Aibu to think being unphotogenic is a thing

[PinkChaires]

My DD1 (17)bless her has never been the most photogenic. It wasnt as bad as a baby/child, she just looked a bit different than real life but as she got older its clear she just doesn’t photograph well at all. In real life (in my biased opinion) shes stunning, and many people have said so. She now refused to take any photos of herself at all😢 and its affecting her self esteem. She says being unphotogenic is just a myth . Is it? I certainly think it isnt tbh, dd1 just looks so different, the camera enhances the tiny imperfections. Its the same with my DS (but not my dd2 or 3)

It is 100% a thing. I know people who I've seen in photos where they look amazing, and never look like that IRL, and vice versa. Sadly I fall into the latter camp - when I stepped into online dating, my friends who helped me taking photos laughed about how bad I looked in most of them vs what I look like in reality. My DD commented the other day about how I need to get OK with that because she wants to have photos to remember me by when I die (thanks!). She has a point. I have almost no photos of me from my teens and twenties (when I really did look great IRL, just not so much in photos), which makes me a bit sad.

There's this woman on Insta who posts about how to take better photos of yourself without using filters etc. https://www.instagram.com/thechristinebuzan/
Obvs you don't want to make your DD self conscious or unconfident, but honestly she's really helpful.

Linda Evangelista once said something about a photographer in her early days saying she should always have her lips slightly apart in photos because her angles didn't photograph well otherwise. And Kate Moss has talked about how the lighting, angles, height of camera etc transform her from average to supermodel.

I think a good professional photographer with studio lighting could do a decent job with most people.

Totally a real thing - my friend looks absolutely stunning in photos, in real life she’s perfectly pretty, but not the magazine model that her photos suggest.

yes. Hence why there are such people as model (or were before instagram) who are not classically beautiful but look great in photos. Square heads work well often - light bounces off the jaw lines etc. is her face round or oval? She can photo well enough but if not naturally photogenic isn’t going to have the correct angles to look good in every pic. Im the same and it’s super upsetting - especially when the people around you are shit photographers so you never get any decent photos. She could take some lessons to learn to pose and you could take some (secret) photography lessons to get better snaps to help boost her confidence.

It's definately a thing and you can find official articles online.

I am very self concious about photos myself which in turn makes me look worse! Guess i tense up and look odd.

Best photos are those we don't know are being taken, could you try and get some nice ones for her?

It's because people's faces are three-dimensional, and photos are two-dimensional. Some people's faces don't flatten well!

I think it's a thing and to do with contrast. More contrast, more photogenic. I don't have much contrast but my filters on my phone add it. I look best in black and white photos

Some people are definitely more photogenic. My friend (who is attractive but plain) absolutely shines in photographs. I don't really recognise her in photos.
I've known other attractive people who just look awful in photos. The lense exaggerates and highlights their imperfections everytime.

Yes it's a thing and must have something to do with angles or certain face shapes / types looking better in photographs than actually being a reflection on attractiveness

I never liked photos of myself but as I've got older and less vain I appreciate having memories to look back on

I look quite nice in real life. I am literally terrible in photos. Every one says it.
I have a friend who is very plain and forgettable in real life. Literally like one of those AI everywoman models. No distinguishing features. In photos she is drop dead gorgeous. Like she glows!

Very strange.

I look better in pics. I don't see it as a compliment. People always fawn over my pics and I can tell that they think they are much better than the real me (who is goofy and expressive, and kinda gawky in real life).

I've just accepted it now (at 50).

I look awful in photos. Rarely get a good photo of myself.
I heard once that it's because we are 3D but photos are 2D.

I think it’s a thing.

My best friend from school was incredibly beautiful both as a teen and adult but never looked good in photos. Even though she’s good at things like angles etc. She’s someone you have to see in movement to get it I think.

I would say I’m middling - neither awful nor really photogenic.

Some people though look amazing in photos.

I take the most awful photos but the best ones of me are when I dont know i am being photographed, so I guess it is something I do.......

Of course it’s a thing. In the same way some models can be absolutely stunning in photos and ‘just’ pretty in real life, some people can be pretty in real life and totally fugly in photos (me for instance 😂)

I am the opposite- I’m very photogenic and look far better in photos than in real life.

I'm categorically unphotogenic.

I just look better in 3D.

Not brilliant, but better.

I’m the same as your daughter- I’ve always been told how attractive I am in real life and yet in 90% of photos I look really plain. It gave me a complex when I was younger as I couldn’t understand why I consistently looked awful in photos and it made me think I was really unattractive in real life even though the mirror and people around me said differently.

However, it also goes the other way. I know of people who are pretty average looking in real life and yet in photos they always look amazing. I can’t explain it but some features work better in photos.

It's a thing. I look awful in photos. I think it's my nose as it's on the larger side and completely takes over my face unless the angle of the photo is very specific. I'm not the most attractive person but I do look better in mirrors and in person.

Yes this is me. I think I have quite an expressive face so candid shots are particularly bad. I remember having my photo taken for a newspaper once and my friends and family being so awkward about it because I clearly looked awful. I also blame the current trend of everyone insisting on taking photos from above which makes my nose look twice the size.

Of course it’s a thing!
I have two siblings, one is very attractive and turns heads when out, but looks dreadful in every single photo. The other is unremarkable in real life but comes across as beautiful and glowy in photos. It’s weird.

🤣🤣🤣

Yes it’s that glowy look! I actually think it’s people with very pasty complexion and the camera kind of reflects off it like the moon or something!

Oh my god, I've found my people. I take fucking hideous photos. David Bailey would be hard pressed to manage a decent shot of me. So much so, I have a deep pathological hatred of being in photos and for the most part refuse to do so. The current phenomenon of photographing oneself to share with the world on an almost hourly basis is to me like one of the seven circles of hell! shudder I have no words of comfort, except to say : I get it.