is on its knees struggling currently with this sort of attitude from a business owner?

The sign does sound cringey, and like it cheapens the place. Why leave a review tho? It’s beggy , and thankless.

Well, nobody made them when they were.
Was that meant to guilt me?

Agree. What a stupid sign. I wouldn’t have been laughing at this promotion of drunkenness. I’d probably have avoided the place.

I’d imagine dozens of people replying to voting also have family members who sufffer with alcoholism and wouldn’t have even given a second thought to the sign.
This is like when Demi Levato found the sign saying “low fat” in the ice cream shop triggering.

I do find a lot of business owners don’t respond well to constructive feedback, they usually show themselves up in their online reply.

Theres a sign up in my local butty shop that says “why don’t you ask for a free knuckle butty?”

i do like that sign though

Omg. This has given me a laugh this morning. Get over yourself OP.

Coming up to 5 years sober.
I wouldn’t have given the sign a second thought.
However, before I was AF, when I didn’t think I had any issues with alcohol, I would have maybe been a bit bothered about it if I was going in there with alcoholic DF, so I can sort of see where OP is coming from. I would have been sensitive about it thinking it may trigger DF. I now realise it wouldn’t.
I also wouldn’t have mentioned it in a review though.

I can understand how the sign would hit a nerve with anyone affected by alcoholism.

How businesses respond to reviews says a lot about their professionalism. I hope they thanked you for the feedback and particularly all the positive things you said.

My dad’s an alcoholic and it wouldn’t cross my mind to take against the sign, never mind mention it in a review of a place that we’d had a nice time in!

I can see why the owner might have bit back at that, OP.

My son hates music. Hei has a processing disorder where he hears noise rather than music.

Shall I complain about everywhere that plays music because he doesn't like it and there's no need for it in a cafe?

Perhaps you hit a nerve. Maybe the sign seems out of place because it's a tribute to a friend, family member or customer who is no longer with them.

Do the same rules about triggering apply to the business owner?

Really it should be a non event for everyone so I'd guess there's more to it on both sides.

Again, I think the joke is that it is a play on words.

You expect to see the sign at the pub but it’s in a cafe. So you you read the sign as meaning ‘no one leaves here not drunk’ but it’s a cafe which probably doesn’t sell alcohol but at a place where you meet friends and family and socialise

so the meaning of the sign means ‘no one leaves here sad’ which is the play on words on the other meaning of the word sober

thats the joke! The play on words element. I actually think its quite clever!

I do think its poor taste too. I guess there are more people who agree but wouldnt bother to write a review about it.
If I was in your shoes re alcohol issues I might be also tempted to tell them though. I learned over the time its not going to get me anywhere and it just causes raised eyebrowes, not understanding. In my case its got to do with somewhat autistic perception of that sigh that would not find it funny at all.

I don’t understand why a cafe would have that sign?

A pub, it makes total sense, but a cafe?

I didn’t even realise that cafes sell alcohol? When I think of a cafe I think of a little shop that sells breakfasts and light snacks served alongside a cup of tea or coffee 🤷‍♀️

Your comment was a bit hypercritical, but I find the whole concept of getting drunk in a cafe a little confusing?

Maybe cafes are more fun in Devon than where I live 🤣

Hi OP @KatieWa i agree, it’s tasteless and weird. A pub near me had to take a similar sign down as there was a local campaign about it. Alcohol ruins people’s lives, people wouldn’t be okay with a sign encouraging heroin but for some reason alcohol is okay. Well done for saying something, unfortunately there is a weird attitude to alcohol in this country so don’t expect many sympathetic responses. X

A pub had to take a sign about alcohol down, due to a “campaign”…. What a load of nonsense!

if the “protestors” were that concerned about the sign and alcohol, I suggest they keep out of the pub and leave the patrons to enjoy themselves.

This is a seriously weird take. It’s a licensed cafe, not a crack den.

There are licensed cafes everywhere. Theres a french one ten minutes walk from us.

If you think this attitude is why the hospitality industry is suffering - you’re delusional to what is happening regards cost of living 🙈🤦‍♀️

What I’m trying to say is, encouraging irresponsible alcohol consumption (what the pub sign I’m talking about was doing) is dangerous. Alcohol ruins lives as drugs do, but it’s just legal.

Of course. My reply said "we will now think about making changes..." It didn't say anything changes would be made.

However. If the business wants to make it clear they will not make changes they could phrase it

"...after much thought we have decided to continue with the sign in place for now, but will continue to review the situation...." or something like that.

Reviews should always be professional and if I ever read defensive replies from companies it puts me right off the company....

There were some drunk women on the train yesterday early evening.

They were recanting a group disagreement earlier in the evening. It was a blow by blow account with reenactment and commentary.

Twas was fully hilarious. Better than telly. I was disappointed when I had to get off.

People are so po faced these day. Getting slashed once in a while would probably take people's focus off perfect insta photos, pumping iron and their face full of fillers for a minute so they could actually have fun.

No sign is going to make someone an alcoholic neither is a night out on the piss every now and again.

It wasn’t nonsense. It was a sign that said something to the effect of ‘having money problems? Not getting on with your wife? Hate your job? Don’t worry, no one leaves here sober and sad’. A horrific sign. And it was huge and on the pavement so you didn’t have to be in the pub to see it.

Yanbu to raise an eyebrow at the sign, and yanbu to mention it in your review, but you are weird and unreasonable to link this in any way to "why businesses are struggling". The challenges of running a small business have nothing to do with a sense of humour clash between one specific business owner and one specific customer. Issues of cost of living crisis, increased costs of ingredients, increases in NI contributions for employers and a generally struggling global economy really are not affected by this situation.

Having seen 2 families ripped apart by alcoholism, and the number of people living with the consequences, it is no laughing matter. I wouldn't set foot in an establishment with a sign like that!

It’s a weird sign to have and I’d probably go elsewhere.