How important are appearances when it comes to someone’s job?

[Shallabamba]

Nurse here. Throughout my years of training and years qualified my weight has fluctuated. I’ve been skinny, fat, overweight due to health conditions and then put on weight due to pregnancy and back down to a healthy weight now. I’ve read a fair few threads on here where some posters have said they wouldnt take advice from a fat nurse, I’ve also read numerous articles mainly from the Daily Fail regarding how all nurses sit on our fat arses all day 😂 I also have had fellow nurses who have said would you really take advice from a fat HCP? So I ask you, on this anon public forum would you really judge a fat nurse? Would you think they would less competent than a slim nurse? Or do you think their job has nothing to do with their weight? I also asked myself this question in relation to other jobs, for example would I trust a hairdresser to cut and style my hair if I thought they had really rubbish hair? Or a PT who was out of shape? Are appearances important when it comes to someone’s profession?

It would be difficult to take weight loss advice/listen to advice about how being overweight is bad for you/be told to lose weight by a fat person. I think this is what most people mean. I don't think anyone means they wouldn't take advice on a skin infection/asthma/vaccination etc. from a fat nurse.

You wouldn't want a driving instructor with a suspended license. Or a quit smoking coach who reeks of fags.

Obviously, they'd be perfectly qualified to give out the advice, it's just hard to take advice from someone who clearly isn't listening to it themselves.

I wouldn’t trust an overweight nurse to give me advice on things like weight management, nutrition, or exercise. Everything else… why not?

We only had this thread 3 or 4 days ago.

The way I look at it is if someone goes to the doctor's or hospital presenting with an illness or some sort of ailment, then they're looking for professional advice.

How much the professional weighs is neither here nor there, because if they lost weight, the patient would still be visiting with the same problem.

The thing is, so many overweight people are ashamed of their weight that they lash out, because they don't want to be told they need to lose some.

If they were told by a skinny nurse or doctor that they need to lose weight, they'd lash out just the same and say 'Oh what do they know, they're skinny so they think they're perfect'.

Or some such nonsense that deflects the fact they really need to lose weight.

I can understand what you’re saying. I think the issue of weight is that there are many health conditions and medication that can lead to weight gain, so it’s not always the case that they are simply not following their own advice.

I didn’t see that thread.

To a certain degree yes. Being lectured by an HCP who is considerably more overweight than you can be difficult although if your excess weight is causing health problems it may not be the same for them. I think if they encouraging rather than dictatorial it is less of a problem.
I’m an HCP who regularly has to give smoking cessation advice. Being an ex smoker does mean I understand the difficulty involved and patients are often more receptive if I approach the subject by admitting that I’m an ex smoker.
Weight loss is a particularly difficult subject as is healthy eating. I tend to start with facts re the benefits. I have endocrine problems which mean to lose weight I have to concentrate on low carb. When patients comment on my successful weight loss and ask how I did it I explain the science and suggest changes.
I have insulin resistance and weight is a constant struggle but when patients can see effective solutions they are often more receptive to advice.

Ultimately you have to want to stop smoking, lose weight, stop drinking in order to be successful and I always begin any conversation with the question “Do you want to….?” If they don’t I then follow this up with “When you do…. and provide pathways.

So if an obese HCP tells me I need to lose weight it will depend on how they approach the subject rather than their appearance.

Why though?

They may not be lacking in knowledge, just personal willpower.

Yes I think it can be a case of practice what you preach. If the advice they are giving is good, then why aren't they following it? Would you trust a dentist with rotten teeth?

I’d judge a fat nurse who was trying to give me weight loss advice.

Not always, but often enough that it's a fair assumption. The majority of overweight people are such because they don't eat/exercise sensibly. It's a minority who are unavoidably fat because of medication/illness.

I have coached people in becoming fitter and through weight management. Diet and exercise only work if done consistently over time. If one can’t stick to the recommendations, they’re not effective recommendations.

So it’s like, okay, if you’re telling me I need to do xyz to manage my weight… why haven’t you done it? If you haven’t been able to stick to doing it, why are you recommending it?

I think the people who won't take advice from overweight doctors and nurses won't take it anyway, from anyone.

Let's face it, the majority of the world has the internet at their fingertips, they don't need to be told face to face how to lose weight.

So the weight of the advice giver is a red herring.

Yes I would. The consultant in charge of my prenatal care with my 4th baby with GDM was obese and could hardly walk. I asked to switch to a different consultant. She was so large she shuffled and couldn’t walk properly also was about 2 hours late for every appointment. I had zero respect for her for a combination of these reasons.

similar to why I would not employ a nanny or childminder who doesn’t have children-I just don’t trust them - they may have the head knowledge but not the heart experience

Why are you assuming they tried to lose weight when they're not the ones needing medical help?

If the advice giver was slim, the patient would still be fat and they'd still have to find the willpower to change their weight regardless.

They'll undoubtedly be told they're risking getting diabetes amongst many other things, and that's what they'll have to live with long after they've forgotten what the advice giver even looks like.

Why? The medical advice they would be giving you would be the same whether the nurse was fat or thin. They may have a medical condition which means losing weight is more difficult or simply struggle with will power.

I think the NHS has a very outdated view on weight loss, it’s something that I don’t particular agree with. BMI for example, doesn’t take muscle mass into consideration, an Olympian would be considered obese. As said in my pp, there are health conditions that can lead to weight gain. I had an undiagnosed thyroid problem. Despite taking my own advice i was still fat. Luckily they found out what the problem was. I however fast, there’s plenty of research out there that shows the benefits and I have lost weight from doing this. But it’s not a tool the NHS use. Dr Micheal Mosley and his wife have wrote numerous books on this and the benefits and also Dr Tim Spector.

I do see why people think like that, but having a partner who works in the NHS and seeing how difficult it is for him to go to the gym, work random shifts and deal with night shifts and the temptation of biscuits... I would take advice.

If they’re medical professionals, and they’re making weight managements suggestions to others… Surely they know the ill effects of being overweight, and have tried to manage their own weight? Especially if they’re claiming to know how to do it. I’ve been overweight before and I felt like hot garbage. I don’t know why anyone wouldn’t try to get back into the healthy range if they knew a sustainable way of doing so.

See, willpower is a limited thing. You have to build it up slowly, and use external factors to help you. Like, you don’t overhaul your diet completely and cold turkey overnight, and go on drastic caloric deficits, and go from not exercising to getting up every day at 4am to go for a run when you hate running. You absolutely will not stick to that plan. But if you make hardly noticeable changes to your diet to make it better little by little, with a slight caloric deficit, and you find a form of exercise that you actually like doing, and do it at a time that works for you… You’re much more likely to be successful, because you’re not going to feel overwhelmingly deprived, starving, tired, or dread the very idea of your workout. You don’t have to exert nearly as much willpower, and as you adjust to the changes and form habits, they come to take no willpower at all. Then you can push yourself a bit further,

Because that is their job and maybe they don't want to lose weight or put in the effort to lose weight. Or maybe they have tried and can't. That doesn't mean that they should stop doing their job. I mean should an oncologist who is a chain smoker and has lung cancer not advise his patients to stop smoking?

Interesting you said about the nanny thing. Would you be okay with seeing a male midwife? Just I’ve had this talk several times with other colleagues and my old nursing lecturer said he, yes as a male he didn’t think men should be midwives or gynecologists.

He should still advise his patients to stop smoking, but he shouldn't really be surprised when they judge him/roll their eyes.

In these circumstance though I think it'd actually be MORE effective. Being told to stop smoking by someone with lung cancer has to be more effective than being told to quit by someone who has never smoked/is in perfect health.

Way more people are “skinny fat” (within a normal BMI range, but with a low percentage of muscle mass and too high a percentage of body fat) than there are people who are in the overweight category because they have a high percentage of muscle mass (and even then, the latter would still probably be healthier having slightly less mass in general, as more mass = greater strain on the internal organs.) BMI isn’t perfect, but it’s functional for the vast majority of the population, and it’s a lot easier to measure than body fat percentage.

So all the overweight people who don't think it's appropriate to be advised on healthy eating, exercise and weightloss by another overweight person.

I take it you don't teach your own kids about healthy eating and exercise etc?

I mean why should they take advice from an overweight person?

I didn’t say fat medical professionals should stop doing their jobs. It’s just that I wouldn’t take their advice w/re: weight management, diet, and exercise because it’s very likely they’re not taking their own advice.

Everyone knows smoking is terrible for you. But if I’m a smoker, and I know my doctor’s a smoker, and s/he says “Stop smoking. Here’s how…” I’m gonna seek out different advice as to how to go about tobacco cessation, you know?

I was told to lose weight by a stick thin GP with zero personality or empathy. I equally disregarded her professional opinion as she clearly has no idea of the complex struggle involved with weight/food.