To think that life is too expensive?

[Gffbjjgfddbjkkm]

Feel so frustrated.

I work full-time teaching in one of the most expensive schools in the world. DH works full time too. We each earn about £40k.

I'm having to take on a weekend job, just to be able to scrape by to afford to send DS to university next year. Who wants to work seven days a week?!

Would love a really decent holiday, but can't afford that.

I'm sick of working so hard work with nothing but financial stress. Neither of us is likely to inherit much, if anything.

And her DH teaches at a state school.

But do you get housing support? What about for utilities? Food vouchers? Do your children get school meal vouchers?

I think that the wages in Scotland are a bit better, but you'd need to be in a management post to get anywhere near 70k.

I was getting above 40k in middle management at one point - about 8 yrs ago. I believe that my successor is getting 50+.

Your son could get a job when he’s at uni to pay his way
If you cant live off 80k a year ask yourself wh, where’s the income going

When I started teaching in the mid 2000s it was about £18.5k a year, I only started earning a decent wage once I was on ups and had a tlr- I don’t know if you can get these working private but maybe dh can? I’d definitely do tutoring or exam marking rather than a holiday job. Also you are dbs-ed so babysitting is an option?

Maybe see if you can add your credit card debt to your mortgage and then cut up the card - I assume your ltv is good because 80k left on a house down south must be a small percentage. Or a 0% card is good - Martin money saver is probably most helpful for advice as it’s aimed at people in the uk.

Holidays are so expensive this year it’s unreal - maybe look at short city breaks or extreme day trips as your dc might enjoy the novelty.

Our CT is around £290 a month then gas and elec are £175 a month for both (no solar panels, 4 bed detached house 1980s build in the South East) so a total of £465.

But even at the higher price, that still would leave over £3000 a month spare so doesn't make any difference when it comes to questioning where the rest of the money is going.

Geez Louise!

You've got a tiny mortgage. I paid a similar one alone, whilst being a single parent to two DC, earning £17k a year. This was six years ago.

DC have left home now and I have £11k a year. My car is 16yrs old, mortgage cleared by downsizing. I also live in the SE.

Holidays, well, you can get the £9.50 breaks through The Sun newspaper. That's the only way I managed to take my DC away growing up. These days, I just don't go away.

Where on earth are you going wrong?

Definitely sit down, list every single outgoing and work out where you can cut back. Also address your credit card debt - how did that get so crazy?

Price the same holiday in August. When 2 teachers are able to go on holiday.

She says she gets UC (Universal Credit).
Her £26 thousand includes that.

That figure includes earning and any support. I don't get food vouchers or school meals as I earn too much. I pay prescriptions and glasses etc and all my utilities the same as everyone else. I work full time, just on a low wage, and I'm a single parent.

Just wanted to say solidarity and good wishes OP. It’s very tough economically at the moment and I don’t foresee it getting better sadly. We have a higher household income than you and though we are by no means struggling, we have to keep to a budget and think about all non-essential spending. The fact this is the case for households on incomes of 80-100k should alarm us all. It’s not a race to the bottom and the consequences of prolonged mass purse string tightening by higher earners will be dire for many industries.

The OP will get about £30,000 after income tax and national insurance. She won’t get any of the other things you get when on UC. Presumably your children have a father. Did he ever help with their costs or with housing costs? Do you get any help with housing or utility bills. My utility bills and council tax come to thousands of pound a year. I don’t see how you can afford a holiday on that.

I am well aware of the cost of holidays in half term but on 80 grand a year im sure
they can afford a haven holiday in the uk even if its £700
Or do as we now do when we book abroad with jet 2 pay a deposit then pay it off monthly , book early enough and theres over a year to pay it off
Or just dont have a holiday and save for one next year or the year after. We went for approx 15 years without one and saved up to have our first holiday abroad last year

Can you give us an income/expenses breakdown, OP? £40k each can break down differently depending on pension contributions, if you’re still repaying student loans, taxable benefits like private healthcare for the one teaching in private school?

Your mortgage is pretty small – by comparison we have a similar household income in the SE and ours is £273,000 😭. What’s the breakdown of council tax, energy, water, TV/internet/streaming, insurance – our health and critical illness cover is horrendous thanks to some pre-existing conditions. And how much are repayments on the £9k credit cards? Is there something that can be cut? Or something you’re missing - go through statements ruthlessly.

Second Haven holidays. We’ve got four night for £250 at the end of august; with food, parking, tickets and treats on a strict budget should total £500 for the week (we’re making a day out of the trip down and back), albeit we have National Trust membership to take the edge off days out.

Hahaha.... Nope. DD1 started 2001 in primary, DD2 2007, in primary, both sent to private secondaries, DD2 final year at University now. Our salaries have gone up and down in that time obviously, I worked initially, then gave up work. DH has had good jobs, bad jobs, made redundant, other jobs, self employed, salary up and down like a yo/yo. We have moved house in that time too. You name it, its happened.

Note..... I didn't say we were on the SAME salary, we were on more, but taxed more, and no benefits, due to the drop off.

You have a good income, so the obvious answer is that your outgoings are too high. Which doesn't make sense given that your mortgage is low. What are your outgoings?

Not a chance i'd be getting a "weekend job" to send my child to uni.

It's a little by the by, as it's not what OP asked, but I do disagree.
I was teaching in a private school in the 70s. Fees then were accessible to more parents IMO although some did make sacrifices.

But by the time my own kids were at secondary school, the fees were around £25Kpa ( local good indie schools) so you'd need around £40K gross to fund that, and £80K gross for 2 kids.

Our income was into 6 figures and although we could have sent one child to an indie, not two. Mortgage rates hit 15% at that time too.

Depending on he schools, you must have been earning close to £150K together and maybe a low housing cost?

Average full time income in 2024 was about 46k and it will probably be higher this year, so they are both on below average salaries.

You comment as if they are rolling in it!

@HopscotchBanana Two people on minimum wage is just under £60k.

No. Assuming someone on a minimum hourly rate is doing 8 hours a day and 5 days a week, two people on minimum wage would come out as about £50k.

No it wasn't and isn't.

The median salary for the UK is £37K

ONS statsfor 2024

@MidnightMeltdown Average full time income in 2024 was about 46k and it will probably be higher this year, so they are both on below average salaries.

Where on earth did you get that figure from? £46k is a relatively high salary and is definitely not "average."

Where are you getting that from?

Forbes says the median UK salary for 2024 is 37,430.

https://www.forbes.com/uk/advisor/business/average-uk-salary-by-age/

Can OP's DS commute?

She has already said she works in a school.