DP friends wife, AIBU?

[MooreMooreMoore]

DP has a big group of former colleagues and their partners who regularly meet up. They are all really nice, one woman insists on prefixing my name with ‘young’ eg. Can you pass the wine to ‘young Emma’. I am the only Emma, so she’s not differentiating between old and young Emma.
We are all within a 4 year age range, I’m the same age as half the group including her husband, we all have comparable education and success levels.
I need a nice retort to put a stop to it, but something that won’t highlight me as the problem, but it’s annoying me, she’s ever so nice, but it still feels I dunno belittling.
AIBU? Is it me? Would this annoy you?

Nope, but a good theory

Ironically I’m a grandma and she’s not

In that case maybe embrace the "young" label and play on it. When I was born x was number one. What was number one when you were born or was it before they started doing charts?

How often does this happen? Once during dinner or like 10 times?

Yes you’ve put into words exactly how it feels!
I’m not really close to the group, more on the periphery, I’m not in contact with anyone outside of the dinner parties.

I’d guess 3 -4 times per dinner.

She would be Old whateverhernameis at the next party

This really tickled me 😂

Perhaps when there is a lull in conversation, you could ask her why she insists on call you young Emma, as you find it a bit weird?

Honestly I would ignore her. You know she’s probably doing this as some sort of power/control thing as you’re on the periphery of the group.

So I think, just don’t engage with it at all. I think she’s wanting some sort of reaction from you, that she can use against you.

the next time she calls you “young Emma” just be like omg thank you so much and act as if she’s saying you look good for your age

Call her by a different wrong name every time you see her.

I’ll have to take a pin to drop after I’ve said it 😂

This is genius 😂 mean girl names.

I definitely think she's doing this deliberately to needle you for some reason. I would ignore her and try really hard not to have resting bitch face(not good at this). I'd be friendly but superficially so and move away from her. That's what I would like to do. I expect a frozen face and a glare would be more likely.

Can you ask her why she does it?

What is her initial so we can think of a suitable name for her?

Scrap that one then ,just go for calling her a wrong name each time 😭

Just ask her why she’s calling you young Emma.

Jesus, Mumsnet.

I do wonder what would happen if I responded with “thank you young Louise”,
“yes young Louise”, “no young Louise”.
Just let her know I’ve clocked her 🤔

I could, but she is so nice, I’d appear to be the problem

M

I'd just ask if there was an inside joke I was missing and reiterate that I prefer to be called Emma.

A problem to who? Just ask her.

I wouldn’t ask about any inside joke but when everyone was there (so they all hear you) I would nicely say I prefer to be called Emma. That way you’re not putting a judgement on her saying it (I think you’re right to have one but that’s the bit you don’t want to come across to the others if they view her in a favourable light).

She's doing this to remind you you're an outsider in this group of pre-existing friends. Which is remarkable given you're all old enough to grown children by the sound of things.

Just tell her to stop it. Why do you care if you look like that bad one? Let them think what they like. It bothers you, so make it stop. Don't need to be passive aggressive or mean. Just a simple "Maureen, the "young" is getting irritating now, can you just call me Emma?". It's not that big a deal.