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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Over 50s. Have you outgrown/got bored of anything?

653 replies

JumpingDizzy · 27/05/2025 15:47

Mine is spas or spa days. I used to love them. Went to one recently and was so bored.

Dh and I camped (tent) recently and the place was so peaceful and beautiful I realised I enjoyed this much more than spa days or stays. The weather was good admittedly. But even so walking in the beautiful dales was so therapeutic. Also the wild swimming under waterfalls was blissful. Dh and I often camp but have found the best site. Cost less than £60 Inc electric hook up. First time we've used electric.

Dh and I walk lots. Loads of long distance walking. I also walk with friends. So it isn't a new realisation that I love the outdoors. Just a sudden realisation that spa days bore me now.

Have you outgrown anything? Or found a new love of something?

OP posts:
beguilingeyes · 28/05/2025 10:54

Queen. They were my favourite band. the first band I saw live in 1977. Can't stand them now. Infantile nonsense.

InvasiveSpecies · 28/05/2025 11:05

shuggles · 27/05/2025 23:22

Do most people not quickly realise that pubs and clubs are a bit shit? Overpriced drinks and not being able to talk to anyone because of the noise. What's the point?

You're going to the wrong pubs and clubs!

bigTillyMint · 28/05/2025 11:19

I still love doing most of the things others have outgrown or never loved. I am now over 60.

Gave up stilettos in about 1990 - I live in trainers and Birkies/boots
Very little clubbing since about 1996, but still love music and very happy to go to Havent stopped dancing yet type events
In person shopping for clothes - online is so much easier!
I stopped in person food shopping about 25 years ago - we get delivery!
Stopped camping about 10 years ago after many years of loving it.

TeachMeSomething · 28/05/2025 11:28

I retired almost 5 years ago. One thing that I'm finally happy to have left behind after a working lifetime of public-facing roles is the very-much mistaken notion that "the customer is always right". That, and having to be professional and polite to people who really don't deserve it.

beguilingeyes · 28/05/2025 11:49

'I've got bored of exchanging gifts.'

So much this. It's relentless. It's Christmas, then my husband's birthday is the week before poxy Valentine's day, then it's my birthday, then the wedding anniversary and then it's bloody Christmas again. Just stop!

giddyauntie123 · 28/05/2025 12:25

@beguilingeyes A bit of drunk radio ga ga is always good though no? 😅

misssultana · 28/05/2025 12:32

Not over 50 yet but late 40's. I kind of think I've always been a bit middle aged in my preferences. I've not had a drink since I was in my teens and I was never a huge fan of clubs, bars or parties although I did enough of that in my teens and twenties to not feel like I've missed out.

I do still enjoy music and concerts but I am not thrilled to pay £100's for a seat miles away from the stage so I am quite choosey about what artists I go to see. I saw The Cure a few years ago in a muddy field and loved it but I'm not sure I'd enjoy a multi day festival, in my teens I might have but even my my 20's I wasn't keen.

My favourite day out was in my 20's and still is a solo mooch around an art show, then popping in for some lunch, tea and cake, followed by a look round some second hand bookshops, hopefully finding some hitherto unknown must read then meeting my husband for dinner and a film.

I'm not sure I ever much enjoyed shopping, except for bookshops but I used to spend a lot more time looking round the shops and spend more as a result. Now I really cannot be bothered with shopping and if I have to go out to buy something its a mission to get it with as little hassle / shopping as possible. I do just prefer buying online if I need something which is probably not great.

I did used to love evening classes but these seem to have dwindled in availability over the past 10 years, plus I live semi rurally now and its a trek to get to one so I don't really bother anymore. I was probably more of a joiner in and now I can't be bothered. I do still take online classes and develop my interests independently.

I don't watch too much TV these days, films yes and feature length documentaries and DH and I do watch drama box sets together sometimes but I never put the tv on and just watch whatever is on so I never really watch live tv. I also don't do social media.

I am way more into my home comforts and love to plan and cook interesting healthy food and do my own home baking. I love to read and take care of myself with things like Yoga, meditation and exercise.

It feels like we haven't really travelled in such a long time but we are due to travel soon and I am looking forward to it. I think in future I might prefer to plan a bigger more expensive holiday every couple of years then have UK holidays the other years rather than going on cheaper more numerous city breaks (which I didn't mind) or resort holidays which I never really liked much anyway.

I swither with friendships, on one hand I worry I have too few as older friends have moved further away or we've drifted apart. I also quite enjoy not having so much of my time taken up with lots of socialising, I think I forced myself to do a lot of that when I was younger even when I'd rather have been doing something else because I thought it was important or just what you did. I suppose I wouldn't say no to the right friendship if it happened.

I feel I am just becoming more of who I was anyway as I get older and some of the stuff I felt I should do is falling away.

beguilingeyes · 28/05/2025 12:32

No. Similarly I never want to hear Sweet Caroline again now it's been ruined by drunken singalongs.

coldanddark · 28/05/2025 12:32

for those that are not interested in socialising and/or like to stay at home ..
do you have friends, and if not are you not bothered about having friends, and/or how do you keep your friends ?

just asking out of curiosity,

istabraq · 28/05/2025 12:34

Men

coldanddark · 28/05/2025 12:34

@beguilingeyes I NEVER want to hear that song ever again or Take That Never Forget ..(shudder)

ClarasSisters · 28/05/2025 12:44

I've given up giving a shit what other people think of me. Pretty liberating that one.

SamDeanCas · 28/05/2025 12:44

Sleeping in the same bed as anyone. I want peace and the whole bed to myself (thank god my dh works shifts)

I went off clubs in my 40s, couldn’t think of anything worse than going out on the piss until 2am, now I’m also going off pubs, Urghh to sitting in a pub all evening (although I don’t mind a cider in a nice beer garden on an afternoon.

Im the same with shopping, I now buy second hand, haven’t bought anything new (other than underwear) for a few years now

socialising in general, I have a few good friends I meet up with, but I don’t get fomo any longer about mates meeting up

DismondShoes · 28/05/2025 12:46

It’s not really a got bored of one but I am
mid 50’s and have decided to not do anything extreme such as bungee jumping or massive zip wires/high ropes again, I still like parasailing.

BIossomtoes · 28/05/2025 13:03

DismondShoes · 28/05/2025 12:46

It’s not really a got bored of one but I am
mid 50’s and have decided to not do anything extreme such as bungee jumping or massive zip wires/high ropes again, I still like parasailing.

Carry on! I did a skydive to celebrate my 60th birthday and was treated like a queen. The Welsh zip wire is still on my list 12 years later.

JumpingDizzy · 28/05/2025 13:09

BIossomtoes · 28/05/2025 13:03

Carry on! I did a skydive to celebrate my 60th birthday and was treated like a queen. The Welsh zip wire is still on my list 12 years later.

My friend did the Welsh one. She loved it.

OP posts:
DismondShoes · 28/05/2025 13:10

BIossomtoes · 28/05/2025 13:03

Carry on! I did a skydive to celebrate my 60th birthday and was treated like a queen. The Welsh zip wire is still on my list 12 years later.

I wish I could but my fear for heights which I only seemed to get about 10 years ago is really bad.

BIossomtoes · 28/05/2025 13:18

DismondShoes · 28/05/2025 13:10

I wish I could but my fear for heights which I only seemed to get about 10 years ago is really bad.

Oh that’s a real shame. My fear of heights is completely inconsistent. Put me on our roof and I’d freak out but it’s fine if I think I can’t come to any harm. The human brain is bizarre.

angsty · 28/05/2025 13:25

@coldanddark I don't really have friends. Not in the sense of people I socialise with, at least. I message and email people sometimes, and have a couple of people I have known for a long time, in one case, over 30 years and they tend to meet up with me on holidays. Otherwise, day to day, I keep to myself and prefer it that way. When I worked in an environment where I had to work with and get on with other people I did so, now I am retired from that and WFH nearly all the time and I don't have to do that, so I don't.

ffsgloria · 28/05/2025 13:41

@coldanddark I have friends but I don't see them often. Just a few local friends that I will see a show or film with, meet for a walk and coffee, individually, every few weeks or so. I have other friends that I see twice a year approx, who live further away. I do also chat online with a couple of others, but it's sporadic. I spent a long time thinking I should be doing more, and having more friends/acquaintances, but I have come to realise that is not actually what I want, and this set up suits me fine. I have lost previous friends due to various dramas and as a highly sensitive autistic person, I can't cope with any of that anymore, so prefer to keep friendships as low key as possible.

WilfredsPies · 28/05/2025 13:47

Crikeyalmighty · 28/05/2025 09:17

@Largerbreakfast I think some are genuinely content this way but I do sense quite a lot of low grade depression on ‘some ‘ posts . I think Covid changed a lot of things too as has a lot of WFH - it’s sent one of my lovely friends mildly agoraphobic - she admits it - finds it a real effort these days to meet up with anyone , and is she isn’t partnered up and doesn’t have kids ( or want them , now in her early 40s) it’s not necessarily how she wants to be.

I’d say that for the majority, it’s less a case of depression and more a case of menopausal ‘not giving a shit’. And prioritising our own inner peace and physical comfort. At 50 odd, most of us will be well down whichever road our lives have taken us on. We’ve done our bit. This is our time of life, where we can do whatever we want. Or more importantly, we can refuse to do the things that just don’t appeal any more.

I’ve got some health stuff that means I’m very unlikely to ever get a birthday telegram from the King. I will be absolutely buggered if I spend my last years on this earth pandering to idiots, shoving my aching feet into beautiful but bloody uncomfortable shoes or tramping about on trains at midnight trying to get home.

Itiswhysofew · 28/05/2025 15:16

beguilingeyes · 28/05/2025 11:49

'I've got bored of exchanging gifts.'

So much this. It's relentless. It's Christmas, then my husband's birthday is the week before poxy Valentine's day, then it's my birthday, then the wedding anniversary and then it's bloody Christmas again. Just stop!

Last Christmas I realised that I just can't stand it anymore. I no longer want to participate.

SlightlyFurther · 28/05/2025 15:22

WilfredsPies · 28/05/2025 13:47

I’d say that for the majority, it’s less a case of depression and more a case of menopausal ‘not giving a shit’. And prioritising our own inner peace and physical comfort. At 50 odd, most of us will be well down whichever road our lives have taken us on. We’ve done our bit. This is our time of life, where we can do whatever we want. Or more importantly, we can refuse to do the things that just don’t appeal any more.

I’ve got some health stuff that means I’m very unlikely to ever get a birthday telegram from the King. I will be absolutely buggered if I spend my last years on this earth pandering to idiots, shoving my aching feet into beautiful but bloody uncomfortable shoes or tramping about on trains at midnight trying to get home.

Thats what’s depressing about many of the posts — that people by their own admission spent twenty or thirty adult years people-pleasing and doing stuff they don’t appear to have really wanted to do. You were as able to wear flats and stay at home aged 25 as you are at 50.

misssultana · 28/05/2025 15:30

Itiswhysofew · 28/05/2025 15:16

Last Christmas I realised that I just can't stand it anymore. I no longer want to participate.

Yeah I feel this too although its more related to my dislike of shopping, if I could somehow divine what everyone wanted I would be happy to get them it but I hate the guesswork and the anxiety about getting something crap. Its too stressful. I do like Christmas time in general as my DH has time off and I love the nice food and lazy days and the lights but gift giving for adults can do one.

Crikeyalmighty · 28/05/2025 16:27

@WilfredsPies there is that too - apparently the don’t give a shit creeps in - but mine came in with a bang !!

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