to find this rude…

[curlygirlietwirly]

Our new neighbours have a child who my son plays with outside in the communal garden. Today the mum came to ask me something, my son opened the door (he’s almost 12) and shouted for me that Nadia (fake name) was at the door. By the time I’d got to the hallway, she was inside my home almost in my lounge!! She entered my home without being invited and I felt really uncomfortable, as I’ve only met her once before shortly after they moved in a few weeks ago…
Am I BU to find this rude???

If so, advice on how to tackle this!?!?

Thank you! I didn’t mean tackle her in a rude way, I meant how can I prevent this situation happening again. I’m also not stealing mad, I just felt really uncomfortable and so did my husband😅

Take that Nadia!

if you are that bothered, answer the door yourself and ... don't let her in?

How do people manage in life I'll never know.

Tackle her? I'd say get yourself into a strong rugby squat and charge!! In the future try doing the hakka before she can enter just to make your point 🤔🤣

"I just felt really uncomfortable and so did my husband"

Unless there was something decidedly dodgy about Nadia like she was drunk or stoned or I happened to be in my underwear when she walked in - I really don't think most people would be that uncomfortable about this. I mean, you kind off know her, she isn't a complete stranger or a door to door salesman/Jehova's Witness or something. Was she touching things in your living room or having a good nose around, or was she just standing there waiting for you?

I’d write her a letter and put it through her door telling her never to do that again. Either that, or I’d not give it a moment’s thought.

I don't find it 'rude' as such, because people have different cultural and family norms and there isn't a universally recognised rule about this. I can see why you didn't much like it, but find it a bit odd that you and your dh are actually disturbed by it.

This.
Teach your child to say "Please come in, I'll just get Mum", for anyone he or you know even a little, or alternatively for complete strangers "Please wait a moment, I'll just get Mum" then to shut the door so that the stranger can't enter.

Up here (Yorkshire) people tend to knock and walk in.
I don't mind

@tuvamoodyson I mean I’m tiny, I wouldn’t even stand a chance to move her if I tried 😂😂😂😂

Thanks for all the responses, I suppose it’s just how we were brought up!!

…or Nadia was in hers! 👀

you are far too reasonable and sensible to post on AIBU 😂

Interesting how it’s the neighbour who is being considered ‘rude’ in an area where there are so many different legitimate ways to react while the child who clearly opened the door and at least enabled the neighbours behaviour is not even mentioned in the equation.

Aww are you just an ikkle tiny girlie whirly

Well one is a child and the other is an adult for starters.
There's not going to be a unanimous consensus about a situation like this because we all have our own boundaries and tolerances. And these will all have grey areas and nuances based on subtle differences in the nature of the relationships.
I'm one of those people that dislike surprise visitors and feel protective of my home environment. I know plenty of people that are completely different. Open house, the more the merrier, "drop in when you're passing" type of people.
Neither is right or wrong, just different.
If my neighbours call round to ask a favour or to tell me something, we chat on the doorstep. I wouldn't ask them in and wouldn't expect to be invited in when I pop over to ask/tell them something or handover a parcel etc. Seems to work well and is a friendly and supportive place to live.
If a child has been playing at my house ('playdate') and a parent calls to collect, then I'd invite them in. Just an example of the grey area.

But my default for a ring at the bell, would be doorstep initially because it's likely to be a brief interaction. If it transpires to be different, I can choose to invite them in.

Without an express invitation to come in, I would never enter someone's house, and I taught my dd that.

I disagree. Simply knowing someone a little doesn't mean they are a safe person. Do you teach your children it's ok to get in a car with someone they "know a little?" I hope not. Why is it ok to let them into your house?. What if you're not home? Is there a different rule? Again, I hope so.

“Almost in my lounge” 😂

I wouldn’t just walk in but I also wouldn’t have my child answer the door.

Yes @Gogodonu, is that ok???

@JMSAnot sure why this snippet of the sentence is funny, but I’m glad you’re having a good day x

Well my child lives in the same house we do so if they let somone in i don't see it different to of us

@CorrectionCentre thank you for understanding my perspective! I grew up as a child in an area that wouldn’t be considered “safe”, someone you have only ever said hello to entering the house would warrant a panic!
Our home is ours and our children’s safe space, the neighbour is essentially a stranger as we know nothing about her at all!
We would also talk at the doorstep for a brief interaction and wouldn’t be likely to have a lengthy one anyway as we usually all (adults) keep ourselves to ourselves, even if our children play outside together

He didn’t “let her in”, he opened the door and shouted for me that she was at the door for me

Im sorry you grew up in a scary place OP. Doesn't sound like Nadia was launching a home invasion but maybe get a door chain if this left you feeling so uncomfortable and in need of coping strategies.