Group of friends all in our early 30’s, been friends coming on 15 years. Recently found out i was pregnant after known fertility issues , but with that came a lot of anxiety and illness, so I politely declined 2 or 3 group events due to not feeling well, both physically and mentally.
I unfortunately had a miscarriage and messaged in the group to apologise for being distant, but that this had gone on and I was sorry for not saying anything, only one of the 7 girls replied. Since then, the group have been meeting up and not inviting me. I messaged one and asked if there was a problem, to which I got a long reply about how most of the girls felt uncomfortable that I didn’t tell them I was pregnant.
I messaged each girl individually to apologise again for being distant but that I just felt like I wanted to keep it to myself at the time, I am now on anti depressants to help with how I’ve been feeling mentally and that I would try to make more of an effort with the group again. Each girl took over a day to reply to me, and all sent back pretty much word for word the same answer, so there is obviously a group chat I’m not in and they have all screenshotted my message and discussed what they would reply.
One of them replied to say “well you know everyone has things going on” which i absolutely appreciate, and is why I kept things to myself in the first place, because I didn’t want to burden them.
Since then I have tried to make arrangements both in the group chat (which got ignored) and reached out to individual girls, one of which replied saying “I’m free in about 4 months”
I feel like the worst friend in the world, all I was trying to do was navigate a tricky time and open up to my friends when I felt ready to, without dumping all my problems onto them as I know everyone has their own lives and issues.
AIBU to be upset with their reactions?