Cafe’s reply to my review - is it any wonder places are struggling?

[KatieWa]

I reviewed a lovely cafe I visited last week whilst on holiday in Devon. I was really complimentary about the breakfast and said we found the service to be friendly and efficient. My review ended by suggesting the sign above the door isn’t overly appropriate - it stated ‘nobody leaves sober’. As someone who has a family member who has had numerous alcohol issues over the years I found this poor taste, and diplomatically worded this in the review.

The owner (publicly) replied to my review and said that’s the first feedback they’ve ever had about the sign and suggested everyone else has had a sense of humour when they’ve seen it.

I don’t think it’s a situation to make light of - is it any wonder the sector is on its knees struggling currently with this sort of attitude from a business owner?

It's like those old office signs

We're not all mad here but it helps

Not funny but were everywhere in the 70s

I find mentioning the sign OTT but I find the response telling, if the bulk of the review was good then a nod to the little critique with a thank you for your feedback would have been much better.

The sign is a bit naff and also a bit weird for a cafe as most cafes are open during the day rather than into the night. But I am a child of alcoholics and when you have emotional/childhood trauma, life is about dealing with “triggering” things rather than expecting others to change small things for you

You made yourself look petty by that comment op. Well done on the cafe response. Take it you not visiting again so lost out on a good cafe. What were the cakes like? Do love a good tray bake.

I don't go to the pub to get drunk either, a bit merry maybe and I can also do that in a cafe.
It's true that small towns in the UK tend to only have cafes open 9-5 selling tea, coffee, etc. but in cities cafe-bars are quit popular, luckily, because it's not always nice to be a woman alone in a pub-type environment and cafes can be much nicer.

That’s fine but the sign makes reference to not being sober (ie drunk) so it doesn’t really make sense for a cafe.

Oh dear. Not being sober doesn't necessarily mean being drunk. It could mean being tipsy or merry. You can become tipsy or merry in a cafe just as well as you can in a pub.

Yes, my nearest town has a lot of 'naice' cafes that sell artisan beers and wines and liqueur coffees.

I personally dislike cafes as a rule. I dont like that they all feel quite cramped and there's a limited time one can take up a table without feeling impolite, and I'm quite happy sitting in a pub alone with a glass of wine and a book, It's one of my life's pleasures. But I totally understand why a lot of women would prefer a cafe.

Same thing isn’t it? Though merry isn’t blind drunk of course

Taking a table is less of a problem when you're drinking alcohol actually because you usually have a few drinks without too much of a break whereas multiple cups of tea is less enticing. Cafes also have their quiet times of course.

What's the same thing? That you can get tipsy in a cafe just as you can in a pub? Yes, absolutely and there was nothing wrong with the sign. It didn't say 'come here to be an alcoholic'.

I never said it did.

The review culture has led a lot of people to feel self-important.

I was answering the main point of the thread. OP seems to think that not being sober is the same as being an alcoholic. She said she objected to the sign because she has relatives who are alcoholics.

A bit of a strange sign to have up in a cafe... In my experience, most cafes don't serve alcohol anyway...
But to comment on it... That's pretty sad. Even more so as it's not even you with the history of alcoholism. You got all offended on behalf of someone who wasn't even there.

I don't think this went the OP wanted it to - not surprised they haven't posted again!

YANBU.

A review is a personal opinion. You didn't like the sign and stated at much. I thought the reply from the owner was thinned skinned and over the top. Not a good look for them.

That's it then. A little bottle of wine makes all gardeners alcoholics.
I damn knew it, my daughter who's apparently teatotal spends a lot of time at her allottment.
I think the Allottment Association should put a sign up.
"No one leaves here sober."

But it's so much fun. Sorry but it's perfectly acceptable to get drunk and have a good time. If you are one of the, thankfully small, percentage of people who are alcoholic then for them no it's not, but for the rest of us I don't think the fun police should get involved.

Getting drunk can be very very very funny.

Are you asking for a friend , or you want the address?

Biggest bloody fuss ever over a sign,
I used to smoke and drank spirits very heavily for years. Until I decided to stop. Teatotal for years now, but I don't expect anyone not to indulge in drinking around me, or disapprove of them doing so.

This, "I'm right, so you'll do it my way", is becoming tedious. It developed by the awful curtain twitchers during covid and is still here with priggish people.

As for you knowing someone who died from alcoholism. I know two relatives who died in a car crash. Should I be complaining about manufacturers advertising cars to sell?

As someone who is just over one year sober, and who will always struggle with alcohol addiction, I'd see the sign as 'different strokes for different folks'.

Yes, alcohol is a huge presence in our society, and far too many drink far too much. Others don't. It's legal, it's here, and we have to live with it.

Alcohol humor is also a big thing, and like all humor, some find it funny, some do not.

Absolutely, she’s no doubt brewing her own alcohol from rhubarb!

Oh, and I'm afraid I would definitely need my toes and my fingers to count how many relatives of mine have died from alcoholism and related causes.

Too upset at people talking about alcohol, it’s oh so upsetting mentioning drinking and then drinking to excess.

So upsetting she started a whole thread on it!

If you don't have more important things to think about, you need to find some.