Aibu to think being unphotogenic is a thing

[PinkChaires]

My DD1 (17)bless her has never been the most photogenic. It wasnt as bad as a baby/child, she just looked a bit different than real life but as she got older its clear she just doesn’t photograph well at all. In real life (in my biased opinion) shes stunning, and many people have said so. She now refused to take any photos of herself at all😢 and its affecting her self esteem. She says being unphotogenic is just a myth . Is it? I certainly think it isnt tbh, dd1 just looks so different, the camera enhances the tiny imperfections. Its the same with my DS (but not my dd2 or 3)

Even now ill look at old pictures of her and think ‘ thats totally different to how i remember you!’

I think good photographs are often all about angles. If someone is nervous it sort of shows in their faces and looks awkward. I used to hate having my photo taken and then had a charming photographer boyfriend who used to randomly take photos.

I’m sure there were hundreds of duff shots but he used to send me the lovely ones and it made me feel more relaxed which made me look better in photos more generally. My favourite shot was in black and white holding a coffee with a far away look ehich I’m sure is a massive cliche but I love it.

Yes I think it’s a thing. I also think it’s true in reverse. A family member photographs really well and whilst they are attractive in real life, in pictures (not filtered or photoshopped) they often look absolutely stunning. They don’t like it as they have said some people are disappointed when they meet her in person 😂.

For my part I’ve noticed over the years that the angle of a photo massively impacts how I look. My dad is a keen photographer and when I was younger he took loads of me to work out my best “angle”.

What might help your DD is having her photo taken by a professional photographer who will be able to help her work out what angle/positions work for her.

Shes not in all likelihood totally unphotogenic, but probably more like me where I have some brilliant pictures (when I have been able to take them at “my angle”) and some really shitty ones where even my DH thinks I look like a different person 😂.

I do think some people just naturally are photogenic, without posing, or filters or any adjustments. I hate having my photo taken and it gets worse with time.

I do know some people whose faces are lovely to watch in real life because of their endearing expressions and sudden smiles, which don’t get captured in photos.

I also think some people are really bad at posing for photos: they put on odd fake expressions and hold themselves in weird poses. This can be improved.

I take a very bad photo full length smiling into the camera. Waist up and looking at something other than the camera, I look like a normal person 🙂

It’s definitely a thing.

I know people who are the opposite : quite plain in real life but photograph so much better ( and I think they know it as they are always sharing photos of themselves!)

I'm sure I've read posts on here before about this subject which concluded that it is a thing. Someone will be along to explain it properly, I'm sure. I know I'm very self conscious about photos being taken and immediately freeze and look awkward. Maybe if you and her can keep trying until you get a photo of her that she likes and print it out for her to keep somewhere for reassurance. I often think the teen I was would completely flounder in these "perfect image" obsessed times.

It is a thing. I have very flat bone structure and look odd in photos, and as I know this I struggle to pose naturally. I hate photos of me.
I do agree with op that professional photographers manage to get pictures I like , probably because they get the lighting and angles right.

I am 100% convinced that I am far more gorgeous than I look in both photos and mirrors. So you are definitely NBU, OP. 😀

Hell yes, this is a thing! I've never claimed to be the most beautiful person in the world, but I'm ok. Photos tell a different story! They always seem to catch me with, e.g., eyes closed, tummy sticking out, inane smile, etc etc. In every 100 photos I see of me, I reckon 2-3 are half decent.

But it also works the other way. I know people who always seem to look stunning in photos. Indeed, look at super models - they often look "normal" irl, but stunning in photos.

I'm sure your daughter is beautiful. Tell her the camera is just not kind to some people.

Absolutely. Look at some beauty models - they can be quite plain in real life but the ‘camera loves’ them. And quite stunning people can just look a bit off in photos.

My wedding photographer said "I won't embarrass you with any of the close-ups". All photos of me are from a distance. True to their word, I didn't see any photos of my face close up.

I look entirely normal in real life. In photos, I look utterly hideous.

The only decent photos of me are when I'm holding a baby which I think fits with yours when your looking at something.

A professional photographer told me he'd photographed pieces of wood that were more animated than I was. I thought that was a bit harsh, almost matched the art teacher who wrote on my report that I couldn't draw a straight line with the aid of a ruler.

Unless I'm caught naturally chatting, laughing, I always look a bit awkward, or when you need a photo for a passcard etc.

When we got married, many moons ago, we noth told the photographers we weren't good in photos but they were brilliant, they settled us, had us interacting etc and yeah couple if photos weren't great but we got a beautiful album and actually added more pics to it.

I think forced photos/selfies for can be uncomfortable for some people and that affects the quality style of the image.

My photos don't look anything like the person I see in the mirror which is really weird

This is definitely a “thing” and a number of my friends have commented on it. In real life I don’t look awful. In photographs? I look like my elderly Uncle Dave 🤷‍♀️

Yes, although I do think being relaxed in front of the camera helps a lot

I read that people that photograph well are often the least facially expressive.
I look terrible in photos but I am aware I use my face a lot . It means I invariably means i have my eyes closed in photos too.
I can’t tell you how hard I try to hold my younger up , tilt, half smile etc and still group photos heed to be redone as I look deranged.

It absolutely is. I’ve known attractive people always look dire in photos, and perfectly average people look like models.

To give an example, I went to the wedding of a couple of similar levels of attractiveness. But in their photos she didn’t look great at all whereas he looked stunning. Like, astonishingly so. He didn’t look like that in real life!

It definitely is a thing. Some people definitely photograph better than others, regardless of angles - any modelling agency or casting director will tell you that.

Yeah I have the opposite where I photograph really well but don’t always look so great in real life!

That’s because the mirror is showing you a reflection, meaning that you are seeing a reversed image of yourself. The camera shows you the right way around, as other people would see you.

I think I read somewhere it's to do with facial symmetry.. the more symmetrical your face the better you photograph

I don’t photograph well either (but am gorgeous in real life 🤣🤣). I think it’s something to do with the angles of the face and how the light hits it.