DP expected me to move off the sofa so she could take my seat

[randomskittles]

DP was out all morning, I was at home. We have a corner sofa with a chaise and a second two-seater sofa. When she arrived home mid afternoon I was lying on my stomach on the corner sofa working on my laptop.

She came into the room with her earphones in and said 'can I sit down, Skittles?'

I sat up to make space for her (although the two seater was free) and put my legs out on the chaise. She continued staring at me.

I said, 'do you want me to move?'

She shouted, 'WHAT?' and took out an earphone. I repeated my question.

She responded, 'yeah. I've been looking forward to coming home, eating my lunch and sitting in this seat'.

I said, 'I just think it's a bit rude to make someone move from the seat they're in'

She said, 'if you want to argue, go ahead'

I knew arguing with her was pointless so I got up and went and sat in the other room.

AIBU to feel hurt by this? She is now acting like nothing happened

Why did you move?? I'd have told them to f off

What a controlling weirdo! Why does she get top trumps on the best seat? Rude, too!

I don't know how you have the energy to deal with such petty squabbles, never mind post on the internet and expect anybody else to have the energy to.

If you're squabbling over this honestly what's the point just call it a day

I always just say "no" if someone dares ask me to move.

Unless it's my dog.

Sounds like a fun, happy and loving relationship you have there...

This is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with?

You didnt need to argue. Just dont move.

Is her name Sheldon Cooper?

Relationships are meant to enhance your life. Does this one do that?

Because I knew she would start saying that I was selfish or difficult or nasty. Sometimes it's not worth saying no to her because I can't face the argument. And I wasn't sure if refusing to move would mean I was being difficult

Sorry OP, but why didn't you just tell her to feck off? Why on earth would you move for someone else's comfort, unless they've broken a leg or something, and you have the only chair that would be comfortable for them. Doesn't sound like this is a relationship that's likely to go the distance, your partner sounds selfish as fuck!

She sounds like a twat. Leave her.

And they don’t even ask, do they? They just look at you!

We have our "own" spots we usually sit in (I like the corner, he likes the recliner, child usually wedges herself in with one of us or if she's settling in for a chill she goes for the chaise). But, if I've sat on the recliner for any reason, and he comes in he just plonks himself in the corner.

It's really not argument worthy.

I rarely ever say this but I think that it intolerable. You should not be in a relationship with someone who would so casually but so fundamentally disrespect you. She thinks her needs and wants are more important than you on every possible level. It’s the fact that “who sits in a chair” is such a small thing that makes it such a big thing. Your comfort, your opinions, your right to exist in the same space as her are dismissed as less than. It is absurd and it is absolutely irredeemable.

So Sheldonesque.. you're in my spot
One for Big bang fan's 🤣

Ltb

Are they sheldon from big bang theory

And take the sofa

Apart from not understanding how you can work on your laptop while lying your stomach, you should have stayed put.

Lying on your stomach and working on your laptop - that's incredibly bad for you.

This.

I normally have "my" spot on the sofa and DH has his and I always feel mildly put out if anyone is in my spot for any reason. But I wouldn't dream of saying anything or expecting someone to move. That would be weird and rude.

Exactly. My book or whatever I'm working on hobby wise is usually around "my" spot, there's a phone charger readily accessible, my drink is usually next to it etc etc.

But it genuinely doesn't matter if I need to sit elsewhere. I'll use DHs charger, move my glass, I can pick up my book from the other end of the sofa. Not hard.

The only way I could maybe partially understand would be if you know this is their favourite spot, you've been home all day, free to sit wherever you want, and now that they're home, you knew that they'd want to sit there to eat. If I knew I was in DH's preferred spot and there was no particular reason I needed to stay there, I'd probably just move over so he could be more comfortable, but on the other hand, they didn't have to be so forceful and argumentative.

Yes!!!