Aibu to think being unphotogenic is a thing

[PinkChaires]

My DD1 (17)bless her has never been the most photogenic. It wasnt as bad as a baby/child, she just looked a bit different than real life but as she got older its clear she just doesn’t photograph well at all. In real life (in my biased opinion) shes stunning, and many people have said so. She now refused to take any photos of herself at all😢 and its affecting her self esteem. She says being unphotogenic is just a myth . Is it? I certainly think it isnt tbh, dd1 just looks so different, the camera enhances the tiny imperfections. Its the same with my DS (but not my dd2 or 3)

Has she got a less angular face?

Yeap. I had a classmate who was really quite ordinary looking but was a child model because she was photogenic

No I've been told that before, flipped the photo and still nothing like the mirror. The person was convinced it would work but admitted it didn't.

Very much a thing. I look awful in nearly all photos. I don’t look (that bad) in real life. It’s really annoying especially when the rest of my family look great in all pictures.

I do think this is true, and I'm that way myself! I always look flat like I've been superimposed on. A combination of feeling awkward and expecting a crap result, probably. However, I recently came across some advice online on how to pose to get a good photo and find I'm happier with the results.

Ooo what is it?!

ETA: asking for a friend … 😬

It's definitely a thing. I've sometimes been shocked to see photos of people who are very attractive in real life but the camera makes them nearly unrecognisable. Cameras seem to hate some faces and exaggerate the flaws and ignore the good things. The reverse is also true with ordinary looking people who look great in photos.

Photographer here. I photograph a lot of "beautiful people" for a living. It really is one of those "beauty is in the eye of the beholder" scenarios. The funny thing is, for a photographer, it's really about flattering angles, moment and focal lengths (as mentioned above, some people genuinely look better with different lens compressions). The image shown is true, if you use a wide-angle lens, you do end up with a bigger-looking nose. Imagine it stretches your features, whereas a longer focal length compresses them, like squashing something flat. Both approaches work differently for different faces, things, or places.
For me, my job is to make the client happy with how they look and bring out the best I possibly can on that particular day, and I genuinely enjoy doing that. I don’t believe there are “ugly” or “unphotogenic” people. I think they just haven’t been shown in the right way or to the right audience.
I also saw a comment from a photographer saying a wooden post was more animated, that kind of comment never helps. In fact, it only makes someone feel worse and less confident in front of the camera. Learning to appreciate yourself is what really matters here. Once you accept that, the idea of not being “worth photographing” should disappear, because you are just YOU.
Document the time. Enjoy looking back on it for what it was.
If anyone is interested in understanding portrait photography or wondering how and why things work, here’s a link to a blog I wrote specifically about portraits and what makes them effective. Some future reading or things to note on the subject, Portrait Photography

I'm totally unphotogenic. My now DH FB friended me after we first met and looked at some of my photos and has openly said he was concerned his memory of what I actually look like was because he was quite drunk when we met. I look like a troll in photos. Passable in real life 🤣

It's definitely a thing, and it works in reverse too - two girls from the high school my DCs attended, girls they sat in class with, are now based in Paris and earning $$$$$$$ modeling. These girls were nothing to look at irl but stunning in photos. One just about made the height cutoff (5'8") to be taken on by an agency - it was the potential of her face that got her on the books. Obv both very thin.

It is definitely a thing.

It's basically inexplicable too.

I had a boyfriend who complained
"Gardeninging. You're really pretty but there isn't a single good photo of you to put up on the shelves". And I agreed 100%. People say I'm alright looking but I'm a proper monster in photos! 😭🤣.

It's definitely a thing. I'm not that bad IRL but I look awful in photos. I've just accepted it and snap away anyway.

If my dh takes my photo, it is the most unflattering, ugly picture to have ever existed!! Why does his bloody camera do that to me??

My ds looks awkward in every photo and in most of school photos, he looks drunk! One year was so bad I didn't even bother buying the photos, family would have thought I hated them if I sent those out! 😂😂

Its a thing. I went to school with a truly beautiful girl who was scouted to be a model. In photography she became an exceedingly plain girl, to the point you'd hardly recognise her. She only had 1 modelling job in the end. I also take the worst picture, I'm always pink, have my eyes closed and seem to be pulling a face. Selfie are better when I can see what I look like!
My SiL is the opposite, she takes a wonderful picture, but looks quite normal in real life.

I never know how to take it when a friend often says to me, Opal Bear you're SO photogenic! is the sub text you're not as attractive in real life ! 😂

Yep it’s a thing. I’m normal in real life yet the camera only see’s a potato.

I am totally unphotogenic.

Even my best friends say I look lovely face to face but look shocking in photos (we’ve been friends for a long time so it was said with love..)

People sometimes forget that retouched images are a normal part of professional photography. Most photos you see have some kind of post-production work, maybe whiter teeth, a neater jawline, or just better light balance. Whether it’s portraits or weddings, nearly every image is edited in some way. It all depends on who's doing the editing.
A camera captures a moment, but without understanding how to shape light, even a great moment can look off. For example, if you shine a light straight down from above or up from under the chin, it can make someone look harsh or sinister. But move that light above the head and angle it gently towards the eyes, suddenly it’s flattering.
The camera is just a tool. What really matters is how it's used. Lighting, posing, and the angle all work together to bring out the best in someone.

Definitely a thing plus things you do in photos make a huge difference like looking up or down, the way you smile,5 how your hair is.
Thankfully the best ever photos of me were on my wedding day. Usually I'm not keen on photos of me and windy weather my biggest enemy, I have a high forehead and if my fringe is disturbed, disaster! These days a bit of a tan and sunglasses really help.
DS is very good looking and I have some great pics of him, equally in some shots he looks awful and nothing like he looks in real life.

I look horrible in photos unless i do a certain pose and take the pic myself - after a dozen of takes i might get a good one. I'm not great looking in real life either so that doesn't help. So i rarely have pics of myself taken, i look very beastly and awkward in them.

On the other hand my coworker is extremely photogenic and I rarely ever see her in person but when i do i'm always shocked as she looks completely different and not as "attractive" as her photos.

I’m 50 and all my life I have always been told I’m beautiful. (Not to brag LOL)
There’s about 3 photos of me that I like. Seriously un-photogenic here!