Judged for working only 30hours a week!

[layback]

I work thirty hours a week, this is so I can care for my children before school and after as there are no after school activities or care available. I am constantly judged by others who make remarks like "alright for you part timer" or "well I work full time so don't have time for xyz" we have no family nearby and financially can afford this. It does at times feel like I'm not seen as doing anything of value! It's 7.5 hours less than what's considered full time!

Just say ‘yes, it’s great - why don’t you do it?’ - tip from a teacher who constantly got comments about the long holidays!
Don’t think you have to explain yourself - you’re doing what works for you and your family, and it’s no one else’s business.

Im in a school so I get the comments too about the holidays!!

I’m in a similar position and hate it but I am also convinced that if I was working full time the same people would judge me for another thing.

OP I can really relate to this. I felt like I was treated as a second class citizen at work when I did 30 hours, and also received comments like ‘enjoy your coffee whilst were working’ from make team members. It made me so angry as I’m sure it does you as in fact you are cramming a full time job in to less time and being far more efficient than many others, and then rushing around caring for children too which is a huge accomplishment. Like others have posted unfortunately a lot of the time as mothers we can’t win. My best advice is to not let others have the power to ruin your mood or day. You should be proud of what you’re doing. Also I’m fairly sure these comments are discriminatory and not allowed in the workplace, you can raise with your line manager or HR if they persist.

@layback just tell them your Only Fans account has really taken off so you can’t work more than 30 hours as you’re busy OFing 😁

I work 18 hours (have two primary school aged kids) and feel it’s too much !!! I think 30
plus All the rushing around, clubs , school drops off and pick ups etc must be very hard.

Love, it's jealousy. You are not lazy, anything but. It's none of their business.

People ask me all the time how many hours I work. I think they are hoping I will answer I have increased my hours since I don’t have a young child anymore. I earn quite well working part-time. Due to our individual circumstances my household still needs me part-time more than we need more money. My husband doesn’t feel put out by my hours like other people seem to be. He would be happier if I worked less, but understands why I won’t stop entirely.

I get this is a fact and i do agree that most likely people arent judgy.

But the way its phrased could sound a bit judgy by saying 'i can't, i work full time" instead of 'thats during my working hours'. Plenty of part timers cant do specific times. Not all part timers are available for 3.30 or whatever. There are also full timers who could do 10am coffee etc. They might do nights, or early/late shifts or weekends or split shifts. My mum was a full time nurse and did school pick up.

Who says these things? Is it people at work?
Nobody knows anything about my job at all…

But you are only working part time - so why does this upset you?

Why are you letting other peoples comments bother you ?

I gave up full time work in 1999 - aged 34 - no kids

Worked as and when since. At the moment Im doing just 20 hours - suits me to the ground

Ive never claimed a penny in benefits so what I do, no one person can make judgement on

Just get on with your life and ignore other petty , jealous, narrow minded people

I do 32 . I work for a national company anything 30 hours and above is considered f/t ..

honesty when I have done o/t by the time tax / national insurance and pension are taken out it is pointless.

They would hate me, I only work two days a week. I think you need new friends. I don’t give a crap what other people think. My working pattern works for our family and frankly is no one else’s business

I run my own business and I only work 30 (ish) hours. You can achieve a lot in that time.

Own it. Enjoy it! …. don’t be pressured into FT unless you want it, or need it.

People occasionally comment about my Fridays off, saying lucky for some etc. I say yes it's lovely other than the loss of a day's wage and that they could do it too if they wanted.

Honestly it does pee me off. Some colleagues complain (even cry) about not having enough time with their kids then have new cars and expensive holidays - so they are prioritising cars and holidays over time with their kids. They choice but it is a choice.

Maybe you should say you value being there for your kids more than the loss in wages. They're only young once. Money won't get those years back. Etc.

I work 30 hours per week and I don’t have children - it’s due to health conditions. Tell people to butt out, they’ve no right to judge you - everyone’s circumstances are different.

You sound like you’ve made great choices - many of my mum friends work 4/5 days a week with young children and if my industry allowed it I would love to. You / your husband did the work to develop your careers to the extent you can financially afford this so well done. I’m sure there are also choices you guys don’t get to make - fancier holidays / cars etc because of it and I respect what you’ve chosen to invest your potential excess income in (time with your children) a lot more.

@Fearfulsaints in my experience if i say “sorry, that’s during my work hours” to something like a wednesday 10am coffee morning, the assumption is that Thursday or Monday etc will work. It doesn’t, i work full time, office hours, so its weekends or after 6.
Other people work shift, mornings only, termtime only, so they say “sorry, i work mornings/termtime/shifts to indicate their working patterns. People on shifts can sometimes make 10am. People working term time can make 10am in the holidays. People working mirnings or fulltime can never make 10am.
And so on

I work 3 days a week (I do 9 hour days plus a bit of work from home over that so about 30hours a week total still) as I’m disabled - use walking aids, constant pain etc… people still say “it’s alright for some” and how easy “us part-timers” have it… some people are just idiots 😂 when I was younger, I had slightly petty replies like “yeah, I love being poor and in pain” but now I mostly eye roll and don’t bother correcting them. They won’t change their minds and their opinions won’t change my life x

I suppose to me it's not the full time that's the issue it's the 'standard office hours'

Both my parents did shifts and I do annualised hours so if someone says full time to me that doesn't equal 9-5.30 weekdays, so my mind doesn't automatically go there!

But I think I'm the one out of kilter not you! I think yours is the default thinking.

As someone who's always done shift work my brain does the same as yours.

And these are all jobs we very much need people to do aswell as lunchtime assistants, TA's, Lollipop persons, school kitchen, cleaners etc that are part time. Not to mention all the volunteers. Exactly who do these people think are going to do all these jobs if every single one of us are out working full time.

@Fearfulsaints that makes sense.
For me, its about the pattern and people’s availability.
Shifts are unpredictable, no matter how many hours. even if you only do 1 or 2 shifts a week, your availability is changing, so how many hours you work really isn’t relevant as availability is on a case by case basis. Weekends not necessarily free.
For office hours like patterns, number and time of hours are relevant as they tend to be stable.
Condensed hours: likely 4 manic days (completely unavailable) and one free one. Find out the free one.
fulltime: weekends and after 6.
Parttime: needs to be specified (mornings/termtime/….) to get an idea
No judgement involved - I don’t care. I just want to get an idea on potential availability.

Jealousy. Ignore.